You know, if you weren't such a pussy maybe you could straighten out your life and become a little bit of use to someone. Sell your liver, your bone marrow...come on, be a grown up you baby. Make ends meet with some offerings of sputum, saliva, stem cells, etc. to worthy rich Republican invalids in their wheel chairs looking to buy your legs, muscle tissue, whatever. Stop being a cry baby you pansy. Better yet, grow some pansies in your sorry rectum and offer them as a gift to your superior Rick Santorum. You have a comment on here from the biggest cry baby loser Harry's (life fucked me over) the Ghost. Living in a fucking homeless shelter. Why don't the two of you burn down the homeless shelter with all the bums in it and sell their burnt rectums to Santorum who needs a new anus himself. Think big, or shit small. All I can say this late you fruit....wink

"The Shepherd drives the wolf from the sheep's throat, for which the sheep thanks the Shepherd as a liberator, while the wolf denounces him for the same act as a destroyer of liberty."
Abraham Lincoln

I love the "Blame the victim" rhetoric of the Republican rapists. If your goddam ass is ever coming back Jesus, nail those fuckers first! They stick a knife in you then demonize you for bleeding.

What's just as bad are the useless idiots whose only understanding of life is to be led by the nose. "Gosh! Gee! Someone said it's their fault they are bleeding so it must be true!" Since they have no use for their heads, Jesus, please rip them right the fuck off. It seems cruel but in this case one must be cruel to be kind.

Then there are the capitulators, saying they love you while watching you die. "Them Republicans sure is mean but I don't want to hurt their feelings. Sure, they slaughter millions but nobody's perfect! I just know I can't do anything to stop them without making them cry. Life is about not making people mad!" But no one cares if one of the slaughtered gets mad!!! Grab the capitulators by the ear and toss them into space Goodtime Jesus!

But Jesus doesn't give a fuck either. It's just us here talking shit about how this is "the only way" and "Nothing we can do!" and horseshit "solutions" that only worsen the problem and delay justice. Profess ignorance all you want on the way to life but the sword of justice has no ears and cares only to stop the harm - no matter how fucking "justified" it may be in your twisted puny head.

I won't even try to be amusing. I have no idea if I could get a job now if I wasn't fucked up healthwise, but I hate not working. I was lucky that my old law school intern gig (which was really illegal under bar guidelines because it was not a law practice) asked me to come back as their volunteer online housing counselor, a job I can do at home. There's no money, but there is several hours of work a day, problems to solve. People say thanks. They say, wow, your advice saved my ass. It makes me feel less like I'm not there.

Dude, you know you can come and sofa surf at my place if you want to check out the local opportunities. We have tech. I would still love you even if you went to work for Zynga.

Jejune podiatrist

My comment was cut off - just saying that Delete might be handy here for Jejune.

Any you're right, grade eight or PhD - it's not a good scene.
I hope something positive comes your way, tink.
Don't go hanging off those weeping willows!

You'll get one of these two. *sending prayer up into the black aether, and down into the roots*
Being unemployed is a complete mindfuck for the self esteem. I think it has something to do with the phrase "what do you do?" being the most frequent thing you ask a stranger. We need to just focus on the weather and myob in this economy.

and YAY! thanks Jejune, we now have a focal point for our general rage and malaise
congrats!!

Ha ha ha, Jejune Podiatrist in a previous incarnation (Caracalla's Amanuensis) said that I was a child molester, and he even used my actual, non-OS name while doing so. For, you see, he had learned my real name from Bonnie Russell, who in fact is still stalking me across the WWW. Anway, when he made this completely slanderous accusation, he didnt' phrase it as a an amusing cyber comment but rather as a very literal assault on my character, and he implied, or rather, stated directly, that I was molesting children on a more or less constant basis. What an amusing person he is!

Reading a comment from Jejune Podiatrist is like looking at the bacteria-ridden backsplash on a wall from a clogged up, exploded toilet at a gas station.

Those were some bizarre answers to Rachel's question "do you think the country would be better off if there were less contraception use." Which by the way, his answer seems to be affirmative; the country would indeed be better off. He says: "It's not okay. It's a license to do things in a sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be."

Supposed to be - how are things "supposed to be"? Like getting a job? If that's supposed to be the way to success, then there are supposed to be jobs. Where are the supposed jobs. And I mean the ones that pay enough to actually live decently. As for his other fantasy answers, I don't know what to say. I think what he's really saying is things are supposed to be only one way - the Rick Santorum way.

@Tinkerertink69

There is only one true path to success in the U.S.A. Get yourself a stable of hookers and sell cocaine. My long term unemployment came in 2001 and lasted for nearly 5 years so I definitely know from where you speak.

If you need a job to run for president then why all these people on the ticket? Do you call those jobs?

Hey I can tell you how to get a job, seriously, just PM me if you're interested and no this is not a way for me to get rich, I don't make a dime from it, I just like to see people work...who want to work. Doing what they like,

Hey is Jejune being mean, or vague?

Keeping the dream alive is a wonderful thing, if you're asleep.
Great post, Tinkertink.

There are certainly many unemployed with derees right now Tink.
I meet them regularly in missions and food banks.
Having that magic college degree means nothing about job security as far as I can tell.
I was at a campground in NC for two weeks. I met three women, all former teachers with Masters degrees. all three had o9ld broken RV's. None had a job.
I meet many here of the so-called underemployed if delievering pizza or newspapers holding a Masters degree qualifies.
I met a former financial specialist now managing a dollar store.
I got curious and asked about his expensive suit. He said it was his first job in two years and he used to work in a 'major banking institution' in NYC.

Being long term unemployed is a soul sucker. I know too well this personally.

I agree with this title.
We are fucked, indeed.

Hard to make a straight comment Tink. Besides, those guys, Gingrinch, Sanitorium, Romney all sit on piles of other peoples money so even if they were unemployed they don't have to worry. It's damned easy to make pronouncements from Mt. Olympus but they will never, can never know the world that guys like us live in.

When I younger the old adage was, "Get a high school diploma, you'll get a good job."

Then it became, "You need a BS degree to get an entry level job."

Then later it became, "You must have MS degree to get a corporate job."

Now it is, "What! You don't have a PhD? You'll never get a job working at the front desk."

What's next? POTUS degree!

I feel your pain Tink, but remember, if you kill yourself, you'll never be able to jerk off again--and who doesn't enjoy a handjob in the morning. (See, the glass is half full)

I feel ya, cat. When the yowling sessions are over, there's no cream in the bowl, just water. And it's a toilet bowl, but hey, as a cat that's only natural. And how in the hell is anyone expected to choke down those Purina Cat Food pellets with any sense of dignity? Especially with no cream?

Even dogs get Alpo, with real beef!

You know, your post is only proof that this country really is going to the dogs. We got two peckered dog, running against the dog-eat-dog, running against dumb dog, running against a dog that won't hunt for Republican candidates. In the Office right now, all we have is Good Doggy! Except he won't heel.

What we need right now is a good cat for prez. Or even a Cat/Owl ticket. It'd at least give us something to do where we can look good, say stupid things and make points about not saying anything relevant and all the while, people will be talking about us.

You know, the more I think on it, the better it sounds. Tink and Dunniteowl for Prez/Veep! It's sounding better and better. Everyone who's ever watched Most Extreme Hunters on Animal Planet knows cats are the most successful feline predator and that owls are the most successful raptor.

Our slogan could be: Do you really want this country to go to the dogs?

We could use Jejuene Podiatrist as our campaign speech writer! We could always use speeches calling our opponents assholes -- because they are!

--r--

All too true...

Darling kitty, perhaps you could revise the Republican definition of success. It does not suit you. Not too many of us meet that definition.

Include on your list things like: smart, creative, talented, funny, sweet, and wealthy in friends, as Mr. Capra might say. These are not hollow attributes, and I know some "successful" people who'd give anything for what you have.

I'm sorry it's been so hard finding a job. We have a friend who's been unemployed for months and is starting a new job today. It's been hellish for him being unemployed. Hope something comes along, Tink.

I don't quite know what to say other than, "I'm sorry." Sorry that you're struggling. Sorry that you were laid off. Sorry that people who want to work, who have skills that shouldn't be ignored, who have desire and a work ethic and bills and a family to support, can't find a job. Sorry that you have to listen to crap from politicians, fill out stupid forms in Human Resource departments, and that you have to do this for years and still not have a job. Sorry for it all. Wishing better for you.

Good post a lot of folks can relate to. I am sorry you are one of them, hoping for a better year for you Tink.

Keeping that little ember alive, be it hope, revenge, acting"as if"; so many of us have to do it. Hafta. And I want to see a cat named Tink in my peripheral vision no matter what! So you hang in there!

With you 100%, Tink. Your anger is very effectively used in this piece.

"And when the majority of people

are hungry and cold

they will take by force what they need

when property accumulates

in too few hands

it is taken away.

Steinbeck - Grapes

r

It's not just the high school dropouts who got pregnant when they were 17 who are hurting in this economy, they aren't the only ones getting laid off, in this day and age, it can happen to anyone.

and does. Rated with tuna and those weird little catmints for your breath...could help in the next interview.

I read this before you posted it and is there really an American Dream??? What is left ?
I am pulling for you my friend. No one would hire me anymore at 60.
I am no ones dream..
HUGGGGGGGGGGGG

Here's my list. (Which doesn't apply to me.)

1. Be born into money.
2. Marry into money.
3. Inherit all the money. See number 1.

Seemed to work for Mitt Romney.

Being unemployed gives us the opportunity to pursue the arts. Too bad it doesn't pay.

May the pols roast in everlasting hell (frothy Santorum will know what I mean) for their lies and evasions.

30% of americans kids drop out of high school. in "urban areas" the dropout rate is 50%.

couple this with the high number of people who cannot pass a drug test as part of the job application process, and I think we understand why so many people are out of work - and blame "the system"

yes - that damn system that expects you to get a high school diploma (for free) and not use narcotics.

oh - the unfairness of it all.

What's it like? Let's see. I was laid off in March of 2010. Amazingly my husband was laid off one month later. It's now almost 2 years later. We've lost our home. We have no savings. We are living above a barn with no running water. No bath. No kitchen. To do our "business" we have to go out into the elements and walk over to the main house. In the winter. In the snow. I have sent out resumes every damned day for almost two years. I broke my ankle in November. Guess how easy it is to live this way with a broken ankle. My unemployment runs out in May. My husband's in April. Then what? I'm almost 60 years old. Been working for 41 years. What is our future to be? I just don't know. But something has to give. This hell cannot be what I have to look forward to for the rest of my life..... yet no one's listening. WHY????

What's it like? Let's see. I was laid off in March of 2010. Amazingly my husband was laid off one month later. It's now almost 2 years later. We've lost our home. We have no savings. We are living above a barn with no running water. No bath. No kitchen. To do our "business" we have to go out into the elements and walk over to the main house. In the winter. In the snow. I have sent out resumes every damned day for almost two years. I broke my ankle in November. Guess how easy it is to live this way with a broken ankle. My unemployment runs out in May. My husband's in April. Then what? I'm almost 60 years old. Been working for 41 years. What is our future to be? I just don't know. But something has to give. This hell cannot be what I have to look forward to for the rest of my life..... yet no one's listening. WHY????

Well, I'm not sorry for you one little bit, you miserable, mangy old, useless feline. If you were a REAL AMERICAN you'd show some gumption and "good-ol'-'Merikan-know-how" and get out there and inherit a few million like me and all my fat-cat friends did.....

.

aureole,
Do people like you take stupid pills every day? You are implying that the ONLY people who are unemployed are druggie drop-outs!

I'll tell you what. You show us where the jobs are and we'll show you 25 to 35 MILLION drug free HS grads who would love to have one. I'll go one step further - you show me where in the US some decent jobs are, that are going begging for lack of HS grads who are drug free, and I'll give you a dollar for every one that I can verify.

Should be an easy way for you to get rich, if you thesis is correct.

.

Can't help but cheer on Harry's Ghost.

It's obscene that the politicians yammer on about work ethic, blah blah, it's-your-own-fault, as if there are actually jobs out there for the taking.

Miz Baltimore, shut the fuck up. Have you READ these comments? For instance, Sheryl Cooper's? Not one from an inner-city crackhead. (And there wouldn't be inner-city crackheads, or a helluva lot fewer, if society were arranged more equitably.)

It looks more and more as if the unemployed will have to band together in some kind of collectives and build shelters and grow their own food, etc. Raise chickens for bargaining with doctors...

We are well and truly screwed.
And by the way, does it ever seem as though there are more than a few of us around this joint who are at least quasi-smart, semi-literate and woefully unemployed? How's that stack up in the demographics of this land of opportunity?
I can't give up. But I sure am frustrated. Know why I can't give up? I can't afford to retire--ever. Dammit.

Two years ago I got fired. Me fired! Because my boss who shall remain nameless (Joey Sutton, oops) decided he didn't like the sound of my voice when he called from his second home in Denver to see how much crap I sold. I have this raspy bourbon sounding voice. I had it when I was 10 and my 18 year old daughter has it too. Some people actually like it. I had never freaking been fired before in my 30 something years of working. I followed those rules to the T. Even got the "higher education" degree. Big fucking whoop. The only rule you need to follow is to marry rich. Why oh why didn't I do what my mother wanted? And why is it that I'm always attracted to guys who want to "help people" or "create"?
PS Anyone wanna buy a kidney?

I sure wish I could do more than just agree with you - we are fucked.
Hang in there, Tink!
For what it's worth, I would love to see the cat and owl run this country the way it should be. Would that be sore bums for all, or just the 1%?

The Tinkisms in this piece make it easier (read: less painful) to read, but maybe if you removed them this one time, Ed-I-Tor might see fit to give it the EP it deserves. All those asshats running for Republican President find it easy to spit "get a job" from their highly funded mouths. None of them are finding it easy to articulate where those jobs are or will come from. Meanwhile, real people like you and others here slip slowly into despair.

Lezlie

Not easy to read or comment on, especially since I do have a job. But I also know, working at a university, that I could be RIF'd any day and then I would be hosed. I believe Myriad has it right about the collectives. I don't understand why they're not the norm already. Pool resources and everyone benefits. Good luck, and BTW, you can game those tests. I'll look up my notes and let you know.

Lots of people here on OS, including me, have been pointing up the need for co-ops and for establishing establishing an alternate economy of some sort; often one based on barter.

I wonder how many of you are aware that there are, in the US, right now, thousands of such organizations. Some have even begun printing their own money!!!

I had no idea that this was so well developed until I came across an article in Business Insider magazine about them. I don't know where to find out more but I'd bet that Google might be a good place to start.
.

Here's the line that will resonate with everyone:

"I'd knife the cocksucker and leave him to die in the wilderness, possibly to be devoured by wild animals."

We all have at least one of those cocksuckers in our lives.

Yeah, I know this won't get an EP - this is OS, after all - but I doubt that there will be a better response to the OC. Underneath the humor is a bitter truth that too many of us learned the hard way.

"None of them do, Democrats, Republicans.

The Socialists might."

yep.

It can happen to anyone. Under all your funny you are a serious dude, know that? And your ending does sorta freak me out. No hanging allowed!

Tink, you da man. That is all.

(And you da weird orange cat.)

I've heard too many stories like yours recently. I am sorry about your situation. There are so many good and capable people out of work, it's heartbreaking. I'm self employed, and I am just barely making it these days, times are tough. And then there's heartless politicians who just make it tougher with their complete lack of understanding.
You brighten a lot of people's lives with your writing. Hang in there.

I burst out loud in the middle of my office when you said "tuna breath"

And then I read the end.
I'm so sorry. :(
Every day, because of this, I feel lucky that my number hasn't been called, although every year around the 20th day everyone is on pins & needles seeing who stays and who gets the boot. It's sad really.

Off to drop baltimore aureole from my fav list... sheez!

'tis a cruel ass country we live in, but hard to imagine hiring
a true nazi like Santorum for anything more than a guillotine
tester.
Me, being self-employed (meaning I at least get to work 20 weeks of the year) ... well, it's still working some, and I get to keep a shred, a modicum of self-esteem. Who knows how long I'll still get to keep scraping and hustling up even that.. though?
As my fav prez said, "I feel your pain." I really do..
Hope and change? Sometimes that willow can look like a pretty good change I imagine.
Luvya man

All the feelings anyone has like depression, anxious uncertainty, anger about being laid off, the interviews where they don't hire you, the rejection letters, are NORMAL responses to a situation where your survival is at risk.

Not having desired skills to market I've been unemployed many times, especially in the last decade and each time I go through the same thing. What is a shame is that it's not legally or morally acceptable to use a machete to whack the hand off some heartless predator who either put you there or someone who blames you for what has happened to you.

Predatory humans are roaming free in our society, your first commenter is acting like one. I know many predators and I always breath a sigh of relief when I meet a powerless one. I don't allow them into my personal life, I only have to endure them at work. I never help a predator because they're a danger to us all and it's best if they are rendered powerless. God help us as more predators achieve positions in management and move up the chain. It's always best for the innocent when one destroys another.

Hang in there and ignore people who are an aberration in the evolution of our species. Most of us here are normal and feel the same things as you.

Don't you get it? People with power loooked around and said, "Why should all those nobodies have two cars and a nice house and a vacation? Why should they be eating steak? Why should they have Saturday AND Sunday off, the lazy soandsos? That shit should ALL be mine!" So, they passed the laws that took it all away. Just like the North Koreans did. And, they are buying up the remainder at firesale prices

You know its not you- its the completely fucked up system we have where people are expendable and looked upon as a drain on the sacred profit margin and positive return for shareholders.

Hang in there bro- maybe one day the 99% will realize that if we band together we can take back America before its too late.
OK- I'm dreaming- but don't give up hope...

Jejune, yeah! I should stop being sooooo damn selfish!!! Newt could us a brain, Mitt too!! WE'RE OFF TO SEE THE WIZARD, THE WONDERFUL WIZARD OF OZ!! :D

P.S. will you be my new best friend? :D

Harry, ~nod~ If Jesus ever did come back, he'd be put into one of them detention camps as a terrorist!! ~nod~

Sirenita, I'm there already, don't you see me on the couch? ;) (and yeah, that factor of mind numbness --- we bitch and moan how awful it is when we have a job, but trust me, I'd rather be working, at least then there's something going on, right now, I got nothing, I mean, I could clean the bathroom(need to do it, the Master Bathroom is a cluttered mess....my fault, it's the one I use!! :D) but pfffft, housework, who wants to do it? :D

DiBi, ...is my new best friend!! ~:D Nah, no delete!!! I like it when people chew me a new butt!! :D (And if by the grace of God, this makes it to Salon, I would need to get toughened skin or something!! ~:D)

Thanks, no swinging yet, can't find the rope I left for just such a case!!! :D

Julie, ~nodding~ I need to change my answer--when asked what I do, I'm going to smile proudly and say, "I blog with some International Fame!!!" :D

Instead of, I'M AN UNEMPLOYED COMPUTER OPERATOR, MY BUTT IS SORE!! :D

jane, what I find so funny, it takes 3 hours to fill out an application for like Walmart(they tell you right up front...make sure you have like 3 hours!!) but to put in for a job as Director or something, all I have to do is submit my resume!! I think they have the process backward!! ~:D

~hug~

The American Dream as Developed by a Drunken Cat is the New America!! ~:D

Julie, Jejune is now my Director of Human Resources at my new company I'm building, EEK Enterprises! We're going to sell widgets!! ~:D

nana, ~hug~ But in my comment, he/she/they make sense, I should sell my liver to like a dying Republican, I mean, my liver still has about a year of life to it, so.....:(

DiBi, hey, did you review one of my posts for the New York Icky? They used the same words!! ~:D

Margaret, ~nodding~ I'm still confused: How does attacking 'immoral behavior' get us back on the road to economic greatness?

I'm lost. ~shaking head~

But then, I had to stop watching a lot of the political bullshit as it raised my blood pressure and I don't have the insurance to pay for the meds, so happy thoughts --- strangling....:D

Anthony, I'm getting close to perfecting my meth for kids called, LoliMeth!! ~:D I think that's my only way to fame and fortune!! :D

jane, I know, right? Farmville is more addictive than crack, why? I have no clue!! The only way I got off it is, well, my main puter is dial up and well, slow crack sucks!! But porn...AWESOME AT ANY SPEED!! Wait...;D

Dianne, send me the job!! Do you need someone killed? I can do it!! :D(and on the other question, that's their idea for me on a job!!! :D I think it a grand idea!!! :D)

Kim, thank you kind sir!! And you'll note, I got my invisible EP at 3.2 minutes after posting this!! ;)

Mission, ~nodding~ it seems a lot of us are Fucked, either way we turned!! :(

bobbot, no straight answer needed!!! And it's funny how people will pay millions of dollars for a job with lots of stress and the salary ain't that great....wonder why? :D (Speaking fees? People will pay me to speak??? AWESOME...:D)

hafital, Exactly!!! :(

rw, exactly!! I WANNA LIVE!! :D

Cat and Owl Ticket...you can't go wrong with them!! ~:D

American, and sad!! :(

heron, I know, I have friends, I make people laugh(especially when I'm naked!! Not so much when I'm in Walmart, but hey...:D) **hugs**

Besides, I can't find the rope...who took the rope??? It's hemp...:D

Erica, I have a feeling something will come along, something good, not a freight train barreling down on me either...:D

jl, thanks very much, I have learned, that before I retire for good(what do you mean, this is it!! WAAA!! :D) I need to find me some hobbies that are outdoors!! Damn toilets, you'll get clean, tomorrow!! ~:D

rita, thanks, I'm hoping and praying for a better year!! So far, it been alright...as long as I don't turn on the TV to news!! :D

skirt, I'm hanging....on!! ~nodding~ :) I'll be here even when I'm dead, I bet Hell has pretty awesome computers!! ~:D

Snippy, thanks, I think we both need to go on a snipping tour of the country!! ~:D

toritto, like I told my friend a few days ago, this country started with a revolution, and it will probably end with one.

Muse, I loves the mints!! Thank you!! :D

Linda, apparently, at 40, I'm done too!! WAAAA!! I could serve dog food to mental patients!!! I COULD!! :(

I did it for four years to college students back when I was in college!! PFFFFT!!

Bernadine, damn right!! :( My family has a curse, it will seem that we are close to success, then the rug gets pulled out from us!! :(

Miguela, exactly!! Gives us a chance to ponder things, that also sadly, do not pay either!! :(

Boaner, a roast sounds good!! Nummy!! ~Wanders off~ ~:D

baltimore, but wait, I'm drug free, most of the time, and graduated not only high school but also college, and damn if I didn't follow the bible thumpers' rule of 'No sex till you're married!!' oh wait, suppose to be with my wife? Damn it, they should add that!! ~:D

Like I said, when it happens to you, those people touting off all around you will make you want to go on a killing spree!! ~nod~

Sheryl, exactly!! :(

sky, add me to the will, I'll bump you off quickly!! :D

Myriad, ~nod~ I'm one of the lucky ones!! I still have a gun, just need to find some bullets.

What these people on the other side don't realize, there's more of us than they like to believe, and when the revolution begins, guess who we'll be going for? The rich....the ones with the nice mansions and pretend they're one of the little people!!!!!!!!!!

Viva La Revolution!! ~:D

(To law enforcement reading this: I think the rich have better drugs, go bust them!! :D)

Walter, ~nodding~ I think the only way I'm retiring is by getting busted for selling crack to pre-school kids!! ~:D

Barbara, we can put that kidney up for auction!! ~:D (And nod, preach it!!!)

Barb, sore butts for all!! ~:D

Lez, I give a shit what Ed I Tor thinks about my writing, I wrote this for me and almost didn't post it, if you can't stand the Tink, stay out of the litter box!! ~:D

But congrats on your EP!

(I'll be back for more replies in a half hour) ~wanders off for potty break~

i laid myself off
rehired myself
and terminated my contract
after much helium ingestion
just ruminating ...

L, ~back~ And ooh yeah, watched MoneyBall the other day, I think you'd like it, the one actor in it, should get a truck full of Oscars, his mom should be proud!! :D (Seriously, good movie! I liked it, wifey did too!!! And that's hard to do!!!!)

Phyllis, I'm ready to game those tests!! ~nod~ :D

sky, ~nodding~ Yep, quite a bit of trading and such going on, when there's a will, there's a way. There has also been an increase in living off the grid over the last few years, magazines and such totally dedicated to the subject along with living off the land, raising animals, etc.

Cranky, humor is the best medicine and if said cocksucker should happen to get knifed and his body left for the wolves, then, well, I can say, "Wasn't me, I was with ten prostitutes and enough cocaine to kill a hundred men!!!" :D

EPs are for suckers anyways, I'm in it for the groupies and the money!! ~:D

What money? ADSENSE BABY, 25 CENTS ALREADY TODAY!! WOOP WOOP!! :D

dolores, and everytime a Socialist runs, we get, BUT THEY'RE A SOCIALIST!! PFFFT!! :(

Laura, damn right no hanging, no rope!! ~:D

froggy, hell yeah, ORANGE CAT IN THE HOUSE!! :D And when I'm elected Mayor of Hooterville, you'll be my frog in chargE!! :D

Kevin, ~nodding~ My pop has been self employed forever, people think that's the answer, and if you find the right nitch, then it can be. My pop taught me some things, mostly, don't become an antique dealer, better dealing crack! ~:D

Orange, like I said, anyone can be "let go", "lose their job" etc. I hate that term too, lose your job, who the hell loses their job, I know where it is, it ain't lost, I just can't get to it!! :)

trig, ~nodding~ Yeah, can you lend some self-esteem to a man? I'll pay ya back on Friday when my self-esteem from the gubermint comes in!! ~:D

Bleue, wait, it's illegal to hack someone's hand off? EEK!! If anyone asks, I was with you the entire night on January 12th!! :D

Wren, I think that fits my new ideal just nicely!! "Why the hell does Neighbor A need a house for, I need two!! Buy it at discount prices!!!" :D

Ian, Hope? Is she the new lady down at the unemployment office? She's nice!! :D

Seriously all, thanks for all the comments, better than an EP any old day!!! You guys are the reason I keep writing(even the negative comments, I love em, I HAZ NEW FRIENDS!!!! KEEP ME GROUNDED!! :D)

Also, if anyone has any rope, you can PM me for the address where to send it!! ~:D

Dr. Ziggy, I did that too!! I've discovered I'm a bad employee!! No wonder I got laid off!! ~:D

Why did you answer true to"Sometimes, it's okay to steal from the Company!"

Hey, I am here for you. Stay away from the damn tree. It is already weeping.

And people claim there is no age discrimination in the good ol' U. S. of fekkin A. I say "BS!" -

"Maybe it's my tuna breath."

Come on! Quit making excuses and get those nose hairs clipped! They are your problem.

I really hope you get some esteem from your writing, because you do have us.

Jack, because they said to tell the truth!! :D

I said hell yea to the question "Smoking Marijuana is just like smoking a cigarette" :D

Actually better...:D

Sheila, it's a tricky tree though, lets you sit under its branches and talks to ya, but wait, that could be the wind..DAMN YOU WIND!! GIVE ME BACK MY ROPE!! :D

Teacher, ~nodding~ It's alive and well. The funny one is when they tell me they can't pay me what I was making at my previous job. My reply: I don't care, that was in the past, now I'm making zero!! ~:D

They would not let me clean toliets if I beg.

I'm left handed. Guess I could south of the equator though.

Hope this ends someday soon for you.

zuma, you know I do! The day I don't piddle myself in excitement at reading comments from The People, is the day I end it all and post my final curtain call!! ~:D

(And damn those nose hairs!! :D)

SORE BUTTS UNITE!!!

J D, ~nodding~ Yeah, I also got a rejection letter today from a food service position!! I guess I'm too awesome to serve salisbury steak to sick people! Whooo! ~:D

I have hope that it will end soon....for the good!! :D

Undecided.




....and personally I don't get FUCKED nearly often enough.

Really, you could sell part of your brain or body parts to get by. Why does everybody laugh at that. It's an American tradition. Where would Frankenstein be if Gene Wilder didn't put an A B Normal brain into the dead drive-by shot body. Recycling of the dead is another fine Amerikan tradition that goes back to Charlton Heston in Soylent Green. Remember? If you developed gangrene in one of your limbs you could hack it off for cat food, like Jack Lord when he hacked off Danno's syphilitic penis in Hawaii Five-O in 1968 to keep the program on air. You have to use your imagination Tink! Or does everyone have a faulty memory these days. Another thing you could do is piss on the peanuts on the conveyor belt at the Planters Peanut factory to save their expense on salting them. Fuck, do I have to think of everything your cock and kidneys could do...hey, how about middle Amerikan 'cock'n kidney pie?' You fruity kat you...dubble nudge!

Ah Tink... read this earlier. Back to tell you how good this is or was... or bad... or something. Forceful message.

It comes through clearly.

Saludos fuzzball~

mrvoulezvous, everybody needs to get fucked more!! :D

Jejune, I have faulty memories, well, actually, my memory is good, it just replaces things with other things. Does anyone else remember the time when Ronald Reagan gave his state of the Union in the nude?

I do!! ~:D

And I've been pissing in the peanuts for years!! ~nodding~ ~:D

Inverted, thanks!!! I've been trimming up the furballs, selling them to the tourists as 'good luck charms'!! ~:D

I always have to shake my head when I hear someone, and it's invariably the right-wingers, put the blame on the unemployed for not going out and getting a job. As if the unemployment rate merely measured cyclical laziness.

Abrawang, yeah, this country sure does seem to be filled with a lot of lazy people!! Damn uneducated masses!! GET A HAIRCUT TOO!! :D

~shakes head~

Dear Tink, I read this when you wrote it but didn't feel strong enough to comment till now. My heart aches for you, and I wish I could wave a magic wand and make it all better, but I don't have that power. Once I told my boss at my last job that I wished I could be a saint so I could heal people, but Im not a saint either. I am just left wishing you find purpose in life once again. It's so hard to go on in the darkness.

cc, ahhh thanks. I think soon something good is going to happen!!!! -nod-

Dear Tink, I hope that's an "Awww - thanks" and not an "Ahhh - I feel weird"!
I felt your frustration in what you wrote. I wished I could do something for you, but what can I do do since I can't offer you a job, all I can do is sympathize....:-(

I have some advice inspired by Chicago Guy, who posted something just as hopeless as yours but without the cute wit. You never get anywhere making yourself die. You will get somewhere if you make other people die. Instead of hanging yourself, find a way to get a firearm. Observe the rich and powerful. Find clever ways to get to them. Develop a plan, get close to them and provide them some nine-millimeter critiques of their lives.

To paraphrase George Patton, no poor bastard ever got anywhere dying because of a bad economy. He got somewhere by making some rich bastard die because of a bad economy.