A Wretched Hive of Scum and Villainy

Your online porthole into Todd's head.

Todd Lawrence

Todd Lawrence
Location
Burnaby, British Columbia, Canada
Birthday
July 28
Bio
I am, I said.

MY RECENT POSTS

Todd Lawrence's Links

Salon.com
AUGUST 17, 2010 12:14AM

Three

My dearest Stacey,

 

It's now been three months since we last said good-night.

It's been three months since we last looked into each others' eyes, shared what would be our last kisses and made a breakfast date for the following morning; a date that would never happen.… Read full post »

Hello ----. Thank you for checking in on me.


I have not been good lately.  I don't expect to be good for a long time.

I miss her so much that I don't know what to do with myself.  I feel like I want to crawl… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
JUNE 25, 2010 12:02AM

A Lament

 

January 2001

 

 

For the past few days I have found myself obsessed with how Stacey was feeling as she died. She told me long ago that she had made peace with the idea of dying. I imagine she didn't have much choice but to… Read full post »

JANUARY 2, 2010 3:43AM

10 Resolutions for '10

1.  In 2010 I resolve to stop smoking, lose weight and quit procrastinating (starting tomorrow).

2.  In 2010 I resolve to stop answering the question: "May I please speak with Todd?" with the phrase: "You're soaking in him." every time some poor confused sucker/potential employer calls me o… Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 16, 2009 4:33PM

9/12

As we all well know, Junior Space Cadet Glenn Beck's "9/12 Project" went down in Washington D.C. this past Saturday afternoon.  Prior to this event, Beck played up the importance of this project as being an exercise in recapturing the unity, good character and American pride that "We the People"… Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 8, 2009 6:19PM

A Public Option Handled Privately.

A thought that I had while reading through and listening to the partisan screeching about the state of the U.S. health care system that has dominated discussions on the street, in the home, on the web, in the few actual newspapers still publishing on paper, between talking heads on the news,… Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 4, 2009 9:04PM

What the fuck, Texas?

For real, Texas... deep fried butter?

Why you gotta do me like that, Texas?  Maybe secession really is the answer. Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 3, 2009 3:24PM

… From my friend Leigh Bailey:

" No one should die because they cannot afford health care, and no one should go broke because they get sick. If you agree, please post this as your status for the rest of the day."

Any questions?

 

From cartouche via my Uncle Chuck. Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 3, 2009 1:30PM

Adventures in Sketch: Phase Two

NOTE:  Adventures in Sketch: Phase One can be found here. 

 

Here's another "classic" sketch from my personal files.  This bit of filthy lunacy was a collaboration between my longtime writing partner Sean Keenan and myself back in 2004:

 

 

THE "BLAMCO PARTY SHAMING KIRead full post »

SEPTEMBER 3, 2009 12:51AM

7,889,760 minutes

2009 marked the fifteenth anniversary of my maiden move to Charlotte, North Carolina.  I've lived there three separate times now and every single stay had ended badly.  Despite that, I could see myself living there again.  If the accepted definition of insanity is the act of repeating… Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 2, 2009 4:10PM

Twang.

 

Twang

 

 

I've been slowly accumulating a collection of the old 1960s-80s Wizard of Id and B.C. paperbacks from Fawcett Books.  They're by no means as easy to find these days as they have been in the past, but with a little perseverance and a willingness to do a… Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 2, 2009 2:16AM

Adventures in Sketch: Phase One

This past week, Stacey and I have been gutting our apartment and reviewing our belonging with a fine-toothed comb.  The apartment is full of bags, boxes, books, junk mail, old correspondence, classified paperwork from work, etc.  We’ve been fighting an uphill battle to reclaim ou

Read full post »

This blog contains postings titled “Adventures in Sketch”.  These posts contain sketch comedy scripts pulled from my files that were composed by myself and a variety of collaborators from my (thankfully) misspent youth writing for and performing in a regionally infamous (and now defunct)

Read full post »
SEPTEMBER 1, 2009 9:00AM

XIII


Where do we go when we die?


It seems like such a simple question, especially for the children of a Christian or Jewish household who have been told exactly where they’re headed if they don’t straighten up and fly right right now, young man.  Now eat your peas.

But

Read full post »
AUGUST 30, 2009 2:47PM

We must be cautious.


Hello and welcome. This blog will be a collection of musings, issues, stories, bad jokes, observations, diatribes, bitching, crying and all of the other stuff that one would hope makes for good reading.  I have been away from writing for quite a while now and I’m trying to start again.

Read full post »
AUGUST 30, 2009 2:47PM

We must be cautious.


Hello and welcome. This blog will be a collection of musings, issues, stories, bad jokes, observations, diatribes, bitching, crying and all of the other stuff that one would hope makes for good reading.  I have been away from writing for quite a while now and I’m trying to start again.

That

Read full post »