“Let’s sit up here for a change.”

“Mom, we’re almost sitting in the salad bar.  Let’s move back a bit.”

“It will be exciting to sit where all the action is.”

“All the action of the Old Country Buffet salad bar.  That’s life in the fast lane.”

“Don’t be so cynical.  I asked to go here for you, you know.”

“For me?  Why?  I always swear we’re never going to come back every time we eat here.”

“I asked to go here because I thought it would get your mind off all your worries.”

“All my worries except for the fact that I’m sitting in the Old Country Buffet salad bar.  Let’s move back a little Mom.”

“No, I like it here.”

“You have that look on your face.  What are you up to?”

“Up to?  Why do I have to be up to something just because I want to liven things up a bit?”

“Because I know you, and I know that look.  Now let’s see if I can figure out why you want to sit here all of the sudden…… Ah ha!  I know why you want to sit here.”

“Why?”

::whispering:: “You’re doing recon' on the skirt man.”

::whispering::  “I am not.  Now go get me carrot salad.  Did you bring your camera?”

::whispering::  “You want me to take a picture of the carrot salad?”

::whispering::  “No, of the skirt man.  No one believes me when I tell them.  I want photo proof.”

::whispering::  “So you’re admitting that’s why we’re sitting in the salad bar.”

::whispering::  “I’m doing no such thing.  He just happens to be sitting next to us, that’s all.”

“Uh huh.  I’ll go get your carrot salad, you snoop.”

::whispering:: “…shhhhhhhhh.”

“Here you go.  I put a little seafood salad underneath the carrots.”

“You better not have!”

“I didn’t.  I’m teasing.”

::whispering::  “Get your camera ready, he’s going to stand up.”

::whispering:: “Mom, I can’t just whip the camera out and snap his picture!  He’s not Lindsay Lohan!”

::whispering::  “That’s that girl they’re always talking about on TMZ.  They dissed her just last night for stealing jewelry.”

::whispering::  “ ‘Dissed?’  Where did you pick up that word?”

::whispering::  “They say it on TMZ.  Harvey uses it and he’s a lawyer, so it must be okay.”

::whispering:: “First ‘snarky’ now ‘dissed’.  I don’t know if I approve of you watching that show.”

::whispering:: “What are you going to do about it?”

::whispering::  “I could lock it out using the cable remote.  You’d never figure out how to unlock it.”

::whispering::  “That would be really mean.  You just don’t like it because soon I’ll be hipper than you.”

::whispering::  “Why are we whispering?”

::whispering:: “Because you’re going to take a picture of the skirt man.  He went to the bathroom.  Get a picture of him when he comes back through.”

::whispering::  “Mom, I really don’t know how I can do that and not make it obvious.”

::whispering::  “I’ll move my walker a little bit.  Take a picture from under the table.  Here he comes!  Get your camera!”

****

 ::whispering::  “Did you get the picture?”

::whispering::  “I think so.”

::whispering:: “Let’s move.”

::whispering:: “Mom, we can’t move without looking really weird.”

::whispering::  “Weirder than a man in a prairie skirt?”

::whispering:: “I’m not moving.  You made your snoop bed, now we have to eat in it.”

::whispering::  “Well you have to admit it’s making you forget about all your worries for awhile.”

::whispering::  “That’s true.  Now I’m only worried about getting beat up by a man in a prairie skirt.”

(It's a shame he didn't have on his sunflower print)