zanelle

zanelle
Location
Alpine, California, United States
Birthday
December 07
Bio
I am here in cyberspace trying to understand the true nature of reality. My artwork can be seen in the blog link below. http://suzannesmith0.wix.com/stucco-by-zanelle#!home/mainPage

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NOVEMBER 12, 2012 7:53PM

My Mom, the Veteran

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                 At 94 years of age this woman has seen it all.  From a small town beginning in Indiana to the big city life in San Diego she has stories that could curl your toes or give you hope.  She is amazing.

                   I feel she is hypervigilant.  That is a term used with people who have PTSD and can't quite be comfortable anywhere.  She is always on the alert and always judging her chances of survival.  Perfectionism isn't even enough as she wants safety too.   My main goal in life is to protect her and I have been here with her for thirteen years doing just that.   She appreciates that.

                  I am not hypervigilant.  I like to drift.  Maybe she spoiled me but I don't see any reason to get all riled up about anything.  She tells of being a Navy Nurse after Pearl Harbor and having a Marine guard go with her as she administrated pain meds to the Japanese prisioners who tried to spit on her and got a gun shoved in their mouth until they calmed down.   I really haven't been traumatized like that. If I had I might be more alert now.

               As it is I like humor.  I think that in the stress of war or in the rush of an emergency room at a hospital or in a fire if you can crack a joke or pat someone on the back with a smile you will be ok.  I have had a little trauma in my life and I know the adrenaline can take over your body and cause permanent changes.  So the trick seems to be to defuse the moment.  Mellow out, Mom.  I love to make you smile.

            She is beginnig to relax a little with me as we solve one problem after another together.  But then today she told me I was free to go if I wanted to....she could hire someone to do what I do.  Thanks Mom.  I'm not leaving you.  We are in this war together and with you fighting and me making peace we will be ok.   Happy Veterans Day.  Try to find the love inside the war.  It is always there holding hands with hope.

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