The Human Rights Warrior

Jennifer Prestholdt

Jennifer Prestholdt
Minneapolis, Minnesota,
February 25
Human rights lawyer, wife, and mother of three. (Not necessarily in that order.) I write about my experiences in fighting for human rights and how I am trying to bring those lessons home to my kids. Join our journey at, Humanrightswarrior on facebook and @JPrestholdt on Twitter. All material on this blog is © Jennifer Prestholdt, 2011, 2012


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FEBRUARY 24, 2012 12:35PM

My Love Affair With Patrick Stewart

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Patrick Stewart Stop VAW
"Our house was small, and when you grow up with domestic violence in a confined space you learn to gauge, very precisely, the temperature of situations. I knew exactly when the shouting was done and a hand was about to be raised – I also knew exactly when to insert a small body between the fist and her face, a skill no child should ever have to learn." 
-Patrick Stewart on The Legacy of Domestic Violence,
 The Guardian, 26 November, 2009
He had me at "Tea. Earl Grey. Hot."  In my opinion, his Jean-Luc Picard is the only Star Trek captain worthy of helming the USS Enterprise;  Picard makes Kirk and the others look like a pack of braggarts, whiners, and wimps.  For more than 20 years, my love for Patrick Stewart has burned strong and bright, "the star to every wandering bark".  A talented Shakespearean actor, Sir Patrick nails every role he plays, from Othello to Shylock to the Seattle Opera director with a crush on Frasier.  Then there's his one-man version of Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol.  I can't think of another actor who I would want to see play 40+ characters.  And let's not forget the lecherous caricature of himself that he played in Extras. Good gravy, I loved him for that!
My love for Patrick Stewart is sexless, as chaste and pure as that of the heroine in a Victorian novel.  I feel for him what the young X-Men must feel for Professor Charles Xavier - admiration, respect, passionate loyalty. It's a love, I know, not meant to be tested in real life.  Yet I can't help myself.
I've never met Patrick Stewart.  I know almost nothing of his personal life beyond the fact that he choses to use his fame to support human rights. He's been a long time supporter of Amnesty International in his native UK. I've written recommendation letters for students applying to the internship program he endowed at Amnesty.  None of them were ever selected for the Patrick Stewart Human Rights Scholarship, so I can't even claim that two-degrees of separation.
What really took me 'round the bend on Patrick Stewart, though, was his decision five or six years ago to talk about his own experience with growing up with domestic violence.  
"I experienced first-hand violence against my mother from an angry and unhappy man who was not able to control his emotions or his hands. Great harm was done by those events - and of course I mean the physical harm, the physical scars that were left, the blood that was spilled, the wounds that were exposed - but there were also other aspects of violence which have a lasting impact physiologically on family members.  It is so destructive and tainting.   
It's taken me a long time to be able to speak about what happened.  Then, two years ago, around the time of the launch of the Amnesty International campaign to  Stop Violence Against Women all that changed. After consultation with my brothers, we all felt that it was time for me to speak out about what had happened in our childhood, and to show people that domestic violence is protected by other peoples' silence." 
- Patrick Stewart, Turning the Tide, 
Domestic violence is a worldwide epidemic.  It cuts across race and class and economic status and nation of origin.  It violates the fundamental human rights of women and often results in serious injury or death. Studies show that between one quarter and one half of all women in the world have been abused by intimate partners.  Certainly men experience domestic violence as well, but women are victims of violence in approximately 95% of cases of domestic violence. (For sources and more statistics, see

It took the human rights community far too long to recognize domestic violence and other gender-based rights as human rights abuses.  Because the violence is committed by private actors rather than the government in the context of family life, domestic violence was long considered to be a "private matter".  Fortunately, the international human rights law has progressed and violence against women is now considered a  human rights abuse.  The government has a responsiblity to prevent violence against women from taking place and to prosecute or punish the perpetrators of the violence.  The UN Committee Against Torture has even clarified that violence agains women, including domestic violence, can in certain circumstances be defined as torture under the Convention Against Torture.
Implementation of laws that protect women from domestic violence is, of course, the ongoing problem throughout the world. 
It is never easy for survivors of human rights abuses to talk about the violence they experienced.  It comes at great personal expense and sometimes that expense is just too great for people to overcome.  There has been a lot of outrage recently about Rihanna and Chris Brown. I wish Rihanna would become an advocate against domestic violence -photographed holding an Amnesty International placard - but I can't judge her or the decisions she makes about her life. It does make me think, though, that it is doubly important for male celebrities like Patrick Stewart to use their fame as a platform to raise awareness about violence against women.  
I defy you to watch this video and then tell me my love for Patrick Stewart is wrong.
What will it take to end domestic violence worldwide?  It will take more than Sir Patrick Stewart.  As he says in this Amnesty video, it will take sustained government action to ensure that domestic violence is treated as a public health issue rather than a private matter.  But Patrick Stewart's decision to use his celebrity to speak out about the domestic violence experienced in his childhood home puts us one step farther along that road. 
"Violence against women diminishes us all.  If you fail to raise your hand in protest, then you make yourself part of the problem."   
- Patrick Stewart, Turning the Tide,
Amnesty Magazine, May/June 2006 
"I do it for my mother because I could not help her very much then."
-Patrick Stewart on BBC's HARDtalk, 24 January 2012
Stop Violence Against Women. 
 "Make it so."

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Thanks for this post... watched the interview and it's a bit like looking into a mirror... more later.

In one of the articles I read, Patrick Stewart also made a comment about looking in a mirror and seeing his father. He channeled it into one of his roles. Looking forward to seeing how you channel it, OMoM. Thanks for reading and thanks for your comment!
I didn't know about Patrick Stewart's work with Amnesty International, nor his past experiences with domestic violence. Thank you for sharing this. ....Now I feel guilty that my celebrity crush, Jude Law in the Dior Homme perfume ad, is only a crush because he talks sexy......
You shouldn't feel guilty, Alysa. Jude Law was the one who was supposed to be on Extras but he had to pull out. So Patrick Stewart filled in for him at the last minute and won an award for the role. (I forgot to mention that Stewart is also involved in Refuge, a British organization that works with survivors of domestic violence.)
How did I not know about this? I just LOVE that photo of him holding the sign. I grew up in a household of violence, too, like way too many of us. What a man. What a lovely, lovely man.
I now have even more liking for the man. He is a wonderful actor.

Did you see him on the Graham Norton show a couple of weeks ago? It was funny. You might be able to see it online, if you missed it.
Firechick, BINGO! "What a lovely, lovely man" is the perfect way of saying it. Best wishes to you and yours!

Phyllis, I didn't catch the Graham Norton show but I will look for it. The BBC HARDtalk interview is on the website (and lovely), if you follow the link. Not on youtube yet so I couldn't post it as a video. Thank you for your comment!
It's not wrong. It's very, very right. Good on you, Mr. Stewart. Thank you for speaking out in order to help others.

And yes, he was the best captain the Enterprise ever had. I always knew I liked him!

Agreed! Thanks, Shiral, for reading and commenting!
Sorry for having missed this earlier, Jennifer, thank you for bringing up a very important issue. I've always had a deep respecful liking for Sir Patrick Stewart. He makes an excellent spokesman on the subject.
No apologies necessary, Fusun! As always, thank you for reading and best wishes.
Jennifer, thanks so much for sharing this.

I grew up in a mill town (well, village) in Pennsylvania. My grandfathers were coal miners (slaves, actually). They drank and beat my grandmothers. One day I was walking with my grandmother and we stopped to talk to another lady here age who lived on my street. As we walked away, my grandmother said, "She is SO happy since her husband died!"

Patrick Stewart is a magnificent actor. He was my long-time crush, and the co-star in my best sex dream ever, in which he was wearing only a white undershirt. Ahhhhh.

Now I love him even more!
Love it, Wren Dancer! I hope you write about your grandmothers' experience. Thanks for reading and commenting.