Just Cathy's Open Salon Blog

Short and Bitter Sweet Goodbye

Mon, 23 Nov 2009 18:11:27 -0500

No, I am not flouncing from our OS community and am resolved in allowing myself to feel *safe* here from an even bigger flounce.

This last weekend, after returning from vacationing in Mexico, my husband and I spent hours sharing feelings and beliefs about the condition of our government and our country. This was not a feel good conversation.

We both spent hours on line reading the definitions, history, objectives and goals of the party system, each party within this out-dated system and searched our minds and hearts about leaving the party system all together.

It turns out that we do not need to be affiliated with any party or definition of any group in order to vote, both in the general election or the state primaries. A bit surprised over the latter, we looked at one another and knew, in that moment, we would be denouncing our registered party affiliation, long in coming and join the ranks of the undecided, unlabeled, undefined, unaffiliated, dissatisfied citizens.

It was liberating, not to be confused with liberal. It is quasi-conservative in nature as we do not plan to start a riot, rally, demonstration or political chat room over this decision. This is it. Right here. Right now.

Simple as pie, we went to the post office and picked up our voter registration change cards. No fuss, no muss. Easy peasy. Quick and done.

And after listening to a major news station defining "Independents" as the new mass of voters who are essentially the "elephant in the room," not to be confused with "the right," having a profound new presence in determining future elections. It could be another changing of the tides.

Whatever...After all their political blathering and fumbling about with this notion of unaffiliated voters or Independents, we were certain not to check that box on the card, either. You can check nothing and still vote!

Happy days! No more water cooler snide remarks about our former party affiliation, no more dinner party conversation and avoidance of politico-party talk, false comraderie and political back slapping "BS." We're done! Caput! Adios! We're nobodies and it feels sooooo gooood!

Can't wait to start deleting all the party nonsense and sending it to spam hell, where it belongs. Can't wait to unsubscribe from each and every party self involved, delusional site, trying to sell me on the latest book about how to save the world, one war at a time. Thanks, but no thanks!

Don't get me wrong, please. We are still Americans fighting for the survival of our country and our own, as US citizens. I can no longer say, "I'm proud to be an American," like I once was, but I am determined to find my way back to being as proud as I once felt, "many moons ago" (an old Native American expression), however, without any party slogans to guide me. It's a whole new ball game now.

I cannot in good conscience, fathom how I would explain to my grown children or grand children, how to be a part of a party system which has failed us miserably. It will not come from me. It will be their choice and I am happy to bow out of this one.

Knowing or believing and hoping for what is right, will need to come from a different place now and without the railing of disjointed party feuding and dissidence. It needs to come from some place deeper within and with plenty of research and understanding of what is most likely to heal this ailing country and which groups of people or specific candidates are most worthy and capable of effecting real and lasting change for the good of all.

Case by case, year by year. One election at a time. One issue at a time, each on it's own merit. I will remain open and unfettered by either or all parties who will continue to spew their propaganda and divisive ideologies. A tall order, yes. A new beginning, most importantly for us. A departure from bitterness, divisiveness and name calling. We are supposed to be grownups and know better. Maybe now, we can. A new day, a new vow. Man and wife, walking a new walk, together.

A bit melancholy? You could say so. At least for me, it will make room for more freedom of thought and a deeper appreciation for looking at the whole, without party prejudice.

It is hard enough just knowing that we live in a country with a very fractured government which struggles to redefine what it is continually, along with a culture of greed and over indulgence on every level of our existence.

It was quite a talk we had. Not your usual weather outlook or bill paying discussion. A realization of the change that is needed and that it has to start with us. It's never too late and it feels good.

I'm in the LOW RISK Group for H1N1...Are YOU?

Sat, 7 Nov 2009 02:11:10 -0500

Yesterday, my two and a half year old grandson was diagnosed with H1N1.

I have been taking care of him for the better part of a week. I can barely stand to see how lethargic and feverish he has been. His clear blue eyes have taken on a swollen, reddish appearance; his arms and legs so limp and without the usual hyper active antics of a healthy toddler. He is sick. He even says to me, "Doctor. Doctor." The diagnosis stung. Disbelief.

Naturally, since I am his primary care giver, next to his mom and dad, I had some questions. How in the world did he get this? Day Care, when I am not taking care of him, would be a natural guess? Oh my God! What do we do for him? How bad is this? (all the confusing news media reports on this serious flu strain are running through my mind...the severity; the depth of this virus, the affect on my precious grandson...and his baby sister?!? What do we do now?

One week before his diagnosis with H1N1

And, secondary to the shock of this diagnosis, is the fact that a week from yesterday, my husband and I are leaving for vacation, out of the country. I *should* have some curiosity. Will I get this? How likely am I to get this? Am I high risk? Low risk? Or somewhere in between? What is the appropriate course of action? Do I want to risk coming down with H1N1 when I am in a third world country? Thinking...not.

I tell myself, it's not a problem, whatever it is... it IS! I can handle the truth! Or can I? Would like to think I could.

My immediate concern is for my grandson and his younger sibling, my 7 month old grand daughter, who is in the considerably higher risk category.

I cannot bear the thought that this freaking flu has gotten to my babies!

Doctor confirms he has the H1N1 flu. Doctor says he is over the worst. He is 5-6 days into it. He also has double ear infections. So, he can take antibiotics for the secondary ear infections but it will have no affect on the dreaded flu. It will have to run it's course. Those are not the most reassuring words!

The real concern is for my grand daughter, 7 months and with little immune systems in place, who will likely come down with the "swine" flu in a day or two. My heart pounds heavily, like nothing I have felt before. She is so little and her immune system cannot fight this. Now what?!

My baby grand daughter has no idea what is coming. Nor do we.

I am just the grandmother. I get that. I am a tough cookie. A rough, tough cream puff! Heck yeah! I will look this demon in the eye! I will lick the germs off the toys and bounce back stonger, meaner than ever! Never test the strength of a die hard gramma! Never! You get that?

So, doctor says, "Gramma is in a low risk group for H1N1." I can dig that. What can I do? What should I do?

Had it not been for the 2 respiratory infections I had last season and the uber strong antibiotics I took for those two suckers...I would have no issue with being in the low group. Fine. I have never had a flu shot in my life. True. Have never intended on getting flu shots...till now. Yet, I am still not sure.

What is the proper medical protocol? I had to ask. Boy, were the answers varied! It is clear, that there is no pat answer to all the questions that arise when someone close to you is diagnosed with H1N1.

I got very passionate resp0nses from my daughter and mother of my diagnosed grandson. She is very medically oriented, a vet tech and her best friend, a Pediatrician, is her children's doc.

Then, there is my sister, Sheila, who is a Labor and Delivery Tech for a major hospital, who is debriefed daily on the H1N1 protocol, who has very strong opinions about the optimal course of action.

Then there is the national news. The local news. The Internet Med sites. The experience and opinions of your family and friends. Who would you put your money on?

For my money, it's my daughter and mother of my grandbabies. She wins. But she, too, is conflicted. There is no 100% right course of action for this. It differs by age group, length of exposure, previous medical history and the medical opinion of your own family doctor. It is relatively new and there is differing protocol, depending on your circumstances, where you live, who you consult with and how you decide what is best for your situation. There is no right or wrong decision here. There is only the best available information that is known today. It may change tomorrow. It may change next week...next month...and so on.

It boils down to personal choice; whether or not to take the known possible medications to lessen the degree of the virus or shorten it's longevity and minimize, if lucky, it's affects. It is very subjective. It is fickle at best.

I could care less about my vacation next week and am so much more concerned about the choices left to us in determining the proper course of action for something that has very little history or a success or failure rate by which to decide what is best.

It's the flu, pure and simple. Or is it? Depends on how your body assimilates the virus and then, more importantly, how your body absorbs the medication. And that is only IF you are in the *group* that is given the medication which 'may or may not' have any affect on your healing at all.

You ask yourself, where did this come from? Apparently in our case, a family from Tennessee was visiting relatives of a child who goes to the same day care as my grandson and were all (5) diagnosesdwith H1N1.

You can have faith in whatever happens or you can see this as a medical crap shoot.

Most of us reading this are in a low risk group. The precious babies in these photos are in a high risk group.

I am writing this for them.

I have purposely left out medical details and names of possible medications for the "Swine Flu." Or, H1N1, to be politically correct. This is very controversial at best.

Do your research. Don't be surprised, as I was, to find that there are very differing answers to all your questions. They vary from doctor to doctor. Doctor to Pharmacist ,who gives you "informed instructions" on how to take your medication or that of your infant child or grand children.

And did I mention that there is a shortage of medication for H1N1? Surely most of us have heard this in the news or on the Net. It, too, varies by state, county and pharmacy. Be proactive, Make some calls. You need to know where it is available when the time of need comes calling.

I am far less concerned about myself and critically concerned about my grand babies and all the babies that are exposed to this uncontrolled virus that seems to be spreading faster than the tabloids.

The medicine needed for babies and toddlers is far less available than that for adults. It must be compounded at pharmacies that have the vaccine readily available. It took 2 days to get this for my grand daughter, who has not presented symptoms yet, but is expected to come down with this flu any time now. That may not seem so bad or so long, but the timing is critical in catching this virus in the first 12-24 hours. Otherwise, the meds have little or not affect, according to their Pediatrician, my GP and a major hospital currently treating several cases of H1N1.

Be proactive where your little ones are concerned. Do not hesitiate to take action if there is any hint of this virus in your family or if symptoms of the flu show up in you or your children. Especially fever, is not to be overlooked with this virus, as it comes on rather suddenly. Their health and ours is in our hands and our ability to act quickly.

For our immediate family, it is one day at a time right now. We have all been exposed and we are all being treated differently, when symptoms appear. I am praying for the babies to get through this quickly and without any long term negative side affects. Only time will tell. I have faith that all will be OK and this, too, shall pass.

Be well, take good care and be prepared for a long, hard winter.

The Deception of The Big Box Concept

Tue, 3 Nov 2009 23:11:06 -0500

It's the retail super-sizing phenomenon, yes it is! Been around for over 2 decades and keeps 'em coming back for more, more and double or triple down for storing away every imaginable electronic gismo, gadget, pantry goods, essentials and non-essentials for a rainy day.

Wholesale Club parking lot complete with electric car charging station.

'Ginormous' club packs originally designed for mid-size business models, commercial vs. private consumer use, has become the norm for the every day homeowner or volume discount shopper. Buy more now. It may not be there next week. Other than club staples, there is a revolving selection of new "must have" products every week. Flat screen TV's dominate the front end of the store, impossible to avoid as you enter this oversized retail space, chock full of products for every taste, desire and wallet size.

From extra large two packs of popular brands of bread to car and truck sales as competitive as any car lot barker and the best, fastest, new tire business, done in an hour on a Saturday morning. All brands of tires for nearly every make and model of car or truck and you are back in business and ready to spend your hour inside, shopping for every necessity and non-necessity imaginable.

We have all been there, be it Costco, BJ's or Sam's Club. We are all members at some level; business or personal, regular or executive membership, as easy as pie. We are in the "Club!" We are exclusive members of an elite shopping mecca, given the buying power of a large consumer business with bonus packs, higher counts, volume purchases that are guaranteed to save us money in the long run. Beware the short run and the budget busting shopping experience that is more than likely to break the bank, lead us into overspending, while feeding us in the food aisles, tempting us to buy several month's worth of pesto sauce, frozen bagels, gallons of spinach dip and crates of fruits and veggies.

The numerous tables of seasonal clothing for all ages in nationally recognized brands of varying quality, mostly pretty decent. I now wear clothes from the clubs. Why not?

We find ourselves inside the guts of these mega-size retail spaces, dizzy with merchandise to wade through in our blind effort to find the best buys that will be gone in a week, a day, or a minute! Gotta buy it now or forever hold your peace. Don't let a bargain slip through your sweaty little hands, even if you don't need it and only think you do...until you get home and realize you went so far over budget that your gas and electric may be turned off!

What is it that so seduces us into over buying, believing we really need the 'humongus' packs of cereal, batteries, bulk nuts, vitamins and super size shampoos for life? Is it the allure of the club mentality? Are we mystified by the ability to buy bigger, better, cheaper, all the while buying more than we need? Does this exclusive membership trick us into believing that we are empowered with an ability over others and that we will have more, more and enviably, the most? Or are we in the grip of wasteful habits and retail addiction that feeds us through a belief system that needs, wants and desires to be surrounded with excess? Plenty of rainy day stash and bulk packs of TP, tissue, soda, 'gargantuin' sized bottles of gin, vodka, beer, food storage container sets of 50?! What do we need with all those sizes? You guessed it! To store all the bigger volume sized food products we are buying that will more than likely go bad before we can possibly eat it all. And now, you will also need a second refrigerator to accomodate all the perishable purchases!

The club food concession stand where the club size meals are a real steal, whether you are hungry or not!

But, hey! While you're there, if you haven't had enough of all the free food samplings along your retail journey down the many food isles, there's always the food concession stand before you exit the warehouse. Meals and deals that cannot be beat! Club size brauts or dogs, chips and a large soda for a buck fifty?! Are you out of your mind? Gotta eat that! Line 'em up for that price!

Now if you are a prudent buyer, entering at your own financial risk, bringing a "list" and only plan to purchase what is on that "list," then you are a better man or woman than I am. Hubster and I go with the intent of buying only what we need for the month and mainly in non-perishable products, consisting of all the necessary paper products, diapers and wipes for the grand kiddies, some nice wine for gramma and boppa, those incredible facial wipes that were recently discovered, avoiding the bakery section in the back of the club where they also lure you with the rotisserie chicken! The hook! There it is! Now you are in the meat section! You have never seen meat this big, this red and juicy and now you are planning a neighborhood BBQ that had never entered your mind before. Who can we invite so we can buy this club pack of T-bones, the 24" pie, the 50 pack of dinner rolls and the commercial restaurant size box of artichokes and corn on the cob! Gotta have that! So maybe no barbeque for the hood; we can simply eat all this over the next week or two, if the food doesn't rot first? Sure, we can do that! It's a volume buy, for Pete's sake! Mouths are watering and there's an elder woman wearing a nice little hat and apron handing out bite sizes pieces of fresh cheese cake. Gotta have that! So what if it's the size of a spinning wheel! We can freeze half!

I don't know about you, but I can't seem to get out of a warehouse club for under $250 - $300, no matter how I plan to limit spending, tighten the belt (I usually don't wear one) or mentally limit my list of necessitites to a mere $100 bucks! That just never happens! I become a retail slut in about 5 minutes! See those great pillows? Ah, look at the toddler jammies and oh, hun, we need a new patio umbrella. And the handsome sales rep from the local winery has an end cap of superb wine that will run out in about an hour. Gotta have some of that before the lot is gone! It was the best year for Petite Sirah, ya know. And poor hubby slinks off down the electronics isle bringing back a bulk pack of blue tooth head sets and batteries...it's a law now...gotta have that! Don't even think about looking at the jewelry and the diamonds! Not going to happen. And never, ever go down the bulk candy isle! Books and CD's, ok.

And so it goes...See how it adds up?!

Caveat emptor!!!

I Like Halloween! (haiku...ghoulishious)

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 22:10:15 -0400

I like Halloween

All the ghouls and the goblins!

I am not a'scared!

I like dressing up

and being a hobo beatnik!

What is that, you say!

It was long ago.

I was twelve and just too old.

I felt out of place.

But now I'm gramma

and I get to start again!

Bringing out the orange...

The pumkins galore,

the kiddie costumes delight;

grandkids at the door!

G'Dog is a Knight.

His armour a shiny glow;

his smile so bright!

While little Sydney,

barely old enough to know,

wears pumpkin proudly...

upon her tiny onesie!

Don't come to my door

If you're driving and voting!

Grabbing all you can!

That's just obnoxious!

And you know who you all are!

Looking like you care.

Don't let me find you

teepeeing my house and trees!

A spell I will cast!

And don't waste the eggs!

A twisted frog you will be.

A cackle is heard.

Have a Happy and Safe Halloweenie!!!

Rockin' Hot Sister MaryTKelly's B-Day Update w/PICS

Thu, 22 Oct 2009 10:10:40 -0400

Today, October 22nd, is Mary's birthday and we are going to celebrate in classic sister style.

Left to right: Just me, our sassy sister, Sheila, our silly friend, Gwen and my rockin' hot sister, MaryTKelly! This photo was taken last January at my b-day party and will have to suffice. I will have follow-up photos to add after the birthday bash!

OUR BIRTHEDAY GIRL AT YANKEE PIER IN LARKSPUR FOR FRESH SEAFOOD. SKIPPED THE ITALIAN RESTAURANT. WE SHARED A WEDGE SALAD, A FRESH BEET SALAD AND EACH HAD ANOTHER FOOD SELECTION. ALL YUMMY.

So, our day will start out something like this:

Mary will wake up early thinking about the last minute goodies to throw into her carry-on luggage, remembering baggies for security screening of her fluids. Don't forget the Ambien or the Xanax! Fear of flying a thing of the distant past. Hopefully. So go ahead and buy that jumbo box of face masks at the airport. You never know. I did mention to bring hand sanitizer and those disinfectant wipes! You can never be too careful these days! PS - If you've been looking for those cool yellow reading glasses...? Yep, they're here. You left them last time. Aging causes forgetfullness, disorientation and mindless mishaps. But don't worry.

She'll throw in a good book she's been trying to read, however, it won't be read while she's under my watch. Oh no! We've got stuff to do, see, hear, eat, lounge around on the living room sofa, laugh till we cry, and keep up with OS, for sure. I will likely be running to the store for last minute treats, fresh flowers for the "Marester" (she does 'love her' some fresh flowers!) And some wine for the "bad sisters!" Oh yeah, we be b-a-d!

Yep, the "Bad Sisters"

Sheila, youngest sister and I, some years ago. An "olde" photo, 'cause reference to anything old, as long as it is not about Mary, makes her happy. I will never put the word "old" and Mary in the same sentence. Not a chance!

So, off to the airport we go, Sheila and I, to pick up our birthday girl and head north and over the Golden Gate Bridge. Entering Marin County through a scenic tunnel, outlined in rainbow colors ("The Rainbow Tunnel," my kids named it years ago) will be the entrance to Mary's old stomping grounds (oops)! It's harder than you think to form a sentence without using the words "old" and Mary in it. Dang!

In another short 10 minutes we will arrive in historic Larkspur, where Mary spent many of her growing up years, high school days and general messing around. This is Mary's beloved old home town and one which has cast a spell over her, bringing her reoccuring fits of nostalgia, wistful memories and a longing for the old days. Well, maybe not so much. But she does love this town and insists we always go back to her's and Mom and Dad's favorite Italian restaurant, which we will likely do for her birthday lunch. Maybe even sit outside. She would like that. Or we'll go somewhere else. Mary's call.

Happy memories of St. Patrick's School and Church (will leave it at that!)

Downtown Larkspur with that "old" town charm

The "old" Lark Theater, still there after all these years

So, yeah, this is where we'll be hanging tomorrow for Mary's birthday. A beautiful day is promised by the weather god's for this special day. A perfect autumn day with all the colors of fall that Mary is hoping to see. And she will. We'll walk through town, all 3 blocks of it, reminiscent of old days gone forever. A town full of rich history, both for it's proximity to San Francisco and for it's family adventures during Mary's developing years, now like a distant star in the universe. (Cue music) Right about now, Mary is thinking, "blah, blah, blah...!"

After our filling lunch (Gnocci) and some walking around town, we will head back up the hill to my place and just hang out together, relax, be cozy, talk smack about our husbands and kids, absolutely avoid any talk of politics or "Balloon Boy" or "Health Scare"...and enjoy our sister time which is becoming fewer and farther inbetween...then later decide whether to eat dinner in or go out...or simply go wherever the wind blows us...

AFTER LUNCH HANGING IN MY LIVING ROOM, HAVING COFFEES AND BIRTHDAY CUPCAKES.

PISTACIO CUPCAKES FOR MARY (HER FIRST GREEN CUPCAKES EVER!)

YEP! MARY ON LAPTOP LOOKING AT OS COMMENTS!

We are 3 of 5 sisters, the other two who live in Colorado and see Mary more regularly, won't be here for this birthday celebration. Just Mary along with Just Cathy and Simply Sheila (the "bad sisters" who will be popping open the wine cork to toast Mary before Ellen comes on)! And perhaps an "Olde Virgin Bloody Mary" for the wiser, sober, younger sister (younger than me, not Sheila), though that drink sounds *just wrong* somehow?! May go with the "old" standby, Arnie Palmer instead! Less graphic than the aforementioned bloody drink. Tea and lemon, "tea and jam...jam and tea..." Better visual. (Fade in Julie Andrews in The Sound of Music...one of Mary's old favorites!)

EVENING IN LARKSPUR, CHATTING, MAC-ING, EATING. LOTS OF CHARDONNAY FOR THE "BAD SISTERS" AND A POMEGRANITE ICE TEA LEMONADE FOR THE SENSIBLE SISTER.

Then, best of all, a sister's sleep-over where the real cuddling and giggling begins. The 3 of us undoubtedly will all climb into my big (not brass) four poster bed, get under the big cozy down comforter, get all comfy and watch some Thursday night "T-Vers." Flash Forward a must. Non-negotiable. Followed by Grey's Anatomy. Also non-negotiable for Sheila, who works in a big hospital and lives for the drama of real life, made for TV medical love triangles.

Check out Mary now, on her Mac-top with those sexy granny reading glasses, the ones she left here last month, wearing her cute jammies, scanning the OS (with childlike delight) for comments to this birthday post. You know she will! And mark my words, there will be follow-up photos!

SNAPPED THIS PHOTO QUICKLY BEFORE SHE SAID, "NO PHOTOS WITH MY READING GLASSES!" BUT, IT FITS! AND SHE IS ADORABLE IN HER READERS, THOUGH THESE ARE DIFFERENT THAN THE ONES SHE LEFT LAST MONTH.

This is always the best time of all. Just us. Sisters and friends, like we were still 8 years old. All snuggled in one big bed. Just hangin'. Just being silly girls. Girlie girls. Lucky duckies! It's always the same for us. Predictable, anticipated; cherished times. Some things never change...old habits die hard... and all that "malarkey! "

Somewhere, in lies some Irish wisdom passed on by our dearly departed Mom, who taught us the importance of togetherness, being genuinely content at home, family time, sisterly love and the "petting," or loving touch that was her signature. All that said, these are Mary's gifts to all she loves and comforts, in her home and surroundings, brightened by her smile...her fiery spirit... her "Maryessence!"

SO, OK, THERE AREN'T TOO MANY PHOTOS CAUSE WE WERE LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY MOST OF THE EVENING AND JUST LET THE GOOD TIMES ROLL!

FUNNIEST MOMENT WAS WHEN THE PIZZA DELIVERY GUY CAME TO THE DOOR. MY DOG WAS BARKING MADLY, PIZZA GUY WANTED NO PART OF MY DOG SO I CLOSED THE DOOR WHILE MARY HELD HIM BACK, I TRIED TO MAKE EXACT CHANGE TO PAY HIM, DROPPED THE MONEY AND MY DRAWSTRING LOUNGING PJ'S SLIPPED BELOW SAID BUTT CRACK LINE OF DEMARCATION, CAUSING 3 VERY SILLY SISTERS TO DOUBLE OVER LAUGHING TO THE POINT OF TEARS, PIZZA GUY LOOKING LIKE HE MAY EITHER ENTER THE HOUSE AND JOIN US OR RUN IN FEAR OF BEING EXPOSED TO SOME CONTAGIOUS, MOUTH FOAMING DISEASE. ALL HE SAID WAS, "YOU CAN WRITE A CHECK?" TO WHICH, WE ROLLED OUT ANOTHER ROUND OF HYSTERIA, HOLDING OUR STOMACHS, DOUBLED OVER IN UNSTOPPABLE LAUGHTER.

THE PIZZA TASTED SO GOOD. MAYBE THE BEST PIZZA WE'VE EVER EATEN. MORE WINE, MORE GIGGLES, MORE CONVERSATION AND GOOD TIMES. BIGGEST REGRET WAS NOT GETTING A GROUP SHOT WITH PIZZA GUY!

"Melted Butter"

~~~

Just a silly little birthday post for my baby sister, wh0 does, without a doubt, look younger with each passing year.

(more points!)

Coming to get'cha soon, Mare!

xoxoxoxo

(note: Expecting Mary to read this post before she takes off from Denver for San Fran, (OF COURSE SHE DID!) so a little something to kick off her birthday fun, full of sunshine, surprises and sisterly love).