We drive in silence.

Crossing the Bay bridge I see the city, lights winking at me from between the trusses as if she harbors a secret.

Time seems to move in both slow motion and warp speed. I want to hold on. I want to let go.

I… Read full post »

This is a long one, so sit back, relax, and have a cup of coffee with me. I wrote this three years ago, we no longer live in Northern California and I no longer smoke. My children, however, still sound like stampeding elephants. 

 *        &nbs… Read full post »

My body rocks, dumb except for the motion, a motion it performs automatically, without knowing how to stop the jarring sobs it attempts to soothe.

My lips barely whisper a tune meant to soften a pain unbearably sharp.

My face, stricken, still as stone, sadness and exhaustion weighing heavy under… Read full post »

In 2008 I was fortunate enough to visit the country of Georgia,  the impressions made on me there will last a lifetime.

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The taxi speeds its way down an alley mean… Read full post »

Something has happened in the past few years, I’ve morphed, from a youthful girl to a woman who is a little world weary. I used to shine and feel exuberant, now I’m a little tired. The transition is natural enough, with age we lose naïveté and gain wisdom, lose dewy radiance… Read full post »

There are those people in high school, the ones I always thought of as the golden ones, the ones who had it together, they were smart, beautiful, popular, confident, pretty much everyone but me…I was awkward at best. I never basked in the glow of youth. Truthfully, I just never quite… Read full post »

You don’t look like an alcoholic.

Well, come on in, curl up in that chair, it’s a good one, comfortable and the afternoon sun comes in through that window, will keep you warm. Have a cup of coffee and sit awhile I could tell you stories that would make your hair… Read full post »

Again, another tale from California three years ago.  Happy Monday!

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In Northern California, Tilden Park is where the Little Farm and the hiking trails are. T… Read full post »

Alone on the square floating dock in the middle of lake, I look out and see the shoreline, it’s so far away and there’s nothing there. The heat of the midday sun beats down on my neck. I smell the fabric softener from the towel. One corner is turned up, with… Read full post »

So, the one where I was potty training… 

                                         &n… Read full post »

After letting a cooler head prevail, I agree with Beverly. Although I do LOVE to swear (it just makes me feel better sometimes), I do not need to demean myself or my work by stooping and becoming crass.

Thank you all for the understanding and indulgence.

S

You asked:… Read full post »

Most days are spent in the earnest attempt to enjoy time with my children while expanding their horizons, other days are for errands, those are the days I dread. My children, like all others, have no patience for the grocery store. The place is filled with “We’re not getting that”,… Read full post »

The second divorce was not as dramatic as the first. The worst part was the feeling of being absolutely abandoned by this person who was supposed to be a partner (but hey, it's divorce, right?) and having to leave the state of California. I wrote this just days before my move in… Read full post »

My hand lightly moves over the objects of my life. The lamp that shed a glaring light as my first husband asked for divorce. The table at which I sat moments before my second husband proposed. The chair that gently rocked as I nursed my infant children. I can feel the… Read full post »

My move to Georgia came under difficult circumstances. I wrote this in the summer of 2008, I had just moved to Georgia and spent a lot of time alone, outside, trying to get my feet back under me. Two years later, I am beginning to walk (metaphorically) with wobbly legs, but… Read full post »

I wrote this three years ago, Kai and Lola had just turned three and Mama needed help...oh, and before you write in...yes, I know that Montessori is not a river, this is supposed to be humor.

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There are many… Read full post »

My first marriage ended in 2000. I have never written about the end and only discussed it with my closest friends.  I am surprised 10 years later, it feels like a lifetime ago and like it happened to someone else, but the moments will always be clear and lurking in the… Read full post »

I wrote this just after my move in 2008. This was an incredible experience that has changed the way I see things here.

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 Georgia is caught in another time…no, let me start over, that’s not exactly true. These little towns in… Read full post »

2009, A year in moments with the twostinkybabies: 

(Driving down the road)

“Look Mama, a raccoon, he’s so pretty! Why isn’t he moving?”

“He’s just sleeping sweetie”  

“C’mon Lola blow your nose”

“I don’t wan… Read full post »

We moved from California to Georgia a year and a half ago. That move was one of the hardest moves I've made. I wrote a lot during that time.

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We slowly descend, surrounded by clouds. Down a little lower….there it is.

“L… Read full post »

I have no idea what I’m doing. I see pictures of families, the pretty ones, the perfect ones, the ones that look like they belong in a glossy magazine, I sigh. I see pictures of women, mothers specifically, that look rested, calm, in control, these mothers make Martha Stewart look disorganized,… Read full post »