FabulouslyFlirty's Open Salon Blog

To The Man I Love On Father’s Day

Sat, 20 Jun 2009 20:06:48 -0400

I remember well, the first time I met you. You were so incredibly attractive to me. Bright, sexy, funny – god, I loved your sense of humor. I still do. An instant connection. We both felt it, I know. Beyond that sexual lightening that was striking, your soul cried out to mine.

And mine answered.

But. One thing about you stood above the rest.

For me.

To me.

And still does.

And always will.

You are an incredible dad. Incredible. And exceptional. That attracted me as much as any other quality you possess. Whenever I’m in the presence of the two of you, the bond you share is a tangible thing. A joy to see.

I know the depth of the pain and sorrow you feel because you aren’t together all the time. The pain and sorrow you try so hard to hide. You can’t. Not from me.

I see.

I know.

I understand your struggle.

I wipe away the tears, sometimes. When you let me. Which you do, more often now. Let me. Let me ease the pain. Share the burden, if only for a little while.

Know this.

Believe it.

On this Father’s Day.

Even though you aren’t together, you are. Always. She carries you in her heart. She won’t ever stop. Not ever. You are her father. The first love of her life. You always will be. She’s thinking of you, even now. Loving you.

And always will.

Always.

Happy Father’s Day, babe. To the very best father I’ve ever had the privilege of knowing.

I love you.

Naked Sunbathing

Thu, 18 Jun 2009 11:06:08 -0400

The sun is out today. Finally. After what seems like weeks of straight rain. I think I shall indulge in a favorite of mine – naked sunbathing. I can’t be the only person to enjoy this particular pastime. Feeling the warmth of the sun kissing each and every inch of my naked splendor. Lazily lounging; limbs shifting. Ever reaching toward the sunlight. The slight and occasional tease of a breeze.

There’s something sensual about it. Erotic. And. I like it. Love it, in fact. I revel in sensuality. I didn’t always have the freedom to do that. Not so much because of me as my circumstances. But life changes and so do our circumstances and I now have the freedom to express that aspect of myself that is so very inherent in me. Am encouraged to do so, in fact.

Now. What to do about the new neighbor? Who is elderly. Possibly a little perverted, even. I must admit a for part of me, exhibitionist that I am, giving the old guy a secret thrill has a certain appeal. Then again, I might just go around to the other side of the house.

I wouldn’t want to have to do naked CPR.

A Far, Far Better Place

Thu, 11 Jun 2009 15:06:09 -0400

Today is the 26^th anniversary of my wedding. In fact, my marriage ended two years ago. In reality, it was over before it started. I was young, and I just wanted to be loved. And, the girl I was then, was.

I’d like to believe so, anyway.

Through the years as the anniversaries came and went, I was evolving, growing, ever-changing into the woman I would become. I became bolder, more confident. In tune with myself and my sexuality. And, I liked it. I liked me.

Although I didn’t realize it at the time, he-who-I-had-been-married-to for more than half my life, did not. Could not. Would not. Ever. Worse still, he could not see me for who I was. Just the girl I had been. The girl he wanted still. When I finally was able to make clear to him exactly who I was, when he finally could see, I knew I was no longer what he wanted. And, that I never could be.

I can’t fault him. It’s not his fault that I had changed and he hadn’t. And, didn’t want to. It’s not his fault he didn’t want what he ended up with rather than what he thought he had. I can’t even fault him his god-awful actions in the end. Well, maybe I can fault him for that last one. I never, as long as I live, will understand how someone who could profess to love another as he did me could do and say the things he did during that time. Not ever.

But, I digress.

I’m in a far, far better place now. I’m with a man who is a man in every sense of the word. He gets me. Not only does he accept me for who and what I am, he revels in that. Encourages it. Isn’t threatened by it. Loves me. Me. Not the woman he thinks me to be. The woman that he knows I am. There is no pretense. Only open and honest communication between us.

And the most amazing sex. Ever. Adventurous, unashamed, fearless.

I look back on my past and wonder. But, the past is the past. I will never look at it as a failure. I heed the lessons well. I know that marriage, the proverbial house, picket fence, kids and a dog are not a guarantee of happiness. Or a guarantee of anything, really. I don’t take my life, or this man, my man, for granted. I am constantly amazed, even still, that I was so ridiculously lucky to have found him. To have this rare and illusive love.

What I always wanted but never knew until I found him.