I saw her from across the room, mistified in the acidic rank smoke from the demented souls sitting around the bar, with their cheap cigars and even cheaper booze.

The ladies and men of the bar, the usuals, sat tight against the well worn bar, drinking themselves out of this world and into something called heaven, or death, whichever came first.

For most, it would be death, a slight tinge of pain from somewhere in their body one day, they'd just order another whiskey or whatever and move on, till one day, they couldn't move.

She'd be there, watching, from across the room.  

No one noticed her there, watching, but I did.

She was a puzzle wrapped into a ham sandwich shoved into a hot dog for me.   

The jukebox, tucked away into the corner of the bar, would keep playing, like it always did, those sad songs, with such lyrics as "He stopped loving her today" or "There's a tear in my beer from crying over you..." or "Dancing Queen...."

Sometimes "Bubba shot the jukebox, last night, said it played a sad song that made him cry...." but only on Wednesdays. 

Dollar drafts.

Everyone had a sad story to tell, lost love, love found and then discovered it wasn't good.

She even had a tale to tell, or twenty.  She was there most nights, waiting, silently, the drift of the lights changing her appearence from saintly to devilish in a mere seconds of a single moment.

I fell in love with her every night again.  She was my queen, and most nights, I would ask her to dance, in that smoked fill bar, somewhere, and most nights she'd nod, and we would lead each other to the dance floor, like it was part of the script in some horrible movie from the 1950s.

'Last Tango in Trenton! Starring Dirk Johnson and Mary Lohansen in a film made to tell the story that was never meant to be told!'

One night, I asked her name, and she smiled, a smile I knew meant trouble, but it aroused me strangely.

"Demonia" she whispered closely to my ear, her breath sweeping down my neck, sending goose bumps down my body.  I kissed her neck softly, my hands running down her body, pulling her closer to mine.

She pushed back, away from me.  "I...I can't!" and she rushed out of the bar, a phantom of her sweet perfume still drifting around me, embracing me, pulling me further into the dream of this place.

Every night, I would make it back and she wasn't there.  I asked the bartender if he had seen her.  He shook his head.  I was sad.

Sad wasn't even the right word to be used. I walked the streets, tears, a broken man, the lyrics that came out from the goddamn jukebox.

Was this the end?

Was this the spot where the credits rolled and the screen went black and the last words, 'fin' appeared?

FIN

No, this isn't the end, only the beginning! It's like one of those highly hyped but highly crappy art films you see and you wonder,

"Why didn't he realize that Demonia was really The Angel of Death, waiting for him to die but she was actually falling in love with him too but well, she couldn't go through with it cause if she did, she'd lose her wings or something and Nicolas Cage would have to step in as the angel of death and well, he already did that whole 'City of Angels'  and well, we just can't go with that!"

TAKE A BREATH!

I know, too many unanswered questions.  The director should be shot.

This is the real beginning of this piece, it is about love discovered, and then lost again, cause well, I'm a little too fast with the promise of kissy kissy.

And a premature ejaculator!!!!  Hi to all my friends who think I share too much information. No, you don't have to sign up for an account to tell me that, I already know.

The email came on a warm, some w0uld say even, hot day in June.  It was a good day to open my email.

Hello,
How are you today?,I hope you are fine.If so thank be to God almigthy.my name is Anna johnson,23 years from Liberia in Africa. I am single girl looking for honest and nice person.Somebody who care and fear God whom i can partner with .I don't care about your colour or ethnicity.I would like to know you more,most especially what you like and what you slike.I'm sending you this beautiful mail, with a wish for much happiness.
I am looking forward to hear from you, again.
Thanks and be blessed.
Love from,
Anna.

Oh Anna, my new found potential love.  I write back to her, my hands sweaty, shaking, what if she doesn't write back to me? I  would be...well, I'd just find someone else I guess.

From: Ho Chi Minh

To: Hot New Lover

Subject: Re: hi

Hello!!
 
I am well today, thanks for asking.  I am Ed Fartes, 27 from Crawfish, Kentucky. I am single just out for a good time and lots of kissy kissy!
 
I like to run naked through my town.
 
How about you?
 
Attached, find my picture,
 
Ed

Would she respond? Would my love write to me? I would sit and hold my breath until she did!  (TINK NOTE: I would like to thank Open.Salon especially Ed I Tor for beginning this adventure for me, for whom without I would have never gotten an email from Glads or whatever the hell her name was who then sold my email address to the Director of Financial Services of the Bank of United Kingdom and whom without I would have never gotten an email from my sweet Anna!! Thank you!! I owe you a beer.  You drink beer right? The last few Eds only drank tea and drank it with their pinkies held out like a bunch of sissies!!!!!! )

She responded. (in a eye pleasing light blue!!!)

Date: Wed, 16 Jun 2010 05:10:17 +0800
From: annjohnsonjj@yahoo.com.my
Subject: Happiness and love
To: hochi69@hotmail.com

My Dearest Ed,
 
How are you over there in your country(TINK NOTE: I'm doing swell, the country of Akabamadoodoo is a prosperous country!!!),i believe you had a nice time(TINK NOTE: Nice time indeed! You were a naughty little girl and watched my web cam didn't you?) and that the arthmosphere over there in your country is very nice today? (TINK NOTE: No, the Arthmosphere is very bad, Arth hasn't washed the mosphere in many days!! Bad Arth!!!!) Mine was a little bit warm over here in Dakar Senegal I thank you for your reply to my mail despite your busy schedules(TINK NOTE: Very busy! But never too busy for you my sweet!! Teeheehee!! Lick you like a lollipop!! Teeheehee! Make your bed rock!! Woooooo Woooo!!! Keep you open all night like a IHOP!! Gawd, I shouldn't listen to the radio while writing these notes!!!).A good personality and great conversation tends to keep one straight in a young relationship like ours.I would appreciate if you could give me an elaborate introduction of yourself(TINK NOTE: Not liking the cock when you have a cock keeps one straight too!! Teeheehee!! Sorry.  I'm giddy in love and stuff!!)
 
My name is Miss.Anna Johnson, 23 years old but age doesn't matter in a real relationship as you can remember that (LOVE IS BLIND) (TINK NOTE: The love is blind is her quote,not mine!!!) i am comfortable with your age(TINK NOTE: I wonder if she'd be comfortable with my real age of 121?).I'm originally from Republic of Liberia but due to my family plight and predicament(TINK NOTE: She said predicament! Giggle!), I am currently living in a country called Senegal in Africa.I'm 5 fit 9 inches tall (178 cm) single (never married)Both Republic of Liberia and Senegal are in African continent (TINK NOTE: Man, she sound perfect and also, she taught me some geography!! Wooo!! Bet she's a virgin too if I asked.  Perfect. I need a sacrifice for the Hoola Hoola Volcano just about to erupt in Lupa Lupa Land!)
 
My Dad was our Village local gold mining Inspector and Gold and Diamond dealer (TINK NOTE: He was also the priest, the nun AND the rabbi!!!)but he was killed in cold blood together with my mother in a gun short(TINK NOTE: Uh, gun short? I hate when that happens! "Oh no, gun shorted out! What we do now? We play Operation!") by un-identified family enemies along Roberts international Airport road in Monrovia.I am their only daughter so i don't have any other person again(TINK NOTE: Stop selling yourself so short, women nowadays can be anything they want to be, without a male family member to escort them to the bank...oh wait, I'm skipping ahead in the script!!).I don't want to be remembering all these stories again because is making me to think too much anytime it came to my mind(TINK NOTE: That's good, cause I don't really want to read about it either! So uh, you have nice lips, want to come to my house and play some games? Maybe Thermonuclear War? I got it on my Tandy!). This incident happened on one early morning the rebels attacked my family on their way to airport to board a flight to Gambia where we are living after a short trip to my country Liberia killing my parent on a cold blood.I supposed to be part of that trip but as God may have it the school was on vacation then so they left me behind in my country where i will be joining them on later date in Gambia when the school resumed.(TINK NOTE: You're still talking about the whole family getting wasted by a shorted out gun huh? Well, I'll be back when you're done, okay? Thanks.)
 
Immediately after their burial(TINK NOTE: I think I know why they died! You don't bury survivors of a short gun!!! Haha!! Sorry, please, continue!!!),things became so hard to me, coupled with the troubles and suffering I was passing through at the hands of my late father’s junior brother’s they are trying to take everything away from me even working hand to hand with my family enemies the people who killed my parent(TINK NOTE: Them dirty good for nothing bastards!! Hangings too good for them!!!!).To avoid them killing me, i have to escaped and found myself here in Senegal, with the help of Catholic Missionary Sisters under Red Cross although she have gone for missionary work(TINK NOTE: Teeheehee!! Against the Good Order's laws to do it doggy style!! WOOOP! There it is!!!).
 
I guess everyone needs and hopes to find true friendship(TINK NOTE: Yeah, friendship is okay, but fuck buddies? Even better!!).Sometimes both are in the same person(TINK NOTE: Yeah, but if I had to choose, I'd rather have fuck buddy!!! Oops, I mean, I love you, lets kissy kissy!!), and sometimes we find good relationships outside our city,country or even continent(TINK NOTE: Sometimes we find love on other planets!! Dare to dream!!!! Alien butt sex, is the best sex!!!!!!).I think these relationships are different and can be very meaningful(TINK NOTE: So this means we have butt sex now?).I would like to establish a good friendship with you first and see where this will led us to.(TINK NOTE: **pout** No butt sex huh? Exit only? Oh well, friendship good too, especially friendship with benefits!! **Drops the soap** Hello? Bending over, teeheehee!!! Now you say, "This certainly is a strange tea party!!" and put on the strapon.  Oops, I meant, I LOVE YOU!!!)
 
You may argue rightly that we are too far away from each other(TINK NOTE: Yeah, but I won't!!! LOVE ME CRYSTAL!! Oops, I mean Anna!!!! Yeah, not Crystal, your name is Anna!! Teeheehee!!),but I would want to say that the distance can not pose any problems in building a good relationship through regular correspondence if the interest is there.(TINK NOTE: Yeah, the interest is there.  You got nice boobies!!)
 
Don't forget i am in Dakar Senegal(TINK NOTE: And you remember, WHAT'S LOVE BUT A SECOND HAND EMOTION!!!!!) where i am staying now as a refugee under a Revrend father's care and i am using his computer to send these messages to you since the other day. I  was due to take my entrance to university in nursing before this incident occoured. (TINK NOTE: What? You chose me over your entrance exam to school? Oh lover, you shouldn't have! No really, I mean it, we could use the bread for our big wedding!!!!)
 
With regards to my interests(TINK NOTE: She has interests? Crap. I thought she was over with the letter!! Now I have to pretend I'm paying attention to her interests too?!?!?!?! Oops, I mean, I love it when you talk about yourself for hours and hours! Continue on about your doll collection!! So interesting....truely.......zzzzzzzzz......),My interests are varied.I am a very outgoing girl.I'm athletic and I love sports especially running,basketball,tennis and expanding my horizons in any way i can(TINK NOTE: Wait, expanding your horizon is a sport? Awesome!!!!).I vent my burdens on reading(TINK NOTE: Poor reading gets a lot I bet!!!! "Hello book, I have lots of burden! Would you listen to me oh dear Alice in Wonderland!?). I love listening to music and dance.I also love staying at a beach site kissing and hugging my soul mate.(TINK NOTE: Yea!! Kissy kissy time!!!! And huggy wuggy time! Woooo!!) I don't drink or smoke(TINK NOTE: Do you suck cock? Oops, I mean, very good!).I hate insincerity(TINK NOTE: ME TOO!!!!).I am very understanding and I just love meeting people(TINK NOTE: I like beating people! We're a match!! Wooooo!! MyYearBook never matched me as well as this email thingie does!!!! THANKS AGAIN OPEN.SALON!!!!). I would like to know more about you.Your likes and dislikes,your hobbied(TINK NOTE: My what? Giggle! Never on the first date!! Maybe second but only if you buy me liquor.  Okay, works on the first date too!!!) what you are doing presently(TINK NOTE: Masturbating!).Infact(TINK NOTE: No, I didn't cut anything here, she just said, Infact...)
 
Enclosed in the attachment is my picture.I think you may like to see it(TINK NOTE: And you'd be right, how did you know I've run out of masturbation material!?! Oh yeah, webcam! Teeheehee!!).I'm running out of self description subject(TINK NOTE: That's good, cause I'm running out of notes!!!!), if you notice I'm missing something just let me know and I'll tell you about whatever I have missed.Ok, I have to go now,thanks for your e-mail and please keep in touch.I would be so glad to get your own picture in your next mail(TINK NOTE: She didn't really read my email  cause if she did, she would have noticed my attached photo. Oh well, attached again it goes!!!!).
Your in love
Anna

 (Tink note: Actual photo Anna sent!!! I know, she sure does have a pretty necklace!!!! Anna has her own body guards which is a good thing to have when you're a refugee!!!!!)

So well, Ed writes back, full of passion and love and like that Antonio Banderas fellow, all heaving and such!!!

 "Love me, love my guns!!"

From: Hot loving Ho

To: Anna my hot soon to be hotter lover

Subject: Re: Happiness and love

My dearest Anna,
 
Sounds like you have lived a hard life, losing your parents in such a horrible way.  I truely cried when I read your email.
 
My life isn't no rose garden neither, my daddy, William H. Fartes, was a bull inseminator from Georgia, he was the best at his job.  One day, he was out in the fields, inseminating bulls left and right when he picked the wrong bull that hot and humid day.  The bull kicked ole papa in the head and killed him dead.
 
Before he died, he uttered to me his last words, "Rosebu..." well, he got most of it out, we never could figure out what he wanted to say. Mama says he may have wanted to say, "Rosebutt" but that makes no sense whatsoever. 
 
My mama, Mary Anne Fartes, is a good person but when she doesn't take her court ordered medicines, she can go a little insane.  I hope one day soon you will get to meet mama, she would like you, I believe. 
 
Her own story is very much like yours, mama wasn't a born in the US woman, but was from Sadaragahara, South Africa.  Her daddy was a high king/warlord or something who was assassinated in 1969, so I never got to know grandpappy on that side of the family.  She wasn't killed along with her mama and three brothers, because as the Clan of the Seven Monkeys came into sight, mama was hidden. 
 
Mama said she hid for three days, living off goat urine and dung, and then on the 4th day, she ran as fast as she could until she found her salvation, an army captain by the name of Cpt. William H. Fartes, that's right, my daddy.  He was in the military and they were doing something in the area, mama won't tell me what, state secret or something, but anyways, daddy and mama were a married not too long after that, and my sister, Cindy, was born not but 8 months after that.
 
I'm a middle child, got a brother, who's name is Carl, and we all live on the 40 acres of prime swampland here in Crawfish, Kentucky, USA.   Carl has taken on the job from my daddy as a bull inseminator while I am the top model in Crawfish, I pose for pictures whoever wants to pay me the most money.  My mama says I am the bestest model she has ever known.
 
I asked her how many she has known and she told me, I was the first and only model she has known.
 
My sister is an erotic dancer at the EL GATO DANCE CLUB AND MASSAGE PARLOR in beautiful downtown Crawfish, Kentucky.  She's the best dancer there, according to The Weekly Gazette and Times.
 
Family means a lot to me.  I want to meet a woman who can bear my children, and pull a plow, and after all that, come into the bedroom and be a total whore there, then when we're at church, be a total angel, a whoopin' the name of our good lord and savior, Andrew Jackson.
 
Also, I like to travel the world and help all god's children through an organization me and my sister have set up, HELPING OUR CHILDREN HEAL INTERNATIONAL --- HOCHI69.  We have helped numerous people around the world, the lastest, a woman from South Africa, in her last dying day, set up a church in her village, right before she died of cancer.
 
It is a great feeling still, looking at the picture of Madam JuJu Badabingabanger standing at the steps of the Church of Her Undying Love, the smiling children of the village gathered around her. Very nice indeed.
 
I attached my picture in my last email , but I guess you must have missed it, here it is again, for your viewing pleasure,
 
Your friend and hopefully soon more than that,
 
Ed
 

Nothing yet so far from my love, Anna, but I'm hoping that soon the reverend father pastor fellow mother will allow her to use their computer.

Good morning and have a better day.

Or something.

 The dog behind the Tink Pick Awards --- "You tain't gettin' one for this, cause youse didn't use me in an appropiate manner!! PFFFFFFFFFFFT!!!!!"  So if you get a Tink Pick, you know who to thank!!!!