Epic Tantrum

Sat, 31 Jan 2009 21:01:01 -0500

I am blessed to be the mother of Her Maj, my five year old girl. Amazing, intelligent, well-liked at school, and perplexing.

Thursday I picked her up early from school for her swimming lesson with her buddy, The Alligator. We are in the locker room getting dressed and the Alligator is ready before her. Wait a minute, let me pull your hair into a ponytail. A fit ensues. And escalates. To the point where the much prized swimming lesson is withdrawn. Which just enrages her even more. Screaming, crying, physically resisting being dressed because of course I was not going to take her out in 40 degree weather in only her swimsuit. I spanked her (for the 5th time in her life) - and have learned now that while it may work for other kids, it just magnifies her rage.

Yes, I was the mother that the other women going in and out of the locker room pitied. I was the woman who could not manage to control her child. Finally, she is dressed and we can leave. In the car, I ask her what happened - turns out she had this idea in her head to be in the pool before the Alligator. Alligator is a boy and does not have waist length hair, of course he is going to be ready first.

When we get home we retreat to neutral corners. Her Maj is on the couch with juice and WonderPets, I'm in the bedroom with wine and my phone. I call her teacher because I 'm wondering if this is happening in school and if some other issues are going well and because when I asked her to call me last week, she never did.

She's doing fine, just not doing her schoolwork. To the point where she will not graduate from kindergarten. And if her teacher tries to get her to do her work, she cries. Now Her Maj is in a massively expensive montessori school because she missed the kindergarten cutoff by one day and another year of daycare was not appropriate. Miss H. is definitely not Simon LeGree - she is very kind. Furthermore, she was reading by 4, and according to her teacher could do the work, she just won't. Since she will have to repeat kindergarten anyway, graduating is not a big deal - but the tears and tantrums are. It's not like we are afraid to discipline her and she has a predictable routine - dinner, bath, storytime every night, etc. What gives?

My Favorite Bride

Fri, 16 Jan 2009 17:01:30 -0500

In response to the call for compliments, I'll share this story (about a compliment):

I used to own a small bridal shop, with a very talented seamstress, and was priviledged to dress some of the most beautiful young ladies in Houston before a lamentable lack of profits forced me to close it's doors.

One day a young lady called for a fitting and needed not a dress but a miracle. She was quite wide and B. (the very talented seamstress) literally had to turn her long sleeve gown (bought elsewhere) into a short sleeve gown in order to enlarge the bodice of her gown.

This sweet bride was never going to stop traffic, but when she came for her second fitting she said, "I am so pleased with your seamstress's work. She has made this dress Beautiful Like Me."

That lovely girl taught me the truth about loving yourself in 10 seconds.

My daughter will never hear me complain about my weight (bring on the Fat Ass Chocolate Cake), my crow's feet, or my incredibly scaly feet (ok, maybe the feet), because if she continuously sees me hate myself, how will she learn to love herself?

Bella99's Open Salon Blog

Epic Tantrum

My Favorite Bride