It occurred to me the other day that I have neglected a large segment of the population here on Almosta Ranch....our dog pack.  So I decided to do a few blogs featuring our canine children.  Let me apologize in advance to the fans of JFK's book, Profiles in Courage, for ripping off his title.

Having decided to write about our dogs, I was faced with the question of which dog to write about first.  My "harping" buddy, Linda Seccespina solved that problem.  I knew if I didn't feature our newest little addition that Linda would hunt me down.

So, without further ado, I give you.....Tater Tot, aka: Psycho Bitch!

(above) Tater's glamor shot, taken exclusively for this  blog.

As many of you know, Tater came to our home on a cold December night about a week before Christmas. It was twenty degrees outside with a strong North wind blowing and we discovered this little hunk of dog curled up under the truck, half frozen.  Of course, Mel being Mel, she rushed the scraggly little critter into the house, wrapped it in a warm blanket, and heated some dog food for her.

Tater in "Intensive Care"

Tater survived being abandoned on that dark road in the dead of Winter and we spent the next two weeks trying to find out who her owners were and if they might be looking for her.  Had I known then what I know now, I would not have bothered searching for her prior owner.  It is clear to me now that someone dumped this hussy on purpose. She probably got on their last nerve just like she has mine.

Well after two weeks of searching, Mel gave up and made the fateful announcement: "Looks like we have another member of the family."

 The look I gave Tater when Mel made her announcement.

The look Tater gave me at that same instant....

Yes, the battle lines had been drawn.  She didn't care for me and I was not fond of her. You see, the trouble with Tater is that she has a two pound body wrapped around a hundred pounds of attitude.

Tater is the official Diva-in-residence of Almosta Ranch. She walks around like she owns the damn place and all the other dogs suffer just because Mel has a strict rule against them eating Tater....they can't retaliate when she bullies them.

The main object of Tater's ire is our Alpha female, Mollie. Now Mollie is a Lab/Pit bull mix that weighs about 110lbs and until the arrival of Tater, she was the undisputed ruler of the dog pack.

I was amazed the first time that Mollie walked up to Tater and took the plastic bone that Tater had been playing with.  Now this is accepted behaviour for the Alpha.....whatever she wants, she gets.  Unfortunately Tater failed to get that memo because she immediately launched herself onto Mollie and began to furiously chew the larger dog's leg.

Mollie gingerly lifted her paw with Tater still attached and looked at Mel with a look that said: "Please mom, can I eat her now?"

Mel gave Mollie "the look" that needed no interpretation and successfully stopped Mollie from having a Chihuahua sandwich on the spot.

Of course right away Tater picked up on the fact that Mel was going to protect her and she became insufferable.  She now spends her days patrolling the grounds around Almosta Ranch and barking and growling madly whenever some other poor beast earns her displeasure. Even poor Sherman, the gentle giant of Almosta has had to suffer through one of Tater's temper tantrums. 

It didn't take but a few days of this sort of behaviour for me to coin my own name for Tater: Psycho Bitch.  The other dogs are in complete agreement.  If she intimidates the larger dogs, she absolutely terrifies poor Booker who is only slightly larger than she is.

So there you have it....Tater Tot, the one-time homeless pooch, now lives a royal life and rules the dog pack of Almosta Ranch with an iron paw.  Do not despair for the other poor doggies though because I have discreetly put out the word that if the pack catches mom gone to town and decides to stage a coup, I will hide the body and tell Mel that Tater ran away.  Damn psycho bitch!