Susan Faludi has another book out. I interviewed her years ago when her first one (I think) came out; back when publishers still subsidized book tours. Lingering impressions are distilled here.
Faludi for Faludi
That's who Susan Faludi is, a feminist selling books on feminism. She makes good copy and her books are sound. I just wish the women who write these kind of books walked the walk of women they say they champion.
Faludi lives a professional single woman's life complete with designer shoes and purses she wears to speaking engagements and book signings. She can speak about this segment-that's who she represents. When she speaks about the rest of us, she sounds much like her foremothers did.
Fact is, the majority of pioneering women in the 60's and 70's didn't integrate their lives with raising children; a fact that factors into why today's women have to kiss their kids goodbye in the morning, go to work and pay through the nose for daycare.
These pioneering women weren't concerned about that. They wanted to don 3 piece suits and run with the boy/bulls. They did and do. Faludi is one of them. They don't bring home the bacon, they order out and have it delivered. The rest of us bring it home, fry it, clean the greasy pan, read a bedtime story, organize baths, make lunches, collapse in bed and repeat the next day. Passionate sex with hubby? What's that?
Ms. Faludi walks the walk of a segment of women. She speaks in their tongue. For the rest, I'd like today's feminists to pay more attention to raising the next generation. For moms working, how to get decent childcare that doesn't eat up salaries. Or how to stay home raise the kids and not be penalized by Social Security that gives homemakers NO credit for work rendered raising the next generation. And I won't even get into the laws that don't protect this segment of women when husbands decide to 'trade' up.
This fact remains: women still plummet into poverty when marriages break up while Exs' suffer no blip in economic status. This fact is not a crowning glory of feminism. Why aren't all these parity benefitting women---many now partners in law firms-circling the wagons around their sisters in need of protection from this economic reality unchanged in 40 years?
Perhaps it's because this segment of women aren't sisters of women like Faludi. They're housewives, another segment altogether. Make no mistake, I love and appreciate the parity we've gained. Without Title IX, my two younger daughters would not have played college ball. Without parity, the rights of my body and my daughters might not be ours to decide. But I did feel 'dropped' back when I dropped out of my profession to raise my girls. I know lots of women who feel just like me.
When I get tongue-in-cheek about all the 'benes' feminism brought, this scene always pops up into my head. Two husbands living in today's world are bonding over beers and talking about feminism. Their dialogue goes something like this:
hubby #1 "So how much does your wife make?"
hubby #2 answers.
hubby #1 "That much, huh? And she's a gourmet cook?
hubby #2 nods.
hubby #1 Geez, mine only makes meatloaf. Maybe I'll buy her another Martha Stewart cookbook."
hubby #2 "They all love Martha Stewart."
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Joan H.
sagemerlin
Jane Brogan
emma peel
dirndl skirt
Caitlin Kelly
Salon.com
Comments
r~
and thanks for reading!
Emma,
That you use the word 'downtrodden' to describe this career track speaks volumes to your point of view---
Elizabeth Warren was/is a working mom and she did write a book in the 90's that feminists loathed simply because she spoke the truth---2 career track parents 'ain't' all it's cracked up to be----financially or emotionally because couples end up paying more taxes, women end up giving their checks to daycare and also tend to be the one managing these 2 careers, outside & inside the home.
I just hope younger women include this reality in their research/writing and I'd especially like to see women who are walking this walk talk/write about it more than they do.
You can't write what you don't know.
Had more women walked this walk, our daycare -40 years after the 2nd rise of feminism-would be in much better shape than it is.
Gloria and Susan don't have kids/marriages to juggle and by the time Friedan made a name for herself, she was over raising a family... a not so positive experience if her writings are any indication....
I have 3 daughters-all on the verge of combining their young successful lives with children----i am quite certain the conversations they have with their mom will reflect this conundrum when their reality shifts and not before. Why should it? There's no interest until it hits home and it will if they chose this dual track. And if they don't, I will be there reminding them what happens to lots of women when they give up their paychecks to raise their kids. Forewarned is forearmed....one can only hope.
It ain't pretty----
...and most wives do get screwed financially if hubbie trades up, there is serious inequality.
the system s rigged to help those who hold the purse strings-period- If that's a woman, sobeit but it usually isn't---For me it's not even a gender issue---it's about economic power that housewives and househusbands don't have....it's a derivative job with derivative benefits & I'd like to see this society norm shift--in 40 years of fighting for parity, we haven't shifted it yet....