Hey everyone, how are you doing?
I'm doing great! Thanks for asking. I was going to try to steal away some of the 10,000 readers of RicTresa, King of the Banner Makers, because he made a direct challenge to me to try and do it in a private message.
He was like, "DO IT!! I DARE YOU!!"
And I wrote back, "I WILL!! YOU JUST WATCH!!" but I discovered I have no skillz with PhotoShop(how do you install this thing? What are these little silver disks for? Frisbees? Who the hell wants to play Frisbee when they're trying to install software!!!?? GOD!!!!!)
I was sitting here at work thinking, "You know Tink, instead of trying to Photoshop Ric's head on top of a stripper's body, maybe you should plan the world's greatest Open.Salon gathering and flea market(I figured I'd add that so maybe micalpeace and others could sell stuff there!! Remember, hot coco and brownies seem to sell well!!!) this side of Cleveland!!!"
And so I did! I began the planning of the gathering, which is starting to turn into a full blown media presentation hosted by Fox News and maybe, if we're lucky, Glenn Beck!!!
I even set a date, January 22nd, 2010!! it's a Friday and if we get wild and crazy, maybe January 23rd, 2010, just in case our peckers fall off we'll have time to heal for the ending of us all, hand in hand, singing "We are the World".
Can you imagine it? Joan Walsh holding hands with Glenn Beck singing, "We are the world!!! WOOOOO!!" or Abba's Winner Takes All. Either or, at the end, they hug and then for just that moment, there's peace, in North Dakota!!
That's all I want for Christmas. One day of peace. And I figure if Glenn Beck and Joan Walsh would french kiss each other, well, I could probably get the Middle East to group f*ck!!
So folks, circle your calendars, we'll meet up around 3 AM, especially the guys. We'll wear our swimming trunks and nothing else.
And in case you missed it, s0me more wonderful things about the great state of North Dakota!!! As dictated by a drunken Tink.
Hurray for rubbing alcohol!
And in case you're still not sold, please watch the below videos ---
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Comments
second.. you arent even from ND!
third.. joan can do better than glen beck..
2nd off, in my heart, I'm from North Dakota, land of Lawerence Welk!! Pfffffft!!!
3rd, it's not a matter of her being able to do better, but world peace!!!! *grin*
So woooo!!! Barbra anne will be there with bells on!!!!! Woooo!!!
Be just like my senior prom night only it won't be my cousin drugged up and in the car trunk!! WOOOO!!! :)
CRAP!! ;)
Oh adn don't forget to have extra chairs and pub tents. (John and OReally will need their own) I'm bringing playing cards, M&M's and baby oil . . oh yeah and my CAMERA!
I haven't even read your post yet, but I'm tired of missing out.
Okay...going back....
Xmas day? 3am? Swimming trunks? I'll try to be there....
;-)
nice banner by the way...is that new? ;)
Numerous tents and such, each labeled appropiately!! :)
nana, I think I can do that!! Maybe. I'll try!!!!!!!! If I can't, I'll buy youse a drink, ahhh hell, I'll buy ya drinks anyways!! ;)
CK, that's okay, we'll grab you and your grandson too!!! He'll be like "Grandma!! Best Birthday party EVER!!!" ;) No, no need to thank me!! ;)
spotted, it's okay!! I do that sometimes too, get my comment in and then read the article! Easier that way!! ;) Bring some tables and cabana boys when you show up!! :)
LadyMike, The Fargo Holiday Inn has already been notified and will be providing cake, 10 different kind, with a lot more options inside!! :)
Trig, I know, I was shocked too, least visited? MY GOODNESS!! ;) I hope Joan sees this and Glenn does too. I so want world peace for my Christmas present.
With a bottle of whiskey just in case the peace doesn't come!! :-(
~grin~
I'm trying to get enough Republicans to show up, so we each will get some, you know, love!! :)
JK Brady, damn, I don't know if I'll have enough trunk space to get folks who seem to have previvious engagements for this thing.
But for you, my General, I'll let you ride inside the car, maybe a truck, if I have too many folks trying to cancel.
I know the rope seems kinky, but hey, we both know, that's how "Open" rolls!!
And yes, a new banner!!! Like months ago but thanks for noticing!!! I love you!! No matter what the nice guys in the lab coats say, I don't think you're THAT crazy!! :)
;)
(Did I say dead center? That sounds needlessly morbid, but you know what I mean.)
and i'd love to come but only if you promise: no abba. [herk]
:-|
femme, no Abba!! Check you off as being there!! :)
Luis, there will be plenty of the booze, so check on you being there and in the shorts!!! But there won't be any Abba, but hey, We are the World is better anyways!! Glenn by the way is confirmed!! Come on Joan!!
WE ARE THE WORLD!! *SINGING* ;) (Shhh, I lied, Glenn so far is a no go, but Fox News will be there!! WOOOO!!)
Sally, no jest!! Perfect time. Show the true nature of North Dakota. It'll be fun!!! ;)
O'Really? That's the spirit!! Man, this is going to be one awesome gathering!!!! And I got a DJ too, his name is Scooter!!!! Look him up on YouTube!! Teeheehee!!
spotted_mind, alright!! That's the spirit, there will be plenty of folks to do there. Nothing better to do in North Dakota in the middle of winter, and it's an activity to keep you warm!! ;)
Ric, yep, real cake!!! With plenty of frosting. *nodding* It's going to be a kick ass party. :)
old new lefty, sure is!!! Well, okay, no, it's pretty close though, if you change Mexico to Canada!!!!! ;)
scanner, alright!! I've got the booze and dope already, Canada isn't just there for looks my friend!!!! Best dope the Russians can make(come out of) the ass of a Germanic goat!!!
Outside Myself, of course they do!! North Dakota was declared by Ice Cube Weekly as #1 place to go if you want to see ice in its natural surrounding.
I know, awesome right? TOTALLY!!! :)
LadyMiko, see, that's an excellent idea!! Wet t-shirt contests!! Be like spring break only, much f*cking colder!! ~nodding~ :)
Andy, HI!! *waving* ;)
littlewillie, I knew I could count on you!!! ;)
Why does it smell like dead decaying roses with the tinge of broken dreams in here?
EEK!! :-( ~grin~
I Hope to be there if I can wear my Fargo Gunpowder Falls - Bison two-piece fur-bikini.
There is a Gunpowder bison meat company on the East Coast. You
may wish to google?
Ya can buy t-bones,
dry bison jerky sticks,
BBQ spare (anorexic) ribs,
oregano sprinkle prime rib,
and be real American People,
Yea! rational goat milk drunks.
Tink seems tipsy from raw sheep milk.
Goat milk causes 24/7 stupor drowsiness.
I followed the flying looking bagel who rated Ya!
It wasn't Lady Miko. It was the One with a cool Mom!
Let's all bring sheep cheese and dry bubbly champagne?
My neighbors make a great brie cow cheese with blue grey mold.
I Hope Lady Miko forgets to take her camera cover off the lens!
Let's wear wool mitten? Rub Bee Balm in lieu of rubbing alcohol?
Then we can rub each other down and blog critiques about bodies? There is so much to say about people who have cute belly buttons! So - We have one?
Smear Bee Balm?
Bee Balm heal hole.
Buy Bee Balm cans.
Buy Bee Balm today.
Sold at Flea Markets.
Google Moo - Bee Balm.
Ride a Ferris Wheel too.
The last blind date I had?
She's from North Dakota.
She's 10- months pregnant.
I'll bring her if it's allowable.
okay? Maybe her H2O breaks.
I Hope it breaks on a Ferris wheel.
She's shy. She wears a pink bikini.
I think Tink may fall in love with her.
I Hope Lady Miko can divorce` Tink.
See Ya in bikini's in North De'cooties.
Gads. It's gonna be a goofy gathering!
Ya say hello ta, North Dakota
Where the sky's a bluier blue
The sun is sunnier too
Ya say hello ta, North Dakota
And you just can't say good-bye.
Yes you may, and bring your preggo girlfriend, we can only hope she'll give birth then, and we'll name the baby something cool like Kerry Joan Thomas!!! Boy or a girl, it doesn't matter, the name fits!!
And bison!! Bring the bison!! I had a few bison burgers and they were nummy!!! :)
Of course, as a tourist destination, especially in the dead of winter, well, North Dakota is.....#1!!! ;)
Now maybe if you change the meeting place to New Orleans then we can talk.
R
R
for naughtiness
I'm up for the party. I will bring my own party of unemployeds for fuel.
Torman, so adding you to the list of kidnapping and bringing up to North Dakota!! Gotcha!! ;)
Leonde, durn it, it has to be North Dakota, geological or something center of the U.S. Next gathering will be in Mexico, I promise. I know some folks down there big ranch, lots of places to hide out from the government, I mean, party!! :)
C.K. but New Orleans has that restraining order against me. 100 yards, pfffft!! ;)
sagemerlin, you must have been reading my 'to be posted' article on the greatest state in the Union, that state being Dellusion. But then I have on Indiana.
We can't meet in Indiana, too many dairy cows which I call Indiana horses which pisses off my wife and wooooweee let the running begin when she gets pissed!!
~nodding in agreement~ I actually like the Badlands of ND, been through on a hot summer day and the colors were just awesome.
John, awesome!! Now I too will have skillzzzz! ;)
Z Bitch, THAT'S THE SPIRIT!! Wooooooo!! :)
Shan, see, that's what I'm hoping for. I've sent invites to all them countries leaders. So far, Pakistan and India have sent resounding YES!!!! Iran has said maybe, but only if they can bring their WIIs for some 'Ass kicking Mario style' I replied, OH HELL YEA!!!
Most of the Europeans stated, "Only if France stays away..." but France said they would make it, and I sooooo need some bubbly so....:)
Chris, alllllright!! This is going to be one hell of a party!!!!!
and those disks are coasters! they're like those sponges kids buy to watch them unfold. put it in the microwave so you can see the pretty secret patterns!
Barbra, another benefit of not having kids!! Teeheehee!! ;)
Now, on to party planning. I think you are better at the gather rather than the planning. No harm intended.
I'm with C.K. February with Mardi Gras seems much more likely to gather my attention.
What is so funny, is I think you mean this as a joke and I think it sounds like a really fun idea! But, ND, in JANUARY? Dear God, if I must, I will be there for you Tink. No shit (and that wasn't a pun).
And who is attending please make a list a post it so we can have a big flame war over it!