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XJS AND ME

XJS AND ME
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Hey, You
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keep my own with several personalities
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My bio is degradable Official litter changer Don't give a damner Not subject or vulnerable to judgemental assholes. Happily born aqain single Gym rat Golf rat Fishing rat Just plain old rat

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Salon.com
MAY 18, 2011 8:55PM

Back in the U.S.A. Part VI

Rate: 7 Flag

Since everything between Nina and myself was as it ought to be for everyone in love, we went on being together and doing the things lovers do who are also friends.

 

We went places together, did things together and even did things like play tennis with those little wooden racquets.

We were complete, in love, friends and companions.

Our age difference had ceased to matter early on.

Everything about us was right.

We talked together. We walked together.

We played house together. 

We made love and talked and laughed together at the same time.

 

It was a couple of weeks after Nina had gone back down to L.A. for her mother's "wedding" as we were walking south on Masonic to go the Drogstore to eat.

Nina suddenly stopped and stood behind me, clearly frightened of something.

She said that she had seen her brother on the street and didn't want him to see her.

From the things she told me about her family, he wasn't the type to come to the Haight so, we just knew that he had come up there to find her.

 

As it turned out, the cop her mother had married was a typical angry, hateful and controlling type and convinced her mother that Nina should be back "home", as bad as home life had been for her. 

So, he had sent her brother to find her.

We found out later that the girl that we saw on the street had been trying to help them find us.

 

There are those who I mentioned earlier that aren't able to see or understand the emotions of love and must force their cold and unfeeling ways on to a situation they're not a part of.

This was Nina's family.

Her mother gave in to the bullying and controlling of her new cop husband and, soon they found where we lived together, happily and content to just be together.

Unlike those kinds of people, we got along, saw each other as equals and shared an easy tenderness.

 

One day her brother came to knock at the door to our house.

I never asked how they found us butt, I did have a car with tags after all.

I answered the door and went outside to talk with him.

He was very obviously embarrassed.

He told me that the cop his mother had known about Nina and me from that girl we saw on Haight St.

He said that this guy was going to make trouble and do what he could to either get Nina to move back down to her mother's or would see about having me arrested for whatever.

I let him come in and, the three of us sat and talked about all this.

He told Nina that he didn't want to be involved in all this and, since Nina had told him about having someone when she went home for the 'wedding", he knew that things were good between us.

 

He told Nina that he'd say he didn't find us and that maybe it would die down.

He hugged his sister and promised to try to help, then he left.

 

We sat and talked and cussed the laws and the hateful people who tried to use them to mess with people's lives. Most of them were angry little people who seemed jealous of someone who had something good, whether it was things or what Nina and I had.

We were in this spot because we were in love and wanted to be together.

We weren't two spur of the moment people who wanted whatever just for now, even though we met like we did. Meeting like we did gave us something holding us from the beginning.

We wanted a life together and, what we had was good.

 

Her brother came back just a few days later and said that the cop warned him that Nina had to be back at her mother's within the next two or three days or he would pull some strings to have me busted and have her brought back.

 

We stayed up all night talking about what we could do and how to get away from this cop.

It was obvious that we couldn't stay in the Haight or, for that matter, anywhere in Calif.

And, if we went back to the midwest, it would be across state lines.

 

What do twisted, hateful people get out of doing these things to others.

All we wanted was to spend our lives together in all the ways that people like us should.

 

There's no better way to describe that night between us than this~~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kztarnoZFEc&feature=related

We were always like this.

We touched. We held each other. We kissed and laughed about it.

We were happy.

We would walk across the room for no other reason than to touch each other.

 

Two days later, her brother came back for her.

Nina wouldn't go with him and I didn't want her to go.

Finally, after a lot of tears and holding on to each other, we decided that I would take her back to L.A.

We would go in a couple of days.

I knew some people in Tujunga and, we would go there so I didn't have to go to her mother's house.

I don't know what I would have done and this guy is a cop.

If it wouldn't have taken me away from Nina forever, I wouldn't have cared.

 

One more night being free and in love and in our own world.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ddRWrzb-DO4&feature=related

 

We drove down to L.A. as if in a death march.

The joy we felt with each other was beaten down with apprehension.

I don't think there was a time the entire trip when we didn't hold hands.

We just couldn't be sure of what our future would be.

She didn't want to go and I couldn't let her.

 

We went to my friends' in Tujunga. Nobody knew about them so, we had some time together.

I remember their house. I remember the trip.

I remember everything about the day.

There were two little cabins in their backyard. I would stay in one two years later.

Nina and I wanted to be together one more time.

We went back to one of the cabins and just sat there and looked into each others' eyes.

Neither of us had to tell the other butt, still we told about our love and all the things we meant to each other.

It was so good and so sad at the same time when we made love that last time.

 

Again I got a taxi for her as I didn't dare go to her mother's house. I didn't know what I or others would do.

We didn't deserve this.

I went back to Wisconsin to be sure that the cop wouldn't play cop games and have me arrested for whatever sick little games they play.

Over the next year and a half, we would talk on the telephone for hours.

It never ceased to be this way~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eKPmB6aTuRs&feature=related

 

I missed her so, every bit as she missed me.

I still do. More than ever.

 

I would come back to California two years later.

I would come back to find Nina.

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Comments

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geez.... 30 minutes to get on here..Good post and rated with hugs
I don't think it's a good post at all.
In fact, I think the enitire story has gone from wonderful to deeply hurting.
yeah, thirty minutes to get here - well, what happened when you did go back? write soon. ..

sorry that you are hurting - XJS - at least it is a reminder that you had something worthy in your life. some people never do, you know?
Yes, Rolling. I guess I was fortunate in the respect.
Better to have loved then...well, you know the line!!

Rated.
Oh XJS, I'm so sad that you're hurting, time doesn't change love or pain. Just because it happened, doesn't mean it's okay. I don't have any magic words that will take away the pain, it's okay to cry and be sad when it comes up.

I honor your sorrow,
Bleue
Strong narrative, XJS. Whew.
Losing someone you love is always sad. What's worse is the angst you have kept all these years. Sentimental and strong writing, XJS.
Writing what seemed to be at first just a memoir-ish account of a rough time I had, I was surprised to find how emotionally explosive I became reliving the story to tell it. I get where you are now with this.