hi all, there's been some very good sex writing on OS recently, incl a phenomenal post "what it feels like to be in a sexless marriage". which is burning up the chart with hits and responses. quite impressive.

a few yrs ago Alternet started posting sex essays. for me its hit or miss, some of them seem silly or irrelevant or disagreeable, but others really hit my intellectual G spot, if you know what I mean, wink. dead on!! today I collected up a list. it was fun to go through this. I could write entire blog posts on any one of these topics & I may write some things in a bit.

and, if you want to read between the lines, like a sort of cyber/web/rorschach test, these say a little or a lot about me. note that I dont nec. "agree" with these, some I find pretty disagreeable.. maybe some might amuse themselves by guessing which is which. I guess I will write a "follow up" blog with my actual "answers" & reactions. compare them with yours!

in a word, I like the term/label "sex positive". seems to capture it all in a nutshell.

hope others get a kick or a smirk or a thought out of these too.

Is the "L Word" Feminist?
There have been a lot of shout-outs to feminism on the "L Word", albeit not a consistent feminist politics that will please everyone.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/130967/is_the_%22l_word%22_feminist/

Why Being Smart Won't Get You Laid
Your impressive mental prowess won't necessarily get you a date, much less bring you lasting love and fulfillment.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/129887/why_being_smart_won%27t_get_you_laid/

The Zen of Porn: If Pornography Is Everywhere, Is it Nowhere?
The ubiquity of porn has rendered it invisible for most adults. But why has pornographic imagery become such an acceptable part of public culture?
http://www.alternet.org/sex/121604/the_zen_of_porn%3A_if_pornography_is_everywhere%2C_is_it_nowhere/

Sex Work Goes Mainstream on Reality TV
Prostitutes, strippers and porn stars are now as ubiquitous on cable as cops are on network TV. Is that good or bad for sex workers?
http://www.alternet.org/sex/116321/sex_work_goes_mainstream_on_reality_tv/

Are Male Fantasies of "Girl-on-Girl" Action Messing with Women's Sexuality?
Nowadays, you're considered an uptight prude if you don't want to fondle another girl solely for a man's pleasure.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/122510/are_male_fantasies_of_%22girl-on-girl%22_action_messing_with_women%27s_sexuality/

What a Choice! Sex With a Sleaze for $100,000 or Writing for Peanuts
Sites like SugarDaddy.com lure young women by offering them far more money than they could get in most professions. What's wrong with this picture?
http://www.alternet.org/sex/77923/what_a_choice!_sex_with_a_sleaze_for_%24100%2C000_or_writing_for_peanuts/

Why Men Do Stupid Things: The Psychological Appeal of Prostitutes
A psychotherapist explains what might go on in the deeper recesses of the minds of men like Eliot Spitzer.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/79635/why_men_do_stupid_things%3A_the_psychological_appeal_of_prostitutes/

Sex With Emily
In the first edition of a new AlterNet feature, self-made sexpert Emily Morse explains everything you ever wanted to know about Craigslist dating, no-strings sex and the 'oxytocin excuse.'
http://www.alternet.org/sex/32973/sex_with_emily/?page=1

Is Monogamy Natural?
A lifetime of love versus a quick roll with a stranger. It's funny how we can have two seemingly opposite urges at the same time.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/57724/is_monogamy_natural/

Can Women Separate Love and Sex?
Sex, like eating, is a biological drive, and you will lose your mind if you repress it for too long. But some women stave off the need much longer than others.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/56220/can_women_separate_love_and_sex/

Swingtown: Opening the American Marriage
It's nice to live in an era where sexual freedom means I don't have to feel that a night out with friends is incomplete without an orgy.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/93630/swingtown%3A_opening_the_american_marriage_/

Caveman Sex: How Evolutionary Psych Pushes Sexist Stereotypes
The watered-down evolutionary psychology prevalent in pop culture enables some men to rationalize sexist double standards about relationships.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/104149/caveman_sex%3A_how_evolutionary_psych_pushes_sexist_stereotypes/

"Screwing Their Brains Out": Plato's Retreat and the Rise of Swinging
A new film about Plato's Retreat shows how the swinger's club helped challenge gender stereotypes and regressive ideas about sex.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/137111/%22screwing_their_brains_out%22%3A_plato%27s_retreat_and_the_rise_of_swinging/

Is Open Marriage the Modern Couple's Answer to Infidelity?
Why does open marriage work for some married couples and destroy others? The answer could be that for it to work you need to be in an extremely healthy relationship.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/54062/is_open_marriage_the_modern_couple%27s_answer_to_infidelity/

Three's Company
What the heck is polyamory, and is it a legitimate way to sustain a romantic relationship?
http://www.alternet.org/sex/34934/three%27s_company/

The Ethical Slut Returns: Into Threesomes, Foursomes, Moresomes?
The co-author of a cult classic about open relationships talks sex communes, romantic one-night stands, and offering chicken soup to lovers.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/138195/the_ethical_slut_returns%3A_into_threesomes%2C_foursomes%2C_moresomes/

The Case for Open Relationships
Polyamorous relationships need trust and communication -- not so different from monogamous ones.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/70461/the_case_for_open_relationships/

Why Can't Tila Tequila be Polyamorous?!
If Tila Tequila didn't have to choose between boys and girls, we could feel less guilty watching her show.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/73908/why_can%27t_tila_tequila_be_polyamorous!/

How to Make an Open Relationship Work
It's surprisingly simple: think carefully about what you're afraid of -- then talk about it with your partner.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/111803/how_to_make_an_open_relationship_work/

Making Open Relationships Work
Greta Christina reviews "Opening Up", a new guide to non-monogamous relationships.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/125740/making_open_relationships_work/

One Woman's Journey to Conquer Her Fear of Porn
Ayn Carrillo-Gailey's new book, Pornology, chronicles a self-described good girl's exploration of the world of porn -- an industry whose fastest growing audience is women.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/55425/one_woman%27s_journey_to_conquer_her_fear_of_porn/

A Brief History of the Kama Sutra
The Kama Sutra is far more complex than a mere listing of contortionist sexual positions; it provides a manual for living the good life.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/86582/a_brief_history_of_the_kama_sutra/

Mating in Captivity: Reconciling the Erotic and the Domestic
Could more distance be the key to keeping the passion in long-term relationships?
http://www.alternet.org/sex/68940/mating_in_captivity%3A_reconciling_the_erotic_and_the_domestic/

Why Relationship Sex Is Boring
The very things that nurture love -- comfort, stability, safety -- can extinguish sexual desire.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/104165/why_relationship_sex_is_boring_/

Are Sex and Love Mutually Exclusive?
In most cultures, the urge for sexual adventure is difficult to reconcile with the comforts of companionship and domesticity.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/126539/are_sex_and_love_mutually_exclusive/

Sex Toys and the Technology of Orgasm
A new documentary offers up a disturbing history of the first vibrators and shows that sex toys aren't just for pleasure -- they're political.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/64355/sex_toys_and_the_technology_of_orgasm/

Diane Sawyer Doesn't Like What I Do
My interview on ABC made one thing clear: In our society sex workers are still presented as tragic, lost, Dickensian characters.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/83058/diane_sawyer_doesn%27t_like_what_i_do/

Why Everyone Loves Hot, Smart Older Women
The word "desperation" has disappeared from the definition of "cougar"; words like smart, successful and funny have taken its place.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/102547/why_everyone_loves_hot%2C_smart_older_women/

Why I'm Happy I Became a Prostitute
Some of the nicest men I've ever met were my clients. We must move beyond cartoonish depictions of villainous, lustful men victimizing vulnerable women.
http://www.alternet.org/sex/148948/why_i%27m_happy_i_became_a_prostitute/