Dear readers, those of you who have been there since the beginning of my adventure started sometime last week, know that first there was Glads, who I think may be dead or just onto my little quick love fest and Esther, who seemingly was all fun and games until I stepped into her plot line but now, her script is in shamble, she does not know where to go, so she resorts to this day's episode of Wha?

WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS MAIL ???????

--- On Thu, 6/3/10, Ho Chi Minh <hochi69@hotmail.com> wrote:

From: Ho Chi Minh <hochi69@hotmail.com>
Subject: RE: WITH LOVE FROM ESTHER
To: "Esther BabyOPEN411" <esther_baby2009@yahoo.com>
Date: Thursday, June 3, 2010, 4:12 PM

My dearest Esther, I was just thinking about you, as I laid there in my bed, just for a few minutes, wishin' youse was here lying next to me, so we could kissy kissy before I had to go out to the fields to start plowing. This year we're plantin' sugar beets and mushrooms so mama can make some of her sugar beet mushroom pies!! You haven't eaten food till you had mama's sugar beet mushroom pies!!!!
 
My health is preddy good except the whole bladder control problem and well, I have this thing where my left knee is where my right knee should be, doctors call it Displacement of the Central Ecalaca!!! Also, I can't hear or see too well, since my own accident with inseminating a bull. Man, them bulls sure don't like being inseminated!
 
I tried calling that number you gave me but either my fingers misdialed or my phone don't like all them digits, I ended up calling what I think was a bank, I said, "Howdy, my name is Ed and is Esther there?"  And they were like, "We's don't know no Esther!"  I said, "She said this was her number and to call her! We's fallin' in loves!" and the guy was like, "Ahh that is sweet.  I know an Ethel, but no Esther!"  I tried again and if'n I didn't reach the same guy, he was like, "Would you like to talk to Ethel?" So I's did and if'n Ethel sound preddy. We talked for hours, she said her daddy was killed by rebels in Nigeria someplace and he hads a whole lot of money sitting in some bank in London that she couldn't get to because she said she didn't have no way to travel to London and get the money.
 
That story just broke my heart Esther, she was so sincere. She said there was like 20 million dollars US just a sitting there waiting to be claimed and if'n it wasn't, it be gobbled up by the government!!! I was so heart broken and such, I said, "I knows I only have talked to you for like 2 hours but I feel like I known you forever!! What can I do to help?"
 
She was first like all "No, no, no, I'll figure something out...." but the more we talked, the more she broke down and said, "I could use your help!"  She told me that she knew a guy in London named Hermen and he had some pull in the banking industry, he was like some big shot, and ifn I could buy her a ticket to London, we's could meet up there and get that money.  She said, I could just Western Union her the moneys, like a 1000 dollars, and she could buy the ticket cause that way, it wouldn't stir up the government on this side of the Atlantic and I wouldn't end up on a terrorist watch list.
 
So I just got done wiring her the money and bought my own ticket to London, England, where I will meet up with Hermen and Ethel Friday afternoon at a coffee shop Hermen likes to drink at, it's called a Pub or something. I know everything is going really quick, but I just couldn't let that poor woman suffer no more.  She told me about the refugee camp she's in, and the only access to the outside world she has is this reverend Tim or Jim Jones or something like. He's right nice, she says, but she wants to live the life of a princess she once did when her father, King JuJuHanaHana was alive.  I don't right blame her.
 
Ethel said if this works out, I'll be taking a lot of dollars back to the states with me.  She told me she will wear a yellow rose in her hair so I will recognize her but also sent me a picture so I wills knows it really is her, which I have attached.  The next time youse hear from me I'll be a rich man who can afford to rightly court you and wins youse heart and possibly marry ya in the tradition we see fit.  I thinks youse a pretty. 
 
My sister she says you looks like you about 11 or 12, but I told her, in your country, womens don't age that fast, so when youse was like 80, you'd only look like youse was fifty.  I hopes you don't mind that I showed you pictures off to my family. Family means a whole lot to me, I want a big family, lots of children and whens we get olds and almost dead, lots of grand children and great grand children, to take the family name of Fartes into the future.
 
So until the next time we speak, I am forever yours kissy kissy in the eyes of our Lord, Hank Williams,
 
Ed

---

Oh how can Ed tell her the meaning when he has no idea himself. Ethel, Hermen and Ed have met up in London(England, not Kentucky!!!), and well, Ethel has tried to make a move on Ed. GASP!

So far, Ed hasn't written the email to her, Esther, but is now in the process.

I wasn't going to write her, I felt too bad, could I really tell her what I did, to Ethel, in that hotel room in London?

I guess I could....

---

Dearest Esther,
 
I have a tale to tell you, hopefully you will understand. My last email was pretty detailed, and I was hoping you would understand, but I guess you didn't, I made it to London as detailed in my previous email, it was a pleasent flight, the air line stewardess gave me two bags of nuts and a bag of pretzel.  And a full can of Pepsi, which was very nice of her.
 
I landed in London and met Ethel, the woman who I talked to at the number you gave me in your last email.  She seemed nice, looked like just like her picture.  We headed to the hotel room, she had enough money left over from the money I sent her to acquire a room in a semi-seedy section of London.  She said it was all she could afford but we would be able to acquire a nicer room once we got the money from the bank.  We were suppose to go today, Friday, but my flight was delayed by a few hours and therefore, we would have to wait till Monday, most dubious indeed, I know.
 
I know you are confused and are wondering what is going on, it is going way too quickly, I know,  but please bare with me, as I try to explain.  I just discovered that Ms. Ethel is a scam artist.  She doesn't have any connections to any bankers here in London and is just using me to get more money.  
 
While walking around the town, I was approached by three men, all wearing black suits, all flashed badges for the International Crime Fighters of the World(ICFW) and said, that Ethel and Hermen were part of a world wide crime organization, they tell people that their mama or papa are dead and they have leads to millions of dollars in some bank somewhere, and then they sucker these fellows into giving them money, and a few of these fellows are stupid enough to meet up with them.  Well, Ms. Esther, if I wasn't scared more than any fella I ever known, but the ICFW gave me a gun and said, "We'll be close by, if'n any trouble come up, you just shoot em and be a big hero!!!"
 
So I went back to the hotel room and if'n Ethel wasn't a dressed in her finest undies. She said, "Why don't you come here baby, and show me how much you like to kissy kissy!" WEll, I did what every hero a does when faced by such a scene, I wet myself, then pulled out my gun and said, "I loves Ms. Esther!" 
 
She looked at me in horror.  She screamed, "Ms. Esther is a scammer!!! I got proof!!!"
 
I cried out, "No!! You are!! The police told me!!!" She ran towards me, I pulled the trigger, three times, she fell to the ground, gasping out, "Ed...I only...wanted to....make you....happy!!" and then died at my feet.
 
I was so sad, Ms. Esther, so very sad, I cried real tears, still am.  I found this laptop in Ethel's suit case and the hotel, though very rat infested, has a great Internet connection, so I decided I would write to you. And after reading your last email, I think I made the proper choice in writing you, I hope you understand, everything I'm doing, I'm doing for you.
 
I have to go now, police want to bring me down to the police station, I won't give them your name or tell them you gave me the phone number that got me in connection with Ethel, I'm tell them I found it on some bulletin board on the Internet, they'll believe that,
 
IF I never speak to you again, my dearest Esther, always remember, I's loves you,
 
In God's true name,  Waylon Jennings,
 
I's ur 4ever,
 
Ed. 

---

Is this the last episode of Wha? Only Esther can make that decision. There's talk to make it into a full blown movie with Megan Fox as Esther and a CGI penguin as Ed.

We'll see.

Till then,

Good night and have a better tomorrow.......