TheWiseGuise

TheWiseGuise
Location
Memphis/Nashville, Tennessee, United States
Birthday
April 10
Company
www.thewiseguise.com
Bio
What The Wise Guise is meant to be is a place for us to get together and discuss the things we love and are passionate about, in a hopefully entertaining way. Think of it as a virtual MacLaren’s Pub, The Max, or Monk’s Café. We each love writing. We each have a propensity to become addicted to varied corners of culture. So we figured… why not join forces?! Think Super 8, where Spielberg, Abrams, Coach Eric Taylor, and the sassiest adolescents since The Sandlot joined forces. We don’t want to create another website full of people who think they have all the answers about everything from comprehensive tax reform and college football to TV quality and Kardashian cup sizes (the latter two not always being mutually exclusive). We’re not the Huffington Post. The Wise Guise is merely a place for us to post some opinions and observations, while collecting your feedback. The name “The Wise Guise” derives from the idea that so many bloggers feel the need to assert their self proclaimed expertise. They try to give the appearance of wisdom when, more often than not, they just use controversy to get their name out there. We have no “unnamed” sources and again, we don’t claim to be experts. We come more from the line of people who wish they were experts but have real jobs. Well, some of us have real jobs… sometimes. You can also follow us on Twitter @TheWiseGuise!

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AUGUST 24, 2012 9:30AM

Ladies and Gentlemen…THUNDERSTRUCK!!!

Rate: 0 Flag

 

Thunderstruck Ladies and Gentlemen...THUNDERSTRUCK!!!

I’ve established myself pretty well as a movie nerd. I don’t hide it or deny it. So when I stumbled upon a little ditty a couple months ago called Thunderstruck, I was ecstatic. I planned to do a blog post immediately but decided it needed to be as thorough as possible. I mean, when this thing hits theaters today, it has the potential to be the second greatest movie starring an athlete! (Editor’s note: Number one is obviously Kazaam.)

Kazaam Shaq Magic Ladies and Gentlemen...THUNDERSTRUCK!!!

Take a quick peak at the trailer so that you’ll understand the plot.

Okay, so once you’ve written a script that you think can surpass Kazaam, what do you do? GET THE BEST DIRECTOR ON THE MARKET! So the good folks at Warner Premiere (Warner Brothers direct-to-video division) get none other than John Whitesell.

John Whitesell Ladies and Gentlemen...THUNDERSTRUCK!!!

A quick gander at his resume removes any question as to why he was the natural choice for the job. He is due for a breakout movie. Let the haters hate.

His first film was Calender Girl. It was directed by both John Whitesell and John P. Whitesell according to Rotten Tomatoes. This one came during his sophisticated phase. It’s rotten tomatoes score? 0%.

Then he does a half hour Clarissa Explains it All made for TV movie special called Clarissa.

This obviously gains him notoriety and he lands See Spot Run. Critics didn’t bite. 23% clearly not including Nell.

Screen shot 2012 08 23 at 10.50.12 PM Ladies and Gentlemen...THUNDERSTRUCK!!!Back to the drawing board.

Next shot? Malibu’s Most Wanted. 30%!!! We’re climbing! Let’s see what snobby Nell had to say…

Screen shot 2012 08 23 at 10.52.32 PM Ladies and Gentlemen...THUNDERSTRUCK!!!

OH MY GOODNESS CAN ANYONE TRULY PLEASE NELL?

Boom Big Momma’s House 2! Nell?

Screen shot 2012 08 23 at 10.54.33 PM Ladies and Gentlemen...THUNDERSTRUCK!!!

Deck the Halls

Screen shot 2012 08 23 at 10.57.13 PM Ladies and Gentlemen...THUNDERSTRUCK!!!Big Mommas: Like Father, Like Son… Our friend Nell didn’t even bother.

This leads us to Thunderstruck. Our protagonist’s latest attempt to win Nell’s respect.

At this point there are only four reviews and Nell wasted no time.

Screen shot 2012 08 23 at 11.02.05 PM Ladies and Gentlemen...THUNDERSTRUCK!!!

Say what you will but I’m pumped for this dreamboat of a film. The following is a message from John and I.

Hi Haters Ladies and Gentlemen...THUNDERSTRUCK!!!

 

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