Actually, I'm just waiting for the Bus. Or Godot. Or perhaps Godot driving the bus.
Maybe he'll let me drive.
It's interesting the blossoming of really profound and stimulating posts I would have missed had i had my hip re-replaced on Wednesday, as scheduled.
It leaves me with an unscheduled time to think.
But also a great deal of fallout from NOT having the surgery
Not the least of which is a hip joint that makes farting and creaking noises
and hurts like stabbing myself with an icepick, whenever I move it.
There is also a certain amount of relief.
I knew on checking into the hospital, the night before the surgery
That I wouldn't survive the operation.
Que Sera, Sera
I've had a foot in both worlds since at least last summer.
What turned out to be heart trouble that my then doctor, since replaced, said was my imagination
Brought on by the fact of my father having had the same heritable condition.
Time has lost a great deal of its sequentiality
It has always been just “NOW” - I would say since last summer,
but since its always BEEN “now”
who really knows.
It's NOW now.
It has brought into focus a meme of mine
Lawyers and Warriors
Lawyers are those who live primarily in the Mind, whose existence consists of clock ticks of Realty, symbolic properties and values of all experience, measured, stored, to be traded with others. The universe is logically and rationally limited and ordered. Symbolic manipulation through language and other media are the basis of civilization and objectivity. Everything is an Object. Everything is Dead. ( unchanging) The Will overcomes the inertia and allows “Life”
Warriors are those who live in the Spirit. In the moment. In the NOW. The Spiritual Self is the accretion of experiential learning. The universe is magic, created anew each instant, refreshed from archetypal patterns with roots in the collective subconscious. All life is personal, all perception is part of self. It is the basis of self and self awareness, the feeling of an individual existence. It is subjective. All things are alive, if only through your awareness of them. Accretions of repetitive pattern give rise to the state of “no-Mind”, being without thinking. One is moved “by the will of GOD” ( for practical discussion, call it the accreted habits of your lifetime. )
So, here am I in the NOW.
The observation I wished to make is about the difficulty of communication between those who live in the mind, and those who live in the spirit.
I lean toward the warrior mode by nature
But I understand most Lawyer talk.
I understand how difficult it is for the western mind to wrap itself around the lifestyle and reality of those “on Native Time”
Mind is full of Deadlines.
Schedules must be met
Appointments must be kept.
THINGS MUST GET DONE!
To which the Native Warrior Spirit replies:
I am here, I am now, I am experiencing.
I do not wish to participate in YOUR world-
If you wish, I will share mine- but not for you to remake it.
The life of Mind is a game- a game with rules.
Played with deadlines that must be met.
Winners and Losers
A key thing that Lawyers learn is the value of running out the clock.
The idea is that in the contest for power over a collective “good”( what mind has it in mind to acquire)
Taking possession by symbolic logic and word manipulation, and then holding it not by winning, but by stalling to prevent losing.
The life of Spirit is feelings and experience. Words are not the reality of life. Words are not vehicles of manipulation and power over others. Life is shared experience. Words are simply a very poor way to attempt to share experience. Life is not a game. Life IS. you do not “win” you do not “lose”, you experience ( Little big man's grandfather's death song”thank you for all my victories, thank you for all my defeats”) Experience is the only thing from life that you can keep from incarnation to incarnation, and the way you keep that experience together and coherent is Integrity. Living in such a manner that there is nothing in your experience that causes you to feel shame or guilt or fear such that you cast that experience off as “not part of my self”
How different the two worlds.
The world of the mind where all is “property and value, lived within a time limit,
No ultimate goal, no ultimate reason for being except to assert your self, to WIN.
Ultimately, to win at any cost to your integrity
to your sense of who you are
of what is your worth.
The world of Spirit, the ultimate integrity of life as one in the eternal NOW
Death and Dishonor.
Life and Integrity
The one Reality itself. The other a fleeting illusion.