Tinkerertink69

Tinkerertink69
Location
Your closet, Indiana, France
Birthday
July 16
Title
President and CEO of Your Mom
Company
Your closet
Bio
Smell my Paws! Does that smell like poo to you? Writer? No way! I'm a guy with a cat who knows my passwords and likes to blog!! What? Oops, I mean, I'm a cat who likes to blog. Smell my paws!!! French prostitutes? Only on Tuesdays!! Lets cuddle!!

Tinkerertink69's Links

Salon.com
FEBRUARY 1, 2012 7:01PM

skypixie made the call, and Tink responds!

Rate: 14 Flag

The call went out --- TINK, THE PEOPLE ARE WAITING, WHAT DO YOU SAY? (Tink Notes: Since Open's new window has never worked with links, right click and open in new window/tab/whatever u like and you can stay where the answers will be told and read the questions!!! WOOO!!! I know, this should have been in other posts but well, Tink sucks at giving timely advice!!!!!) and Tink, after a nice long nap in front of his biggest fan(Tink Notes: An ArticBlast 7000!!! If that's the best Corporations can do with the mix of the right workers and just enough Government regulations to justify what we pay them fuckers and no unions in the State of South Carolina where the AB7000 is made by illegal immigrants, I'll respond to my few critics of my last post by saying, NO UNIONS, MORE ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS AND NO MININUM WAGE IS GOOD!!! But well, it's still nice to have safety regulations like 'brakes should work in cars....you know, so as not to bruise the potential food products ala human beings who can't work no more....') has decided to respond to that call!!


DATE: February 1st, 2012

To: The World

Subject:  My ass is so going to look awesome sitting behind the desk in The Oral Office.

In Florida (Tink Notes: toritto's state made a scream out -- NEGATIVE ADS SELL SHIT!!!  They should teach that in school starting at the 1st grade!), the other day, Tinkerertink69 received more votes than Rick Santorum.  Tink was pleased, he wasn't even running and he got more votes than Rick!!!

Tink has heard the calls, from every state, the People say, TINK! TINK! TINK!

They could be chanting PINK! PINK! PINK! but Tink doesn't hear too well, he has selective hearing lost!  So he goes with what he THINKS he hears(Tink Notes: Just like other great presidents!! Hi Ronald Reagan, Bill Clinton and G.W. Bush!!!!)

If elected, I will put our troops where it matters, invading the USA!!

For too long, the USA has been a bully, a dictator, and a Communist front with some Capitalist Scum touting off how regulations and chocolate ice cream is the cause of the Downfall!

We should invade the USA!

If we're going to try and help rebuild a nation in need, to throw off the chains of repression so they can put on some new ones, then we should start with our own nation.

Trillions of dollars spent on a war should go back to the nation that gave us, US!

The USA is good at some things, mostly we're good at wars.  Not so well with occupation, and therefore, we will just keep the war going and fuck the Occupation: USA!

10 years of tanks rolling through the country side?  No way! 

The War will be low prices on crappy electronic products we know the USA can build just as shitty as the Chinese.

We will bring back the cars we KNOW  the USA can build just as cheaply and as crappy as the Japanese and our cars will have brakes that might work, but if they don't, well, we know a great use for your corpse.

I don't care about the division of the country, Right, Left, in the Middle, in my world, there are no division, there is only one type of people and that is 'Potential Ingredients of a Food Product'!

For too long, since the days of probably the first cumsuckers ala the first burp in the pools of steaming shit that some call the pools of life wandered off into life, there has been division.

People will scream at you, shake their fists, and try to make their points on both sides, the Middle folks just kind of stand there snickering and writing scripts for Jon Stewart and Colbert.

What is the point?

In the end, we all die and rot in the ground or get burnt to dust and really, what is the point in that?

Wouldn't you rather be devoured by an overweight kid in Austin, Texas, to give back to a society that gave you everything, including life?

I would.

The USA is still the greatest country in the world.  Where else can you get a prostitute, cocaine and a cheap, all you can eat buffet all at 3 AM?

USA!

And we wonder why other nations are jealous of us!

We are THE NATION that ponders how we can make heart clogging cheese sticks even more nummier by adding a melted grease product with garlic flavoring as a dipping sauce while adding MORE CHEESE!!

And then we wonder, why, we are so fucking fat!

Couldn't be the Bending Elbow Syndrome OR Shovel to Mouth Disease that make our asses so damn fat, no, it must be our lack of bands around our internal organs that is making us fat!

And we pay $$$ to have doctors cut into us to add those bands in hope that maybe, just maybe, we can fit into a size 5(as size 6 is now considered OVERWEIGHT MODELS!) BEFORE our high school reunions!

I SAY MORE BANDS FOR OUR INTERNAL ORGANS!!

And if elected president, I promise overspending by jillions(remember when jillion was an imaginary number, my dream is to make it a real number!!!) of dollars on researchers who will not only ponder but make it a reality of removing the digestive system from humans in hopes that will be an answer to weight loss!

I also promise to make our roads unsafer by giving states more money than they can spend on a prostitute to finger fuck while snorting cocaine off the ass of a State Senator(HI SENATOR MAX BAUCUS!!!) if they DO NOT repair the pot holes in their streets and highways.

Why?  It's like a super challenge to try and avoid them monsters, makes better drivers and possibly walkers!

Ever tried to cross a street with lots of potholes?

If you don't break your ankle in the first six months of my new plan, you'll be promoted to Director of Transportation of your state!

I know, JOB CREATIONS GALORE!!

And those who don't survive?

Organ donation and food creation at its finest.

We'll probably have a surplus so them poor starving children Sally Struther keeps touting off about can have something to eat too!

Mmmmmm, Omar in Sandaskiafaghar, you can have Paul from Duluth, high fat content will make you big and strong and you can, after perfecting your free throw average, join the NBA or possibly the NFL!

Multimillionaires heading back to their country of origin to help rebuild their nation and we didn't, as a Country, have to provide foreign aid!

More money to invest in our Long Term War in the United States of America, ala, Rebuilding Schools that have suffered from years of neglect and maybe, just maybe, building a better college sports system that doesn't rely on goddamn news agency to pick the teams who will play in the Bowl games!

One Bowl, One Champion, two teams go in, only one team comes out.

The losers are turned into Tasti-Snacks for sale at Circle Ks!

Soccer?

Not in my country!

Unless you want to allow the use of guns as a defensive option!

And if after four hours of play, with no score, both teams will be turned into Tasti-Snacks.

That shit just gets old. 

God bless, and remember, if you want real change, as in nuclear meltdowns in Maine, Vote Tink:2012!

Good night and have a better tomorrow!

 

 

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P.S. Corporations as People good, means more options for Tasti-Snacks!! Mmmmmmm......Harrahs Entertainment in my Tasti-Snacks along with Papa John!! MMMMMM!! ~Drool~

(Forgot to add a link to Sheila's newest, also inspiring my policies ----http://open.salon.com/blog/sheilatgtg55/2012/02/01/the_rise_of_the_corporate_state
Yay, Tink has answered the call of the crazies. Vote Tink, Tink, Vote Tink....

Lezlie
TINK!!!! Do you need a first lady, loan shark or lobbyist imp? Let me know I can hook that up for you!!! Corporate nation, stop the Tink man, you might need a drink man, but then you must know TINK is our Leader!!!! All hail a liter of Tink!

We want change...any spare change you got.

I am giving all of it to this campaign. We need to sweep the street of corruption and I intend to use as many cat tails as I can to do it.

Woof! Stand up and be counted canines! We need to get out there and sand bag and fight....

Calling out the PIRATE WIMMIN!!!!!
Way to go Tinkerertink!!

Soylent Green for all who remain! Snack on a hubby teen today!
.
I Early-Voted for TINK.
Those who do not vote TINK....

AMERICA,

IT'S
TINK
OR
SINK!

r.
Eeeeeeeeeeeeek! "chubby" teen; not "hubby"...... put your knives away girls!
.
Lezlie, I AM THE CRAZIES!! Wait...;D

Sheila, I can use it all!! Mostly THE CHANGE!!!! Nickels, dimes, quarters, fifty cent pieces, even the pennies*(cause how are we going to make it rain pennies in this room without them? BARACK, I LOVES YOU MAN, BUT YOU GOTTA GO, AND NEWT AND MITT AND EVEN THAT RICK FELLOW(SORRY RON, YOU NEED TO GO INDEPENDENT!! YOU TOO LOONY FOR THE REPUBLICANS!!!!!!!!) YOU AIN'T GOT THE CHANGE FOR THE MASSES, ONLY ONE CAT GOTZ IT, AND YOU'RE LOOKING AT HIM!! FOUR YEARS? LETS MAKE IT EIGHT AND WE'LL SEE HOW FAR THIS GODDAMN MOTHER FUCKIN' RABBIT HOLE GOES...SAMUEL JACKSON, YOU IN!!!!!

:D

sky, EXACTLY!!!! Unions, Corporations, all the same, food!! :D

Jonathan, damn right!!!! WOOT!! WOOT!! :D

At my State of the Union addresses, I'm going to have Jerry Springer and Maury Povich as my lead ins!!

Maury: YOU ARE THE FATHER OF THIS GREAT LAND!! :D

sky, chubby teens are good too!! Hubby teens would be an awesome name for an MTV show!! :D
toritto, damn right!! EVERYBODY(including me!) IS A CRACKWHORE!!!

Why so much hatred for the crackwhores by the way? We should embrace them crackwhores, they job creators too!! ~:D
I shall ask you.. Do you care about the very poor people or are you like Romney?
HUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
If you keep our troops here I will write you in! Many blessings unto you.
@Tinkerertink69

Best news evaaaar!!!! Cocaine, hookers, and politics go together like nitro and glycerine you'll be a natural. Remember me when it's time to make political appointments and even more so when it's time to hand out the pardons.
does that mean cats are people too?
hope so
rated with love
Here a suggestion - why not sell Texas? They were talking about seceding a while back and it's like in sports. if a big star is talking about taking a walk, you try to trade him while he's still yours. The Mexicans would dearly love to have it back. And the Mid-East petroleum states would surely love to get their hands on another oil-producing territory. Then there's the Russians who are still smarting from losing Alaska. And China is sitting on a Texas-sized pile of greenbacks. Give this some thought Tink.
I tink I'll vote for tink! R.
All together now......

'TINKIE FOR PREZZIE!"........"TINKIE FOR PREZZIE!"

.
Sir, I did find your birth certificate as you requested. Have you kept important documents in your litter box for a long time, or was it the result of your busy schedule? With respect, I suggest you select another place.
"Where else can you get a prostitute, cocaine and a cheap, all you can eat buffet all at 3 AM?"

First of all, there are no Buffets open at 3 am in southern Idaho, fix it! Second, I don't want Tasti-Snacks made from losers, make them from the winning team and I'll vote for you.
I'm afraid this is all beginning to make sense to me. HELP
I'm afraid this is all beginning to make sense to me. HELP
You have my vote provided you're constitutionally eligible to run!
This is a very good platform, which is why you can never win. Still, I know you'll look so good in your blue debate suit and red tie and flag pin. Maybe for the first time in several decades, I'd watch a debate.
Linda, sometimes, like Romney, I like the poor, baked with a nice side of lettuce greens and just a touch of olive oil and garlic dressing. MmmmmmMMMmmmm!! ~:D

Laura, thank you!! I say invading ourselves is the best option, keep the troops where they belong!! HOMELAND!!! ~:)

Anthony, you already know you're going to be my drug czar!! And prostitutes too!! I always LOVED the title DRUG CZAR!! :D

RP, cats are people!! Sometimes dogs are too. But damn if them ferrets are, they politicians working off hours!! ~:D

Abrawang, Texas could get us something nice in a trade. Added to my "LIST OF THINGS TO DO IN MY FIRST 15 MINUTES OF BEING PRESIDENT" Just like Newt has only mine is more 'realistic' in become reality than him!! ~:D

Gerald, and I think I'll make you Energy Czar. No, I'm not sure what they do, but I guess we can find that out once we get in! WOO!! :D

sky, all together now, SKYPIXIE0 --- VICE PRESIDENT AND ALSO CZAR OF VICE!!! We going to have lots of Czars!! ~:D

Natalie, the safest place a cat can keep important documents(did you make sure to doctor my birth certificate to show I was born in the states instead of Mexico City? Good! Good!! :D) is in the litter box!!

Thank you my Chief of Staff and Pretty Flower Czar!!! :D

Bleue, damn that Idaho!!! ~adds that to list~ And damn you're right, both winners and losers will be turned into Tasti-Snack
!! ~:D

lefty, that's the spirit, just let it settle in and become one with you!! ~:D

(When I start to agree with the people at Foxnews though, I have to turn it off. Weirds me out!! ~:D)

Roger, yes I am1! Fall like into that grey area of the 876th Amendment(all cats shall dance and possibly run for President!!!) :D

heron, I will make a good showing in the debates. I think I can kick Mitt's ass with no sweat.

I know I can outrun Newt. ~nodding~ ~:D
YAY, TINK IS A SHOE IN!! I VOTE FOR TINK! Tink, can you please make into tasty snax all mean cat hating people in NYC, especially in Queens? And feed them to the cats???? Can I be the czar of feeding the tasty snax cat hating people to the cats??? Pleeeeese?
Joanne, YES YOU CAN!! And yes, damn those mean people! !HISSS!! ~:D
@Tinkerertink69

I don't think there has been a Drug Czar with my particular qualifications this will be great. Very definitely I will be needing a pardon or so once I really get rolling.
Anthony, PARDON!! PARDON! PARDON!! :D