patricia k's Open Salon Blog

Thanksgiving Every Day

Tue, 24 Nov 2009 23:11:36 -0500

Although we celebrate Thanksgiving once a year, I celebrate it multiple times, if not daily, in my heart. There is so much to be grateful for.....so much to celebrate every day in my life.

I don't want you to think I'm a "holy roller" or some saint....because I'm not. I've sinned too much to even come close, but my sins don't stop me from striving to be a better person or from even hoping that some day I could live a "saintly" life.

Every evening before I fall asleep I say prayers. In those prayers I thank Jesus, Mary, Joseph and all the Saints for watching over my family and me. If they do indeed exist, I am grateful for their protection and grace. My prayers also include prayers of petition where I continually ask for protection for my family members and for everyone else.....in particular, for those who are suffering in some way.

As I run at our local park along the river, I also pray.....not only because I believe prayer is vital, but because it's an opportunity to do so. Praying while I run also keeps my mind from worrying and fretting over the mundane or thinking about that which I have no control over. Praying frees my mind of this world's problems and allows me to experience peace. After I run, I am physically and mentally rested.

My running prayers consist mainly of prayers of petition.....asking for help with this, that and for those whom I love. My last prayer always includes a "Thanksgiving" prayer. Since I'm always asking God for help for myself and for others, it's important that I also thank him for the gifts He shares with me.

What am I grateful for? What are the gifts I appreciate?

Not in any particular order, I thank my Creator for life itself, good health, my precious family, and for the friends whom I also love and share this life with. I am also grateful for my lifestyle (being able to raise my children as a full time homemaker along with the extra luxury of homeschooling my kids) and the home and neighborhood I live in. I've always appreciated the hills, trees and farmland view we have from our front yard....as well as the picturesque backyard we have which is framed with trees and a small pond. I'm grateful for my Catholic Faith, and the church I attend. Not only is it a haven for my restless soul, it feeds and strengthens my spiritual resolve. I truly appreciate and admire the gorgeous park I routinely run at. The arching trees and graveled path that laces the Missouri River is truly an inspiration. It's a place where my nerves are soothed. In spite of the challenges I have faced in the past with my middle child I possess an unbeatable hope that keeps me going through the rough times. I am so grateful for that gift. It has serviced me well. Along with that hope are dreams that continually excite and entice me to "reach for the stars," even at an age when most think they are too old to create new dreams. In my opinion, it's our dreams that keep us alive. Once again, I am grateful.

Last, but not least, I am even thankful for the challenges that I have faced and continue to face. As hard as these challenges are, I appreciate the strength that is born from them. Through these challenges I continually discover new facets of who I am and who I need to become.

I truly believe that our happiness is linked closely to how much we appreciate life and the gifts that life continually offers us every day.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Why I Treasure Fall (photo essay)

Thu, 19 Nov 2009 19:11:25 -0500

Although Summer is the carefree and fun season, I love Fall's beauty and comfortable temperatures. It's hard to beat the the midwest when it comes to Fall. Below are some pictures I took....trying to capture the mystery and beauty of it all.....

This picture was taken near Little Rock, Arkansas where I hiked and rapelled with my oldest son.

The rest are taken in Missouri...mainly in my own yard. (There is a pond in our backyard.)

Even the fallen leaves on our deck are gorgeous!

Where Is TheObsoleteMan? I'm Concerned.

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 22:11:33 -0500

Has anyone heard from TheObsoleteMan? To tell you the truth, I am concerned about him. He hasn't written anything for awhile and I've sent him a couple of pm's and he hasn't returned them. That is not like him. If anyone knows anything about him....please let me know. I'm worried and wondering.

Should I put a picture of him on a milk carton?!

I Hate Menopause!

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 11:11:32 -0500

I don't like the stage I'm going through right now. As a matter of fact, I hate it. I'm sure it has a lot to do with being 50 and trying to juggle all that's going on in my life.

On one hand, there is no one thing that's really awful or that insurmountable. I've got my health, my family is healthy and I live comfortably. I almost feel bad about even complaining about anything especially when there are so many others in this world who are suffering. There are so many gifts in my life to be grateful for....and I truly appreciate them all. Gifts such as excellent health, an enjoyable and comfortable life style, super friends, good family, a home and neighborhood that I truly enjoy, more than enough activities and interests to keep me busy, dreams for my future, a Catholic faith that feeds me spiritually and books to read for the rest of my life!

So what's the problem? To be frank, I think it's the oncoming of menopause....the transition in my life that I've dreaded ever since I was old enough to learn about it. It's something physical that I can point fingers at simply because I'm experiencing its realities.

I hate the uninvited hot flashes that hit me without warning. By the time I notice the heat building within my body, it's too late to try to counteract the hot demon. It doesn't matter what I'm doing during the day. I can be paying bills, running at the park, driving in the car, cooking, teaching my kids etc. and all of a sudden my body heats up to feverish temperatures while my face turns blushing pink. This heat wave that lasts only a minute or so cannot be controlled or soothed....unless I open up the sliding doors and welcome in the crispy cool Fall temperatures. Apparently, hot flashes don't need sleep because they pester me at night also. One minute I'm cozily covered by my blankets enjoying their warmth....the next minute, I'm throwing them off because I'm so hot. After I'm cooled down, I go seeking their warmth once again. This happens at least two or three times throughout each night. Coupled with waking up because of the slightest sounds, it seems like I'm always tired.

Another side effect of menopause is struggling with weight loss. I'd love to lose 20 pounds and even though I eat way less than I did a decade ago.....AND continue running two miles three times a week....it seems like I'm getting heavier. What's with that?! I'm also surrounded with two beautiful model-like daughters who are thin. They look soooo wonderful in their fashionable outfits that it inspires me to want to lose weight. I wouldn't want to be as slim as them.....but thinner than I am would be fabulous!

My emotional state is almost back to where it was when I was a teenager....or when a pregnant woman. Lately, I've cried twice....for no real reason.....and I'm not one to cry....unless I'm watching a sad or sentimental movie. I hate the influx of emotions. At least when I was a teenager, I had college, career, marriage and children to look forward to. When I was pregnant fighting a roller coaster of emotions, I was young and had a brand new baby to look forward to. At fifty I've "been there done that," and have less to look forward to. As a matter of fact, when I look into the future, I see more aging taking over my body.....an empty house because the children have grown.....dying parents and other loved ones.....and ultimately, death. To say the least, I'm not excited. Of course I've some plans, ideas and even dreams for my future and that helps to keep me going when I'm feeling down.....but I so badly miss the stage of my life when I was bringing new life into the world. I miss having a baby on my hip, cradling them and seeing their faces light up when entering a room. I miss their sweetness and innocence. I miss being needed and wanted by them. Oh sure, my older kids still need me at times for a lift or for some help here and there....but mostly, I feel unappreciated.

I'm also having a harder time dealing with my 73 year old parents. Not sure if it's the invasion of menopause that's causing my frustrations with them or simply my age. I never had real criticisms of them until I moved out and started raising my own family....and even then, anything negative I felt toward them was truly not that big of a deal. I also realize that my own grown kids are going to have their own criticisms toward me as they mature and live their lives the way they think is best. But lately, I am more easily annoyed by their actions and lack of actions. I won't go listing them here because it's not important, but I wrestle with the question, " Is my annoyance because of how I'm changing (and I blame menopause) or because of how they have changed?"

If this is what menopause is about....then I already hate it. Any suggestions?

Let's Kill The Liberals!

Fri, 6 Nov 2009 09:11:31 -0500

"If you were in a room with Hitler, Mussolini, and a Liberal and had a gun with two bullets, what do you do?.......Shoot the Liberal twice. Hahaha"

I'm beginning to realize that I need to delete the Facebook friends who make stupid Republican comments or jokes, in this example. The above was a comment a Facebook friend left on the Facebook "home" feed. What makes the deleting a little more complicated is that the above Facebook friend is my nephew who lives in Texas. When I see comments like this, especially coming from a family member, I feel compelled and almost obliged to respond. I responded with: "Do you have any liberals in mind? (More than half of your family are Democrats!) Also, are you saying that Hitler and Mussolini are better than Democrats/Liberals? Come on Matt, think about what you're saying."

After my nephew and brother verbally "ganged" up on me for my comment.....you can probably figure out the ensuing comments: Liberals can't take a joke and I'm looking silly for the comment I made etc. I simply told him that I don't think it's ever funny to joke about killing....especially in light of past school killings and other public murders in our country.

I would like to go back and add the recent killing spree at Ft. Hood in Texas as another example. As tempted as I am to do that, I've decided to restrain myself and just let the discussion end. Hopefully, my points will not look as "silly" now with the recent Texas tragedy.

When are the far right Republicans going to wake up?!