PLACES TO GET YOUR HAIR CUT ---
1. Your mom: Unless she's drunk, cause she'll forget where the bowl is.
2. Your Aunty: Again, unless she's drunk, she'll forget where the scissors are.
3. Your imaginary friend: Cause imaginary friends give the best hair cuts!
4. Dora's House of Prostitution and Hair Salon: Oh man, $25 for a hair cut and a blow job, all at the same time! Can't be beat. Or can it? If you go, say Sid sent you for a free Curl but I won't say where!
5. Claud's: Claud has big hands. No wait, he doesn't do hair cuts! Sorry. Say Sid sent you for a free Curl too!
6. Your dad: He might not know how to cut hair except for the buzz cut but he has some great stories of how your mom is a total pyscho bitch!
7. California: Only the best here and if you drive through Nevada, stop by Claud's! Say Sid sent you, get a free Curl! Oh my!
8. Jackson Hole, Wyoming: Nobody does it better than Jack Colligan in Jackson Hole, Wyoming and while you're there, get a blow job from Jack's sister, Francis 'The Grand Tetons'!!
9. Jacka Snip: Booze, bait AND a hair cut!!! Great place to get crabs too!
10. Wanda's in New York: Say Cranky Cuss sent ya and get something, probably slapped!
11. Wayne Newton: He also performs for you!
12. Theodore in Queens: Wander around his museum of great lays in Cleveland while you wait.
13. Jesus Christ: Parts your red roots!
14. Moses: No wait, he parts your red roots! Skip Jesus!
15. Old Man at Bus Stop: If he's drunk, then say, SID SENT ME, and watch him run away screaming!
16. Handy Dandy Home Hair Cut: Just attached to your vaccum and it cuts your hair. DO IT YOURSELF!!!
17. ME!: I don't give good hair cuts but I do them for free! People will laugh and point at you but that's not anything new!
18. YOU!: See #16. People will still laugh at you!
19. God: Why not? If he's busy, ask your mom. She needs something to do since she retired from the prison!
20. Sid: Tell him I sent you for the best hand job since Elvis!
EXTRA SO IT MAKES THIS LIST SO SPECIAL ---
21. ELVIS!: He's not dead just hiding really good! Ask Sid where he's at!
22. Peaches: This could also be added to my next post --- MY GROCERY LIST!
THIS LIST INSPIRED BY: THE NEW INQUIRY and a bottle of Nair!
~Wanders off dejected~