Today is Diwali, the Hindu festival of lights. Separated as I am, from the "mother" culture, and the community that observes such holidays here, I realized that the day is near only about a week ago.

There are many web sites out there that describe the religious, cultural, and business significance of the day. So I won't go into that.

Rather, I feel like writing about the two aspects of Diwali that mean the most to me and that I am missing today.

 One is rangoli, the art of adorning the home by drawing patterns and coloring them in. The other is bhau beej - the day I interpreted for my kids as "sibling day" - the day for celebrating the bond between brothers and sisters.

As a kid I loved drawing rangoli (a new one for each of the 4-5 days of Diwali) on the small veranda of my house. When I was younger,  I drew small patterns (6-10 dots per row/column) that required only straight lines. As I grew older, I drew more complex motifs - 30 dots square and using curved lines.   

I tried drawing rangoli on the porch of my house (in America). The cold October winds blew the colors away. Not to be maudlin, but a metaphor nonetheless for connections and traditions cast to the wind. 

The video below is about the festival of rakhi, a different holiday that also celebrates the brother-sister bond. The video does a wonderful job of portraying the love that the sister feels for her brother and the joy she feels as she prepares to welcome him to her home.

The custom was that the brother visited the sister, because it would be difficult for her to get away, given all her family responsibilities and obligations. He would give her a gift - something that would be hers and hers alone.

At a time when women were not independent and did not have their own income, this gesture signified much. Sympathy for her situation, acknowledgment that her birth family had not forgotten her, that the brother would look out for her even after the parents were no more.

My mother was an only child. Her cousins (brothers once removed, as they are considered in Indian culture) made it a point to visit her on this day, just as they did their "real" sisters.    

"Don't forget your sister. The string I tie on your wrist is as delicate as breath, and it cannot be broken as long as there is life. If there comes a day when I live in a faraway land, light a lamp to remember me by.... " 

I remain hopeful that as they settle into adulthood, my daughter and son will find their way back to this tradition.  

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Pres. Obama observed Diwali and lit the Diwali lamp in the White House. Turns out the tradition was started during Bush II, although Bush himself never attended the celebrations.

 I feel oddly unmoved by either news story. I didn't really expect more from Bush II. And I am not particularly surprised that Obama is an active participant. 

But, this is an empty gesture - in my eyes anyway. I feel that all such observances are mere lip service to make sure each vote bloc feels relevant and attended to.

I would much rather Obama recognized the solemnity of the times in which we live and acted in courageous ways, taking on the powers-that-be, be it the insurance lobby or Wall Street, to ensure the welfare of all the citizens whose hopes rest in his audacity.

I wish it was  less about hyphenated identities and more about universal challenges.  

The real spirit of Diwali is: Lead us from Falsehood to Truth; from Darkness to Light.

Slum children in Hyderabad