Things I learned along the way

or things I learned because I had to

sueinaz

sueinaz
Location
Arizona,
Birthday
February 26
Bio
Your average inconsistent X'er I used to care very much about being a good Republican, but I don't know what that means anymore. I now focus my energies on writing about growing up, the politics of Animal Welfare. I volunteer. I organize fund raisers. I do my best to raise awareness about cruelty, gay penguins, stupid people who keep wild animals as pets and showing funny cat videos. I also write extensively about my family who would probably laugh about this blog, then choke me (but not hard enough for it to be a felony). You can also find me at: http://catsandpolitics.blogspot.com/

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Salon.com
JULY 6, 2010 12:19PM

You Remind Me... Open Call

Rate: 6 Flag
 I'm issuing an open call - reflecting on who we are to other people in our lives...
 

The moment I met Kurt he was incredibly warm, far more friendly than I ever expected when meeting a new colleague for the first time. In those first moments he insisted I join him and others at lunch. He sat next to me and just talked. He went out of his way to help me settle into my new job. He made me feel welcome.

In short order I learned he chose a second career as a teacher instead of sitting around watching TV or touring the country in an RV. He met his second wife on a electronics chat board. He loved how the internet made everything accessible to him.

College students energized him, and he made a point of debating anyone he could find. He developed a bit of a cult following, and even when his first round of cancer ravaged him he still made time to argue with whoever was around.

He loved eating strange foods and trying new things. During his intermission, he excitedly walked up to me and said he discovered new music. We sat down and watched youtubes of Tibetan throat-singing and Aboriginal digeridoo playing. One afternoon in March I went with him to eat the hottest Korean food in Phoenix.

Shortly after our last lunch I learned that Kurt died in an email. I had no idea he was that sick, I knew he was dying, but not so soon. In a blur a few days later I was at his funeral service.

His service was filled with poems, world music and countless stories about how kind he was. At one point his daughter was called to speak. As his daughter stepped forward a friend reached over and touched my shoulder.

“She looks just like you.”

Yes. Kurt’s daughter and I looked very much alike - so much so that we could be sisters.

Suddenly I understood what happened a few weeks earlier.

I had walked over while he was sitting outside waiting for a ride. It was blindingly sunny. I waved as I approached.

Kurt smiled “It’s been too long, I’m so glad you’re here. We should call each other more often. I miss your voice.” Then he blinked and said “Oh, Sue, it’s nice to see you too. You remind me I have some calls I need to make.”

After the service Kurt’s daughter walked up to me and said “I didn’t believe him but we really do look like doppelgangers.” We stood looking at each other for a moment, then parted silently.

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This is a beautiful story, so sorry for your loss. Kurt sounds like a wonderful man; a very nice tribute.

R~
I'm sorry you lost your friend.
What a great tribute.
Reminds me of the loss of a friend from high school, so suddenly and learned too of it from email. He and I were yin and yang of sorts. Thanks for the trip. He died two years ago on the 24th of this month. Wow. Shit.

Excellent and rated.