Tinkerertink69

Tinkerertink69
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Your closet, Indiana, France
Birthday
July 16
Title
President and CEO of Your Mom
Company
Your closet
Bio
Smell my Paws! Does that smell like poo to you? Writer? No way! I'm a guy with a cat who knows my passwords and likes to blog!! What? Oops, I mean, I'm a cat who likes to blog. Smell my paws!!! French prostitutes? Only on Tuesdays!! Lets cuddle!!

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Salon.com
JUNE 7, 2012 8:23PM

LOTS OF PLACES TO GET YOUR HAIR CUT --- MAYBE 3!

Rate: 25 Flag

PLACES TO GET YOUR HAIR CUT ---

1. Your mom: Unless she's drunk, cause she'll forget where the bowl is.

2. Your Aunty: Again, unless she's drunk, she'll forget where the scissors are.

3. Your imaginary friend:  Cause imaginary friends give the best hair cuts!

4. Dora's House of Prostitution and Hair Salon: Oh man, $25 for a hair cut and a blow job, all at the same time! Can't be beat. Or can it? If you go, say Sid sent you for a free Curl but I won't say where!

5. Claud's:  Claud has big hands.  No wait, he doesn't do hair cuts! Sorry.  Say Sid sent you for a free Curl too!

6. Your dad: He might not know how to cut hair except for the buzz cut but he has some great stories of how your mom is a total pyscho bitch!

7. California:  Only the best here and if you drive through Nevada, stop by Claud's! Say Sid sent you, get a free Curl! Oh my!

8.  Jackson Hole, Wyoming:  Nobody does it better than Jack Colligan in Jackson Hole, Wyoming and while you're there, get a blow job from Jack's sister, Francis 'The Grand Tetons'!!

9. Jacka Snip: Booze, bait AND a hair cut!!! Great place to get crabs too!

10. Wanda's in New York: Say Cranky Cuss sent ya and get something, probably slapped!

11. Wayne Newton: He also performs for you!

12. Theodore in Queens: Wander around his museum of great lays in Cleveland while you wait.

13. Jesus Christ: Parts your red roots!

14. Moses: No wait, he parts your red roots! Skip Jesus!

15. Old Man at Bus Stop: If he's drunk, then say, SID SENT ME, and watch him run away screaming!

16. Handy Dandy Home Hair Cut:  Just attached to your vaccum and it cuts your hair. DO IT YOURSELF!!!

17. ME!: I don't give good hair cuts but I do them for free! People will laugh and point at you but that's not anything new!

18. YOU!: See #16.  People will still laugh at you!

19. God: Why not? If he's busy, ask your mom. She needs something to do since she retired from the prison!

20. Sid: Tell him I sent you for the best hand job since Elvis!

EXTRA SO IT MAKES THIS LIST SO SPECIAL ---

21. ELVIS!: He's not dead just hiding really good! Ask Sid where he's at!

22. Peaches: This could also be added to my next post --- MY GROCERY LIST!

THIS LIST INSPIRED BY: THE NEW INQUIRY and a bottle of Nair!

EP!! EP!!

NO EP?

~SAD FACE~

~Wanders off dejected~

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Comments

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About 40 years ago Sid told me to cut my own hair and I've been doing it ever since. He also told me to do my own blowjobs but I've never been that lithe. Sorry, Sid.
With a list with 22 picks iwas sure you had gotten a cover shot, dude!

There's just no justice in the world any longer. Thank gawd we still have drugs! (that is if Shaggy didn't use them all!)
sid really gets around.

and mattie - sorry. :-(

:-)
Once every year I shave my head and beard leaving only my mustache and a soul patch... never know when Francis or Wanda might need a ride!! Should be happening sometime toward the end of June... look forward to the change in avatar.
I'd like to nominate this for something. ~r
If I had any hair I'd look up Claud and get me a curl. Or, wait, is that some kind of euphemism for a dried yak penis strap-on? Regardless, if that one dude got an EP for compiling a list of hair salons this post should get a Pulitzer Prize.
@ Nanatehay: Unless Sid is around it will just have to be a Pulhisownitzer Prize. *ahem*
Chicken, yeah, me neither!! WAAA!! ~:D

Amy, Shaggy keeps some in the usual place, Kerry's sock drawer!! :D

jane, Sid is really good!! ~:D

jmac, ~nodding~ Always nice to have a place for peeps to sit!! :D

Joan, I SECOND THE NOMINATION!! ;D

nana, and it has!! Just got the email! Whoo!! ~:D

Yaks need love too!! ~:D
Amy, that too!! TEEHEE!! :D
Good point Amy; as a long-time subscriber to Compulsive Masturbator's Monthly he's got that Prize locked down.
My fave is Curl up and Dye - the last haircut you'll ever need.
Lupe cuts my hair in Mexico, and sometimes she shares a joint with me. Now that's the way to get your hair cut!
nana, man, I really wish someone would pick up and re-start that magazine!! ~nodding~ ~:D

nile, ~nodding~ ~:D

lefty, damn, I forgot about Lupe!! :D
OK I thought this was funny. Then I wandered over to the front page to see if they finally took my birth announcement down and went WHOA! Now this is REALLY funny!
You can come on over to my house.. I cut hair..
HUGGGGGGGGGG
Also, if you go to Dora's (see #4), ask for 4-Hole Annie; she'll keep an eye out for you and make your sideburns look just like Elvis's. R
Is Open Salon a real salon? Or is it really closed?
If you have that vacuum thingy you can attach it to your shop vac, reverse the motor and give YOURSELF a helluva a blow job. They don't tell you that on the infomercial, because they can't. R
I'd totally take a haircut from you. And deal with ensuing laughter. I'll take one for the team.
This is why I have long hair...
Tink,

I'll be on the edge of my seat until you post your grocery list next. :)

XOXOXO

P.S. Please send my best regards to your lovely wife.
EP.. or TP? tr ig pick for cretin! I mean certain. Right.
LOVE this piece, and your wife my girlfriend
Did Claud ever perm your coat, Tink? If so, were any photos taken of the final result?
Cute kitty
R
There's nothing more attractive than a well trimmed pu..... er, cat.....

;-)
.
So funny!!! and conincidental. Judy Wittbold was sitting next to me as we waited for the bus and I looked at her, and then snapped my head back in surprise and shock .
She let a guy here at our complex cut her hair. It was a disaster. When she saw me, she cried
"Iknow...I know...I must have been crazy!!!!"
Maybe she'll write somepoetry. I forwarded this to her.
The haircut post on the cover is attributed to the wrong blogger! It was posted by Autumn Whitefield-Medrano yesterday, and this morning, I'm the only commenter, probably because the EP went to someone else. Give here some cred and love here:

http://open.salon.com/blog/the_beheld/2012/06/07/twenty_places_to_get_your_hair_cut#comment_2968215

Sheesh.
I didn't think Damn Cats needed hair cuts. But maybe I've just had too much Free Beer to concentrate.
Chicago Guy, I've been avoiding the Open for the day and then I was like, I WANNA SEE WHAT'S GOING ON but the Open said, NO WAY DUDE!! For hours!! LOTS OF ERRORS!! PFFFT!! ~:D

Linda, heading over your way now!! ~:D

I need a hair cut!!!

Trudge, damn right!! WOOO!! ~:D

Sirenita, it's closed for today but will be open Tomorrow!! ~:D

Gerald, ~nodding~ oh my yes!! ~:D

Beth, come on over!! ;D

asia, oh come on, I give good hair cuts!! ~;D

Diary, I'm getting ready!! :D

tr ig, I loves you too baby cheese!! ~smooch~ :D

Poor Woman, no pictures, maybe next time! ~:D

Cranky, she's the best!! ~:D

sky, that's a fact!!! ;D

Dianne, the worst decisions in my life has dealt with my hair!! ~:D

heron, NO!!! IT CAN'T BE!!!! I FAVORITED THE HAIR CUT PEOPLE!!! :( :D

Boaner, I just shed mostly!! ~:D