Not my thing. I don't really like things that are noisy or that I have to measure. Tools seem to be such a male territory that to look at them thru a female perspective reveals a whole new world.
I have just come from a wrestling match with an electric screwdriver. I am hot, sweaty and frustrated. I just hate to have to deal with all this. At first I think of it as a challenge and then as a war and now in defeat I am just limp. I want things to go together magically.
I got the first leg of the table on easily. The second leg is just impossible. I finally got a screw into the slot only to hear it all collapse as I was trying to turn it right side up and I am mad. Mad at the world and myself. Mad at anyone and anything. Screw it all.
Saws are the same way. When I was limbing the tree out back it was fun at first. Then the saw got stuck. Then the branch ripped down the trunk and fell on top of me. Then I got disgusted with the whole mess and finally with superstrength I finished the job and I am proud.
Oh I could hire someone, ask for help or take my time and learn a little bit about tools. However I am stubborn. I just want it all to work easily and with a few bats of my eyelashes I want the work to be done. It isn't possible in this material world. It takes muscle and balance to stand on your head and screw some stupid metal thing into a hole.
I don't like to measure either. I like to eyeball things. "Measure twice and cut once." How about measure never and get it all wrong and have to do it over and over again. Isn't the definition of insanity to do the same thing over and over and expect different results. I must have forced that electric screwdriver into that stripped slot on that stupid screw a hundred times and as it whorled too fast or too slow I cursed it every time.
I just want to get a hammer and destroy things. Just bang away at this stupid table until it is a pile of slivers. At least it isn't one of those nightmare Ikea projects where the directions have no words and you swear that the Swedes have a curse on us all.
The only thing worse that doing these tool projects by myself is asking some guy to do it for me. Then I have to watch while either he does it without any effort at all or he battles the same way I do and makes it even a worse mess than it already is.
Now I have an old table with one leg in the middle of my room. Geez. I want to get a hammer and some nails and just start pounding but I know what will happen to the darn nails. They will bend just as they are getting embeded into the wood and I will have to pound them over on their side and curse some more.
I know not all women feel this way. Here are some videos of a great little worker bee who has all pink tools. Even her extension cords are pink. She just has too much fun. She gives me hope that there is a girl way to approach tools and I just have to let it happen.
Here is one of her year in review videos. I feel better already after watching her. There is always hope.
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Ralph Melcher
femme forte
All the Single Ladies
Kathryn O'Hehir
Cathy GF
Michelle Motoyoshi
Salon.com
Comments
I love the way this read. Would like to see that one legged wonder.
And yes, the Swedes (and their tiny meatballs) are out to get us.
fernsy...The table is on the floor here in a heap waiting to be given to someone with more patience and skills than I have.
Walter...getting older is definitely part of it all but I have never really liked noisy things like saws and electric anythings.
Today I hate my lawnmower, it works great but I have 1/4 acre lot and even though I mowed early I'm wiped out from the heat. I want a lawn mower that mows while I'm indoors with a remote control and glass of ice water. Or I need... a seasonal husband.
Still, you can learn these things. There are several books; browse Amazon for "home repair for women." Heck, browse your local public library, especially if they have online catalogs. There's a cable channel called DIY that show how these things are done. You may even find community college or night school classes to teach how to do repairs.
I will warn you, though, you should learn these from women who know how to do repairs. Men who do these things won't want to teach; they'll do it for you and mutter if you ask questions. I know; I'm a chronic White Knight who does these things for the many incompetent women in my life, and although I could teach them how to do these things, they don't want to learn or listen; they want me to finish the repairs and get the hell out of their lives, so they can date attractive and vapid men.
Every adult should know how to fix a table or a chair, cook a meal from raw ingredients, and sew buttons on clothes. That American schools no longer teach this (or parents teach their children) is why Americans will soon be nothing but slaves to the Chinese overlords.
Your article is full of your pain at your incompetence in life. The only cure is to learn skills, practice skills and use skills. Then, once you have those skills, find other lost souls and teach them. Don't expect teachers or educators to do it; in America they're all child abusers and incompetent hacks. Do it yourself and save - not just money, but your soul and your country.