I’ve been disappointed in our reader’s response to my well written and thoughtful plea as to why you need to watch The Real World. Well, here is my second attempt to convince you. Tell me what this word does for you when you hear it. Douchebag(whispered). Oh you didn’t here me? Let me clear my throat. DOUCHEBAG. Yep, we got one here on this season of The Real World. His name is Trey.
As you all know, I am deeply invested in this season of The Real World and boy have I found my guy to dislike strongly. Allow me to catch you up on what you have missed out from our buddy Trey. He likes to work out and yes I might be slightly jealous of his body but that has no bearing on my declaration of his douchebagery. I’ve got you intrigued now don’t I. Well let’s dive deep into this guy’s shenanigans.
No worries, I’m pretty proficient in identifying douchebag symptoms. (Pause to allow the “Take’s one to know one” jokes to ensue). Back to the case at hand, our friend Trey, guilty as charged of being a D-bag. Our first example of his DBT (douchebag tendencies) was his uppity attitude about the roommates lack thereof cleanliness. He’s very passive aggressive with most confrontations and the dirty house was not exempt. What did he do to fix the mess? Post a note on the the kitchen island saying “Keep me clean”. Problem solved right? Negative ghost rider. The roomies proceed to smear peanut butter all over the island in rebellion. Victory! The worst part about Trey in this scenario was his need to parade around the house talking about how clean he was. That’s like a person having to say they are funny and seeking validation. If people laugh when you say things you are funny, no need to qualify. Same with clean folk, you know if a person is clean or dirty based on their lifestyle. “Guys, I am really clean and this mess is out of control.” DBT number 1. It only gets better from here so please follow along.
Trey has a lady friend in cast member Laura. She follows him around like a sickly puppy waiting for a moment of attention to be paid. In my opinion Trey probably thinks it’s an honor for a girl to be in his presence and Laura’s insecurity only feed’s his DBT. Important side note here, Trey has a GIRLFRIEND back at home. he may not call her his girlfriend but his manipulative word choice leads me to believe she is much more than “just another girl” in his life. Ready for the kicker? Trey turns into a jealous gorilla type caveman when Laura even thinks about flirting with another guy. “I can’t believe you would do this to me. I thought we were more than this.” She then breaks down into tears confused as shit because he has yet to define what “they” are, but is ready to hurl insults at her and her new dance partner. He cuts the guy really deep too, ” That guy? You’re ugly man!” Easy there killer. Pretty sure Tommy Boy has wittier comebacks than our DB buddy.
He continues to torment Laura with phrases like, “I don’t want to end this, I just think we need to slow things down.” Translation, I want to talk to you and enjoy your curvy body whilst on the island so I won’t be on too long of a drought. After hours of arm waving, frantic pacing, and uttering things to Laura like, ” You did this to me!”, he lays this smooth line on her. “Laura the ball is back in your court about us, if you want to be something it’s on you.” WHAT THE HELL!!! This guy is about as cool as a bag of dicks. How is any of this Laura’s fault and why is she the one who needs to make this crucial decision? Obviously this is where my frustration with his DBT peaked. I was miffed at how he was able to manipulate this girl so easily. Let me remind you, all his arguments were made with a black wife beater and pirate hat on his head. Jonny Cochran had it all wrong.
I hope you dislike this person too. Otherwise I have really made myself vulnerable for no reason. Or I made a complete ass of myself for caring WAY to much about a guy on a reality TV show on MTV. I’ve never been a fan of apathy in any circumstance, so yes I will continue to roll my eyes several times and throw my arms up when Trey speaks. Watch the next episode and see first hand his DBT. For the record I would never hang out with this guy if I was on the show and I would probably use a passive aggressive method to let him know how I felt about him. Maybe an anonymous note?
He might have found out two episodes ago that he could be a father to be to his “lady friend” back home. NBD.