After reading Wish I knew you as a kid's Detailed Timeline of My Unfortunate Sex Life, I thought to myself,

'Self, you could write about your own sex life, not like you haven't done so in the past, hell, about every one of your posts tells something about your thousands… Read full post »

---INTRODUCTION---  

     This summer vacation 2009, I had some fun taking photos down in the basement of a historic brothel in Butte, Montana.

     Before I share the photos taking by me and some others including my pop, I want to give a little(or a… Read full post »

I'm sitting here, watching a moth attracted to the light. It flies in and settles down on the bulb, then decides the heat burning is too much, so it flies away and repeats the pattern over and over.

Stupid moth.

I'm kind of stupid as well. I repeat patterns that are… Read full post »

Ah, late night discussions turning into articles that will inform as well as amuse or confuse.

Last night, I chatted with a good friend(HI NANA!!!) on here about the world as a whole and he brought up  how no one has written any articles on the reculsive and wonderful creature known… Read full post »

I don't remember the year. It may have been 1952. 

Or 1992.

I just remember laying in the bed, my full body exposed to the eyes of whomever walk down the hallway.

The madame told me she would send down a hot one. She told me she had eyes. … Read full post »

I know some of you have been following my "How to find yourself a date in 10 short days" or whatever the series should be named.   I have hundreds if not three messages of people telling me how much success they've had following my articles on dating.

They're telling me that they'… Read full post »

I'm back.

Okay, I'm still on vacation, but I'm like that writer in the field, giving you a view inside my vacation, some creative juices are flowing out, wanting to be free.

So today, my brother and nephew came over to my folks' house to cook and devour some very tasty… Read full post »

Dear readers, and long time lovers of Tink at Midnight....

I'm leaving Friday morning on a jet plane to Fargo, North Dakota and I ain't never coming back.

I want more ads on here and Ed told me, "Tink! I can't do anymore!! I'm giving you all the ads I… Read full post »

Hello my dearest readers.  I know my last reviews of eHarmony and Chemistry.com got some readers excited as I received at least four PMs about it, mostly from lawyers sending me cease and desist orders.

I hope, after following my in depth revie… Read full post »

CLICK ME FOR BIGGER VIEW OF AD! YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO!

To quote the great Reverend Google AdSense as found on Open ---

You have anger?

 

I am proud to be an American.  I can sit here in my secret hideout, hundreds of miles underneath the earth, and say pretty much anything I want to without the fear of being arrested(cause I have nukes!), unless I decide I want to marry my partner, Fernado, then, well, that's bad.

At… Read full post »

 Now remember, don't try this at home unless you got some Jack Daniels or something.  If one of them rockets goes up your ass without some liquor encouragement, well, you know...

It was 1997.  I was standing outside of this town, not even big enough to have a good cockroach infested bar and deli.

It didn’t even have a zip code.  It just had a code.  The zip fell off ten years ago and died a sad, lonely death.

Hell, the local… Read full post »

I was reading some posts by Cindy Ross today, something to do with OS virgins, or whatever.

Her first notice, I was like, YEAH!! KILL THEM SPAMMERS!!! OFF WITH THEIR HEADS. 

I wasn't sure what flagging spammers and virgins had to do with each other but I was all… Read full post »

I am afraid to sign up for this ad thing.

I've seen the results of some of the Gutter Krew signing up. I have seen the ads for JcPenney's showing up.

I have horror stories about JcPenney's that get brought back to the surface from these ads.

The turtle neck… Read full post »

My dearest friends and readers,

I took some time off from the hustle and bustle of being an Online Writer, poorly as I may write, I do have enough fans that if I died, at least two people would show up at my funeral, maybe five, if there was free food… Read full post »

Oh the rememberances of days gone by, when real celebrities would rush through Hollywood, do days and weeks of champagne and cocaine, maybe kill their spousal unit and/or prostitute/piece on the side but the studios had teams and would clean up the crime scene and hide the bodies. … Read full post »

Today is Father's day and most of you have posted some sweet(or not so sweet) tribute to your fathers. 

I was reminded by someone who shall remain nameless(HI SUZIE!!!) in another post that while I was writing posts… Read full post »

I know what you’re saying, right now, you’re saying, “Tink, you’re already married to the most wonderful woman in the world! Why are y… Read full post »

NUMMY! NUMMY! NUMMY! ICE CREAM NUMMY! PURRRR! EVERY DAY SHOULD BE ICE CREAM SOCIAL DAY!!!! PURR! NUM! NUM! PURRRRRR!

You ever been so burned out on life, sex, drugs, rock and roll  and everything that you just want to come in, heavy metal suicide playing hard in you… Read full post »

In case you missed last night's interview with Bill O'Reilly and have come straight here because you heard there would be mentioned 'anal beads' and 'The President's ass' then please, click here, and come back after reading what has been described as 'The best faux interview/… Read full post »

So I'm cruising around Open and I see Mr. Kerry Lauerman has posted some kind of contest.   I still say nobody spins like Bill O'Reilly.  Nobody. I've tried and the best I could come up with is a 5 minute porno I call, "Dancing in suds with a naked Bill O'Reilly" … Read full post »

This being Sunday morning, I decided to write something a little naughty, erotica for the neurotica, so to speak, so before you go to church, pull out your best friend and/or lover, put something romantic on the CD player(maybe some Gwar or Megadeth) and make some noise.

This is called, "I… Read full post »