Ok, so it's everywhere already - Christmas is on it's way. Well, it's almost everywhere. Out here in Saudi Arabia we are blessedly spared the countdown that begins somewhere mid-July in the rest of the world. However, despite being shut off from this drawn out, anticipation spoiling, irritating countdown I have found myself counting down without the help of pre-Halloween Christmas sales and over played Christmas classics.

 Ger and I have booked our Christmas holiday. On the 17th of December we will be jumping on a plane and heading across the globe to lovely, ice cold, hopefully white Christmas Canada. I can't wait. Seriously, I LOVE Christmas. Infact I probably love it to the point where I will irritate my father-in-law-to-be to no end with my childish excitement, the Christmas songs on loop and my general cheery, rosy cheeked disposition. I know this because it will get up Ger's nose at least a tiny bit, and apparently they are quite alike so I'm bound to make some kind of impression on his daddy. But you know what? I don't care.

I normally leave my gift buying until the day before Christmas Eve. As you may have guessed, I detest the drawing out of Christmas festivities. As much as I love the holiday and the giving of gifts, it totally ruins the burst of excitement if you've been thinking and preparing for it for months on end. However, this year I need to be on the ball, and not just because I will be occupied with meeting the in-laws on the immediate run up to Christmas.

This year I have to buy gifts for people I've never met - can you say eek? The adults I can handle I think, a couple of jokey gifts and we're all laughing (speak now or forever hold your peace if this is not the case guys!); but the kids, they're a different ball game all together!

So, I head to Google and do a search for gift ideas and I happen upon what seems to be a brilliant site - www.findgift.com. This site has a very useful gift wizard which takes certain pieces of information from you about the intended recipient and then churns out a wide array of gifts for sale on many different sites.

I decided to look for Ger's 9-year-old nephew first as I find boys very hard to buy for. First stage of the gift wizard asks 'male or female', I check the male box. Stage two, 'what is their relationship to you?'; the best option is nephew. Stage three, age - 9. Final stage, occassion - Christmas. 

Here are some of the top suggestions supposedly suitable for these criteria:

Personalised soap.

Stranger safety DVD.

Make your own ukulele kit.

Lyme disease plush doll.

Lavander boy's silk tie.

Butterfly paperweight.

Now, I know I went on the site because I was struggling for ideas as to what to buy a 9-year-old boy, but I don't think I'm that out of touch! Seriously, do any of you know a boy who would be thrilled beyond belief to open a gift from the youngest adult in the room and find a butterfly paperweight?! And a Lyme disease plush doll?! I didn't think so. 

Moving on, I entered the criteria for Ger's 7-year-old niece next. I have already bought her a little gift, and buying for girls is a piece of cake, but I was curious as to what this wizard would suggest. Here are some of the more bizarre options:

Personalised pillow cover.

Seat belt snoozer.

Owl ceramic pitcher.

Pickle bandages.

 Bed bug plush doll.

Is it just me folks? Can you imagine the face of a little girl as she excitedly rips off the shiny wrapping paper to reveal a box of pickle shaped band aids?

"Merry Christmas honey, you must've been on the naughty list this year!"

I was hooked on the site now though so Ger's criteria went in next. For your entertainment I shall leave you with the list of gifts that could be making it into Ger's stocking this year:

Hot dog feeder.

Plush dolls of commen ailments. 

Women's clogs.

Spa pig figurines.

Snail fan.

Frog couple personalised Christmas ornament.

 Armadillo wooden carving.

Wine lovers sunglasses.

Finch Valley winery bird house.

 Or perhaps I'll just go with what I'd already picked out for him ...

52 weeks of naughty nights.