It's Mom Day. I picked her up this afternoon and we set off for our regular round of errands and lunch. I'm a little stressed out right now and really didn't feel like being around anybody today. What I really wanted to do is find a dark hole filled with X-Files dvds and cake booze that I could curl up in. But, duty calls, so I tried to get all zenny and deal.

The results of that mood was that I was a little withdrawn. I was sort of on auto-pilot while listening to my Mom's conversation. I tried to make sure I went uh-huh in the right places. I thought I was doing a pretty good job.

Then I started to notice a trend in my Mom's conversation. If I drifted off too far, she'd throw in little one liners to lure me back. Here are some of my favorites from today:

• "...his walker wheel fell off. What did he think was going to happen if he kept racing down the hall with it popping wheelies?"

• "...well it turns out her husband is gay. There was nothing else they could do, they had to move to Kansas City."

• "...everything was going well, and then I dropped a piece of fish in my shoe."

• "...you know Helen, she's the one with the cute Jack Daniel's terrier."

• "...he had to go into assisted living. They caught him trying to fry an egg in the toaster."

• "...that's why we're worried about Beth. Thank goodness someone spotted a copy of Guns and Ammo in her recycler."

I do love Wednesdays.