Can you snort a skidmark?

http://www.timesunion.com/local/article/Cops-Drug-found-in-underwear-1016462.php
"Johnny Luis Cantu of Arizona, is accused of carrying $170,000-worth of cocaine sewn in his underwear and was arrested in a routine drug investigation at the bus terminal, Albany County sheriff?s officials said."

I want to know~~exactly how "routine" was this investigation.
                                                                   
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Isn't this what don't ask  don't tell really means?

http://www.elpasotimes.com/news/ci_17407456?_requestid=9977154
"It is the kind of wall insulation everyone in El Paso would love to have -- cold or hot.

Workmen fixing broken pipes that burst because of the freezing weather two weeks ago found a bundle of money inside a wall.

Police would not say how much, but an official knowledgeable about the case said the amount is just shy of $1 million."

There's a 3 choice poll there.
Of course I said to keep your mouth shut about it for a while.
                                                               

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SOS!!  SOS!!  Oh, no. It's just Brillo

http://www.phillyburbs.com/news/local/courier_times/courier_times_news_details/article/28/2011/february/17/man-acquitted-in-7-eleven-robbery.html
"Tim has always steadfastly maintained his innocence," said his attorney, Louis Busico. "This case proves that eyewitness accounts are not always reliable." 
                                                                   
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More parents ought to care more deeply about their children's education.
If worse comes to worst, at least they could stand outside in one of those statue of liberty tax costumes.
http://www.tampabay.com/news/humaninterest/article1152321.ece
TAMPA — Head hanging low, he stood near an East Tampa street corner for nearly four hours Wednesday afternoon.

James Mond III, 15, wore a sign around his neck with a message:

"I did 4 questions on my FCAT and said I wasn't going to do it … GPA 1.22 … honk if I need (an) education."

People honked. Lots of people.
                                                                 
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Pulled 'em right out, he did!!
                                                                           
http://www.click2houston.com/news/26913666/detail.html
"Christopher Harding, 23, has been charged with injury to a disabled person."
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OK, buddy. Hand over the gerbil.

http://www.heraldtribune.com/article/20110215/ARTICLE/110219859/2416/NEWS
"The judge sent Neil Lansing to jail, where corrections deputies conducting a routine search in a cellblock found part of a condom sticking out of his rectum, the sheriff's office said.

According to sheriff's officials, the condom contained: 17 round blue pills, one cigarette, six matches, one flint, one empty syringe with an eraser over the needle, one lip balm container, one additional unused condom, a receipt from CVS pharmacy and a paper coupon."
                                                                                                                                   
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Could he have been charged with one count of feliney cunnilingus?
                                                                  

http://www.buffalonews.com/city/police-courts/courts/article344661.ece
"Acting City Judge Philip M. Marshall found Gary L. Korkuc, 52, not guilty of misdemeanor animal cruelty and criticized as legally flawed the state's century-old Agriculture and Markets Law under which he was charged. Marshall also noted police wrongly accused Korkuc of marinating the cat, named Navarro, with plans to eat it."
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If anyone sees OEsheepdoggiedoodoo,  you'd better warn him about this guy and his lawyer.

http://www.newstimes.com/news/article/Lawyer-for-man-accused-of-sexually-assaulting-1018962.php
"If this was a guy and a sheep in Litchfield, and I've had a few of those cases, this would not have gotten nearly the media attention it has," said Ralph Crozier, who represents 63-year-old Marian Wegiel.
                                                                   
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See ya