Deven McKay

Deven McKay
Location
Seattle, Washington,
Birthday
July 01
Bio
I've changed a lot in the last five years, some good, some bad, some things are just different. I'm trying to find a way back to me, but I'm pretty sure that my GPS has dementia.

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SEPTEMBER 28, 2009 9:33PM

Mom Day: Meat Loaf, it's not what you think

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mom's meatloaf
Mom's meat loaf, but that's not what we're talking about here
 
 
"Before we go, I want you to sit down and write out a letter.  I want you to post it on the computer."

"Well this is always interesting..."

"Yes, the ladies want to write a letter to Meat Loaf Aday."

"Oh lord Mom, more Meat Loaf talk?  I swear y'all are all fixated."

"Fixated?!  No!  We're just fans.  Appreciative fans. Don't pretend like you don't have some stars you appreciate too.  I wrote out that letter to Miss Mary Lynn for you.  Now you can return the favor."

"Miss Mary Lynn?  Who's that?"

"Ha!  Pretending like you don't remember... She was the Romper Room lady."

"Romper Room?  What was I?  Like four?"

"Something like that.  I didn't have the heart to tell you that they wouldn't pick your letter.  Your name is too weird.  Anyway, back to Meat Loaf ..."

"...yes, back to Meat Loaf .  Okay, I'm ready..."

"Dear Mister Aday... oh, should I say Dear Mister Meat Loaf ?  Or just Dear Meat Loaf ?  Maybe that would be too informal..."

"Mom, I don't think you have to worry about being formal in a fan letter to Meat Loaf ."

"I just don't want to be disrespectful.  Never mind, I'll figure out how I want to start off later.  We'll leave it Dear Mister Meat Loft for now."

"You just called him Meat Loft."

"I did not.  So, Dear Mister Meat Loft, the ladies of the Lakeside Retirement Home Movie Club have become recent fans of yours.  We were introduced to you by your appearance in channel 19's movie Citizen Jane.  We were able to see the movie because we got the cable box thing that lets you see channel 18 and 19.  If we hadn't had that box, we couldn't have seen you.  So thank you for the box."

"Mom, Meat Loaf didn't have a thing to do with you guys having the cable converter box."

"You don't know that... so to continue... read that back to me."

"Dear Mister Meat Loft, blah blah blah, thanks for the cable box."

"Yes.  My friends and I were intrigued by the movie Citizen Jane because we thought that it was going to involve a meat loaf a day recipe.  That turns out to be you."

"You really thought that there was going to be a meat loaf a day recipe involved in a drama movie?"

"Yes.  I actually thought that was clever.  I figured the Campbell's Soup people must be sponsers."

"So you thought the action might be centered around people cooking meat loaves?"

"You make it sound like that would have been impossible.  I think that it could have been interesting.  Actually put that in the letter.  Maybe Mister Meat Loft would like to tell his agent about that idea."

"Why do you keep calling him Meat Loft?"

"I do not.  So where were we?"

"You just told him about the meat loaf a day."

"Oh yes.  ::ahem::  So we figured out watching the commercials for the movie that they were talking about you, and not meat loaves.  I had assumed you were a black man..."

"Mom, you can't say that!"

"What?  I did, I had got him mixed up with Catman Brothers."

"Who?"

"You know, that lovely man that with that raspy voice."

" 'Catman'?... oh!  I think you mean Scat Man Crothers.  How could you get him and Meat Loaf mixed up?"

"Well, they both have weird names and act.  Catman was in that movie where Jack Nicklaus goes all crazy."

"Oh.  Yes, you mean where he smashes a nine iron through the door and says 'Here's Johnny.'  Okay, so moving on with the letter, I still don't think you should say that you thought he was a black man.  That's racist."

"Why is that racist?  I assumed that with a name like Meat Loaf , that he must be black.  Like Fried Chicken Carter."

"Who is Fried Chicken Carter?"

"He's this black man that was very talented.  And you'd know that, but I guess younger people are afraid to talk about him for fear of being called racist."

"........my head is beginning to hurt........"

"It's that cell phone.  Not healthy for your head.  So, on to letter - It took us awhile to figure out which actor was you.  When we did, we all decided that you were rather handsome to spite being called a meat loaf.  We do think you got cheated in the movie roll.  You did not have enough scenes.  You should tell someone about that.  Make sure that you are getting your fair share.  They'll take advantage of you in show business...."

"And you know this how?"

"I watch TMZ. I know things!  Anyway - One of my friends, Louise, told us that she believed that you were a singer also.  I asked my daughter to bring us some of your music.  She fired us a tape..."

"I burned you a cd."

"He's in the music business, he'll understand.  We quite enjoyed your music.  Tansy cried during one of your songs, the one about two out of three things and not being sad.  Thelma enjoyed the baseball song.  I thought that was a little racy, but still very enjoyable.  We were all happy to hear that you were going to appear in an episode of one of our favorite shows, Monk.  We all thought that you did an excellent job on that show.  You should be proud."

"I haven't seen that one yet."

"It was good.  Monk is called in on a case..."

"Don't tell me!  I have it on the DVR!"

"Okay, okay.  Let's finish this... My daughter tells me that you are going to appear on an episode of Ghost Hunters.  I don't usually watch that show because I figure I'll know soon enough if ghosts are real, but I'm going to make an exception and watch this episode because of you.  More shows should realize that by having you on, they could increase their audience..."

"...of the key demographic of sixty five to death..."

"Did you say something?"

"No, no... go on."

"In closing, we just want to let you know that we appreciate your good work and think that you are very attractive to spite your strange and rather unappetizing name.  Sincerely, The Ladies of the Lakeside Retirement Home Movie Club."

"Okay, that's good."

"You make sure you put that up on your diary page where he'll see it."

"I will.  I'm sure Meat Loft reads my blog."

"He'll find it.  Bob says that people oogle their names all the time to find if stuff has been written to them."

"Oogle, I think that you mean Google, and that's treading closely on Poodle-Oodle-Noodle territory, so I'm done here."




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Comments

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First! Cuz I never get to be first on your posts!
First! I think Meatloaf would love your letter and your blog. I do! Thanks for the up-date and the laughs.
Make that almost first. That cartouche, she's a fastie.
I'm sure he'd be thrilled to know that he's quite the burning hunk of man with the 75+ set.
Scatman Crothers and Meatloft. It can't get any better than this. Nobody can make this shit up. Your mother is a national treasure! xoxo
"I didn't have the heart to tell you that they wouldn't pick your letter. Your name is too weird. "

~pout~ Yeah, same here, I was mad. Stupid Romper Room bigots!!!

~nodding~

:)
jane, it crossed my mind. He has an official website.

STUPID MAGIC MIRROR.
Your mother has an amazing range of taste and interests. Meatloaf should be so very proud.
I think jane smithie is onto something there - seriously - it would be a really sweet thing for him to do, and the ladies would soooo love it. Plus, you could tell us how it went!
Oh, Romper Room. I waited for my name to be called? It's kind of weird, the lady looking through that thingy and saying she could see kids...

Thanks for the laugh! This was fabby! Oh, Meatloft... I'm sure he never envisioned the demographic he's appealing to now.

A friend just posted this on facebook:

http://twitter.com/shitmydadsays

It's pretty crass, but I laughed.

RATED!
It would be really cool if Meatloft sent your Mom a Campbell's Soup recipe!
Deven, Tell your mom that Meatloaf and I went to Thomas Jefferson HS together. I was very rude to him then. He was called M.L. Aday back then and I thought he was just some big football player. Looking back, I really should have been nicer to him. Maybe the ladies could put in a good word for me?
I thought Scat Man Crothers performance in The Silver Streak was underrated. The Silver Streak itself was itself underrated. Gene Wilder was great, too. Did you know I was completely oblivious to Willie Wonka & the Chocolate Factory? I didn't see it until about 25 years later. I'm not a big Meatloaf fan.
Has she listened to "Paradise By the Dashboard Lights" yet?

Tee Hee.
If Mr. Loaf does NOT read your blog, he really should, Deven.

Especially so I can then piggyback on the Ladies' excellent idea and say, Meatloft, my dear, you are simply divine. Listen to the ladies. They know of what they speak.

The baseball song.

Snerk.
I wish your Mom would watch Mixed Martial Arts/ Extreme Cage Fighting with me. She'd never return to her bourgeois habits.
I'm with your mother and the ladies. When I saw him credited as Meatloaf Aday, I immediately thought they were offering me numerous meatloaf recipes.
go to his website and send him the link. Nothing to lose... I can see him in the television room of your mom's retirement home now...

Like a bat out of hell!
ablonde, "the baseball song" is "Paradise".
Oh jeez, i wondered about that, but then thought, no, couldn't be. Just goes to show ya, go with your instincts. My oh my.
HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh snap, Deven, that was simply THE BEST!!!

Love your mom. She's one of a kind.

Michael Lee Aday has done quite a bit of acting. I always liked his singing though, the man has a hell of a voice.
Hilarious. As always.
I think that the Movie Club needs to watch "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Actually, I've thought that for a long time, but now that I know they're all fans of Meatloaf...
It's so nice that your mom asks you to do things for her. When my mom asks me to "do something" for her it's usually to go check my oil in my car so she can sleep well without having to worry about me. Yeah, I'm old enough to take care of life.
Lordy, I do remember Romper Room.....
I agree with the others, send this to Meatloaf....you never know....
and he was precious on Monk!
I'm not sure anyone got the significant hilarity of this bit:

"Oh. Yes, you mean where he smashes a nine iron through the door and says 'Here's Johnny.'

T, you're a genius...I died laughing as I visualized it.
Rocky Horror, Rocky Horror, Rocky Horror! Oh, please, please, please . . .
Oh this is one of my favorite things I've read in a long time. "Meatloft".
That was hilarious! I do hope Mr Aday gets to read it somehow. My wife and I saw him in concert way back in 1985, not long before fleeing Thatcher's Britain for the USA. He was amazing. The guy should really have tried opera when his voice was still young.

I got the nine-iron reference too.

I thought Romper Room was a UK-only show. They did the same damn thing with the magic mirror, and reading out everyone's name but mine. We all bear the scars of our youth...
I think meatloaf is highly underrated. I sort of like blasting it on the car stereo and driving along singing out loud. I think it's still a pretty sexy album.

plus it's my favorite dinner too. the foodstuff not the man.
I LOVE your meatloaf and your banner. Both are terribly yummy!!
I'm still laughing over "the key demographic of sixty-five to death." Bwahaha! You and your mom are wickedly funny. Now please excuse me while I go deprogram my imagination from reading about the Poodle-Oodle-Noodle again.
I love it "we all decided that you were rather handsome to spite being called a meat loaf. " I think so too! made my day made me laugh out loud love it!
This was hysterical! Now off to read your older blog posts as it appears from the comments that they are similarly funny!
Hilarious and rated. You should see if you can get your mom an autographed pic. If you send him this post, I feel sure you'll hear back!
GeeBee, not only is Romper Room not just UK, but (I think) there were many different versions at various localities throughout the US. I might be wrong - I'd be old enough to remember, but we didn't have a TV til I was 10 yrs old.
I'll vote for Rocky Horror but only if you take them out to see the full on show with the audience participation, newspapers, toilet paper, rice, etc.
oh my god. I love this. If Meatloaf doesn't love it, he's a crazy man. But, I suspect he's a super nice guy so there you go. Both he and Catman. hee hee
Hilarious! I read this to my husband and he also loved it. Reminds me of when I overheard my grandma on the phone :"Julie plays her music way too loud...and that Leo Zeppelin is the worst singer I've ever heard."
HAHAHAAHA! You've got to love that.
Meat Loaf was also in Fight Club...can't imagine how that would go over with the ladies!! I think Rocky Horror would be the safer choice.
For the next movie night you need to get a copy of Roadie, Mr. Meat Loft actually stars in that one.
This is just too funny and I can really feel it because I have a person in my household who only hears half of what is being said, and then goes on to guess the rest...makes for interesting conversations.
Rated
Nope, still nothing even with the exclamation point.

You know how much I love mom. Almost as much as I love Freaky and that's saying something. I think Mr Meat Loft should come to the retirement center and recreate his Rocky Horror scenes. That should stir some controversy. Meat Loaf indeed.
I heartily concur with the movie club watching Rocky Horror! I also agree with Cartouche, Mom is a gem and your writing about her is fabulous. I just found your blog last week and am enjoying working my way through all the Mom stories ... and those enchiladas look tasty as well!
That's so nice of you. Thank you for leaving a comment.
Your mom is a trip LMAO!