FiredForNow's Open Salon Blog

The anti-petition: Hollywood speaks out against Polanski

Mon, 5 Oct 2009 21:10:25 -0400

Immediately following Roman Polanski’s arrest in Switzerland last week, a pro-Polanski petition instantly surfaced with dozens of signatures from the A-list of Hollywood. Ridiculous public declarations followed – Whoopi, you know who we’re talking about. Chris Rock seemed to be going it entirely solo when he spoke out against Polanski in an appearance on Jay Leno.

It seemed that the same people who use their celebrity to decry everything from child soldiers to victims of abuse wouldn’t dare speak out against one of their own, especially an auteur célèbre, for fear of being labeled ‘philistine’. (Debra – you know who we’re talking about.)

As a lover of movies, I’m heartened that another petition has surfaced encouraging industry types who don’t support amnesty for Polanski to speak up. So far, it's not sporting a lot of A-list support, despite over 400 signatures and counting. You’re more likely to see the names of hard-working unknowns than household names.

Still, there are some notable names and interesting comments from the likes of:

Bob Gale: co-writer of Back to the Future

David Zucker: co director and co-producer of Airplane and Naked Gun

Marc Guggenheim: veteran writer for TV’s The Practice, Law & Order, CSI: Miami, Brothers & Sisters, and most recently, FlashForward.

Edward Allen Bernero: executive producer of TV"s Criminal Minds

Dan Rather: Ex-anchor CBS News

Allen Covert: former SNL-writer and producer of films The Longest Yard and Anger Management

And as many now know, both Kevin Smith and Luc Besson refused to sign the free-Polanski petition. Kirstie Alley came out publicly on Twitter stating she does not support Polanski.

Now, the lack of star-power may be due partly to the petition’s online home. It’s housed at the website of one of Hollywood’s conservative naysayers, Andrew Breitbart, which could discourage some potential signatories. That would be unfortunate for I know I'm not alone in craving some perspective from the Hollywood community.

So please, any of you in the film fraternity with an opinion similar to Kevin Smith and Chris Rock -- and the courage to voice it -- reassure us.

Let us know you’re there too, so we can keep loving movies.

Losing my job was a gift to my kids

Sat, 25 Apr 2009 11:04:09 -0400

When I was laid off, my children knew right away. I’m not good at hiding things and I sometimes wear my heart on my sleeve too much for my own good. Plus, my kids are big. Like young-adult big.

So when I lost my job, I felt a deep sense of shame in telling them the news. I felt like I had failed them. I wasn’t the parent they could be proud of. No child boasts about a parent who spends their days at home in sweat pants, on the phone and net in between reruns of Law and Order or the latest episode of Ellen. I was an outcast, no longer wanted by the working world.

I knew it wasn’t rational. But often what our heads know and our hearts feel are miles apart.

As a parent, you feel your role is to have all the answers. We’re supposed to be strong, omnipotent, heal all hurts and provide all the opportunities. But in a society in which our value is so tied up in our work, when that world gives us our walking papers we feel our value to all, including our children, crashes to earth at the speed of light.

It’s hard to know what my children really thought when they learned I’d lost my job. They said the right, reassuring things.

My eldest said, “Shit, that sucks Mom. But you know you’ll be fine.”

My middle son said, “Hey Mom, you always land on your feet.”

I’ve been a single mom for a lot of my children’s growing up, so it’s not surprising that my two eldest, two boys in their early 20s, were quick to reassure. When moms parent on their own, boys can tend to assume a bit of a protective stance as they get older.

But I really didn’t know if this was all manufactured reassurance, them doing what they thought was right, while perhaps inside they were feeling fear, worry and, perhaps even worse, disappointment or even embarrassment. Things they wouldn’t dare share.

I had a clearer sense when my youngest, my daughter, learned the news. Now in her first year of university, she, too, wears her heart on her sleeve and often her reactions are not guided by a sense of how she should behave but simply what she feels and thinks in any given moment.

When she heard the news she simply blurted out, “What the f**k Mom? That’s terrible!”

Out of the mouths of babes and a 20-year-old.

Since then, they’ve watched as I’ve managed the phases of joblessness and uncertainty. From shell-shocked to panic to resignation to determination. And not always in a straight line.

I’ve always been honest with my children, even when life gets messy or complicated. I’ve tried to find the balance between sharing enough information without burdening or scaring them with too much.

I’ve always tried to respect my children as individuals, separate from me. I’ve tried to recognize that they are not simply extensions of my own existence on this planet, but they are complete beings in their own right.

And this week I couldn’t have gotten a better affirmation that I’ve done an okay job of it all.

It came in the form of an email from my daughter. She’d written me to share something. The email came at 12:44 a.m., still early by her nocturnal clock.

She had just finished speaking with a friend whose parents were planning to sell their house after her friend’s mother lost her job. And apparently she had told her friend about my blog, thinking her friend’s mom may like to read it.

Now, my children all know I’ve been writing this blog since last November, but it’s certainly not high on their reading lists. But this latest piece of news about a friend of hers prompted my daughter to go online and read some of her own mom’s musings.

She came across a post I wrote about three weeks ago titled “Beyond Compare: How I stopped comparing myself to others and began feeling happy right where I was”.

And in her email, she wrote:

“I read the whole thing and I just wanted to say I’m so happy for you. Obviously I know you've been going through a lot of changes recently, but I was not aware of the depth of the change in the way you've been thinking about these things, and I think it's really fucking awesome you've been able to let a lot of that weight go, that comes with the constant worry of self or others' approval. Who the fuck cares what they think?”

So that's all, I'm really happy you have a job that means a lot more to you now, regardless of if the pay is lower, because that is what is important! And I was just happy to read that. Go mum!”

As I read her words, my eyes instantly teared up. I felt a sense of love and acceptance. I felt that my child saw me for who I was, not simply as her parent.

And I saw something else. I saw that although I’ve been through a lot, her seeing me go through this wasn’t an awful thing, but actually, in some ways, it was a gift.

Without doubt, life’s going to give my children their own reversals of fortune and emotional upheavals. Who better to provide a great example of working through them to the other side?

And there's one more thing I saw: what makes a child proud of a parent may not always be what you think.

_________________________________________________

p.s. visit me at:

http://www.firedfornow.com/

Check out the forum there and add your story or get and give support.

Canadian Banks: envy of the world, eh?

Wed, 15 Apr 2009 10:04:14 -0400

If you’ve read some previous posts of mine, you may know I’m Canadian. Don’t hold it against me. As it turns out, we may finally have something to be envied by others: our banks.

For as long as I can remember, Canadians have had a rep for being conservative and cautious, especially compared to our American neighbours. Sometimes it’s well deserved, sometimes not.

After all, could a country that’s given you a range of people like Mike Myers, Jim Carry, the creators of Cirque du Soleil, William Shatner, Neil Young, Lorne (SNL) Michaels, Peter Jennings, Donald (and Keifer) Sutherland, and uh, Avril Lavigne and Pamela Anderson, be that cautious?

Apparently, yes. Especially when it comes to banking.

The Financial Times calls Canada’s banks “the envy of the world.” Newsweek’s Fareed Zakaria wrote that, thanks to its banks, “Canada has done more than survive this financial crisis. The country is positively thriving in it.” I think that's a bit of an overstatement since a lot of ordinary Canadians are hurting significantly with a recession we couldn't escape and an unemployment rate of 8 percent. Still, former Federal Reserve chairman Paul Volcker touted Canada’s banks as “the model for what a reformed American system should look like.”

Here are some tidbits to consider I’ve gleaned from recent articles in Maclean’s magazine and Canada’s Financial Post:

• The market value of Canada's major chartered banks increased about 85% since 1999, at a time when the aggregate market capitalization of the top 50 international banks declined by 26%.

• Canada’s banks raised $9 billion in capital since the fall through fresh share issues—an unheard-of feat in today’s markets.

• Of the 10 largest banks in North America, measured by assets, four are now Canadian.

• All five major Canadian chartered banks currently rank among the top 50 banks in the world

• Just seven banks in the world retain a AAA rating from Moody’s Investors Service. Two of those are Canadian.

• Last October, the World Economic Forum released its annual Global Competitiveness Report ranking Canada number one in the category labeled “soundness of banks”. (The U.S. was 40th, the U.K. 44th.)

• Canada's major banks are still paying dividends to shareholders.

So why are our banks coming through this relatively squeaky-clean? It's a combo:

• Our highly-regulated system, viewed by some as the most conservative in the world.

• Our banks – 5 major ones in total -- are federally-chartered and nationally based and aren’t subject to fluctuations in state laws that the 8,000 banks in the U.S. are.

• Compensation methods: For the most part, Canadian banks never tried to compete with the Goldman Sachs’ of the world and didn’t as a matter of course reward high-risk decisions (that could also be profitable) with high-stake bonuses, removing the incentive to take those high-risk moves

• Luck and timing dating back to some history and learning from mistakes in our banking history

Now all this doesn’t mean we’ve escaped the recession. As a country highly-dependent on a world economy and global trade, the excesses and lack of oversight in America and Europe have brought our economy tumbling as well. We, too, are experiencing the highest unemployment rate in 25 years. Our economy is based on exports of cars and lumber and commodities such as grain, metals, oil and gas, and demand for these things takes a dive in an unhealthy global economy.

I suppose the good news is that I can still keep money in my bank with confidence. And I still get to pay hefty fees for the privilege.

And I can hold my head up if I start to feel somewhat sheepish and inferior in the face of bullish moxy and cowboy antics, because we know now, there is something warm and fuzzy about being cautious and restrained and sometimes too polite for our own good (except when Billy Bob Thornton visits).

It's a love-hate thing. _________________________________________________

p.s. visit me at:

http://www.firedfornow.com/

Check out the forum there and add your story or get and give support.

Say NO to the Fox new reality show: It's Gotta Go!

Mon, 13 Apr 2009 15:04:59 -0400

SAY NO TO FOX PETITION

When I got wind of the stomach-churning news that Fox is mounting a new reality show called "Someone's Gotta Go", I hoped they'd start the first episode in the C-level offices of Fox -- and decide which Fox exec should be the first to be axed for this profligate, bone-headed move.

If you've not yet heard about it, here's the scoop:

The Fox television network is currently in production of a new reality show called "Someone's Gotta Go". Each episode will feature a real company with about 15 or 20 employees who decide which one of their colleagues will be laid off in order to cut costs.

This got me so angry I decided to start a petition on behalf of the millions of us who have lost jobs. Or who have had spouses laid off. Or who have had close friends, family members , neighbours or colleagues laid off and lose their income and more while feeling helpless watching from the sidelines.

And this post is a blatant shout-out to go have a look at the petition and sign your name.

Mike Darnell, chief of alternative programming at Fox, said of the show, "It's certainly no worse than watching the news every night and hearing all the statistics and watching what is happening." (That's his grinning mug up there.)

No worse? Are you for real Mike Darnell?

Exploiting and making entertainment out of the pain of millions losing their jobs while you and your network earn millions in revenue is NO WORSE than reporting the news?

Well, let’s tell Fox and Mike Darnell IT IS WORSE. And tell their potential advertisers too.

Here's the petition. Pleeeeeease click on the link and lend your name.

SAY NO TO FOX PETITION

Who knows? If enough names and criticial comments are registered, it may be just enough to scare away advertisers -- the only thing that will likely get Fox to pay attention.

Once you sign, make sure to blast out the petition to all your friends. You can upload the contacts from your email program in moments to make it a no-brainer.

You may watch every other reality show under the sun, but this one?

Tell Fox and Darnell they’ve gone too far -- even for them.

_________________________________________________

p.s. visit me at:

http://www.firedfornow.com/

Check out the forum there and add your story or get and give support.

(Or follow me on twitter @ FiredForNow)

One family beating the recession by traveling the Americas

Sat, 11 Apr 2009 15:04:11 -0400

One way to deal with the recession is to ignore it altogether. In one sense, that’s what Philly Markowitz and Myke Dyer are doing.

Philly and Myke are married to one another, have 2 kids aged 10 and 13, and when Philly lost her job two months ago, it was the catalyst to pursue a life-long fantasy: to spend months traveling and exploring, with no job to tie her down, and pay for it largely by volunteering her time in exchange for room and board.

The only difference is now she is a family of four. Philly contacted me through my blog to fill me in on their plans, and I was immediately galvanzied. Could a better way to deal with the mess all around us be just, uh, chucking it all?

“After I lost my job, it began to hit me: I’m not tied down to anything anymore. I can scramble and try frantically to find a job in an excruciating job market,” explains Philly, “Or I can just leave.”

For the past 17 years, Philly worked as a contract producer and broadcaster for the CBC, one of Canada’s national TV and radio networks. Ironically, she was made full-time just months before major cuts began. “I’m glad I got out when I did,” said Philly. “For those left, it’s been like rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic.”

Myke splits his time between managing the local natural food store and café and curating the local film festival where they live — a beautiful rural area about two hours from the city. Although CBC’s headquarters are in Toronto, Philly was able to do her job by commuting just twice weekly.

As Philly puts it, they’ve lived on “vapours of money” their entire adult lives, spending little and pouring a lot into the house they purchased when they were quite young. They’re now just two years away from paying it off completely. At least they were till now.

With the job market in their small town of 2,500 almost non-existent, the immediate option was to sell their house – in a very bad market — move to Toronto, and both look for work — with no guarantee of finding it. The idea filled Philly with fear.

But as she began to think about the possibility of using some of the equity in their home to fund an adventure, she began experiencing an enormous sense of freedom and excitement. “All of a sudden I wasn’t feeling anxiety and terror,” she says, “And I thought, if thinking about taking a year off is making me this happy, let’s do it.”

Disrupting the mortgage-free course they’d followed so responsibly in order to fund such a crazy plan made sense to her. She thought many might think her bonkers, borrowing money against their equity and giving up any chance of income. Yet, the way she sees it, they’re still young enough to size up their mortgage and delay paying off the house. Their children are at an age where they can afford to miss a year of school without significant ramifications, but that won’t be the case for much longer. And when they return after a year, the job market will hopefully be stronger.

Of course, Philly still had to get everyone in her family thinking the same way. She was afraid they’d look at her like she was nuts. The truth is she had to do very little convincing.

When she first approached Myke with the idea, Philly had to sit through some agonizing minutes of pure silence. “He was stunned for the first few minutes. I’m sure he didn’t think he heard me right,” explains Philly. “And then, slowly, very slowly, he started nodding his head.”

As for the kids Nathan and Cleo, they were on board right away. As long as they could still communicate with friends from the road via instant-messaging and Skype, they were happy to leave behind their usual routines and escape school for a year.

The first four to six weeks of the trip are already arranged with hosts ready to welcome the Markowitz-Dyer family. Through personal acquaintances and sites like couchsurfing,com, as well as community volunteering sites, Philly’s been feverishly putting their travels in motion. They’ll start by winding their way through Ontario and Quebec, then over to New Brunswick and Nova Scotia, before heading down through the American eastern seaboard with hosts lined up in Vermont, Massachusetts, Maine, Connecticut and Pennsylvania.

One of their stays will involve helping out at an off-the-grid farm. Another will be spent harvesting wild mushrooms in the bush. They’ll be collecting hay at still another farm and volunteering at a natural food co-op during a different stay

“We plan to contribute about 3 to 4 hours of volunteer work a day in exchange for room and board,” explains Philly. “The rest of the time we’ll spend exploring.” As many of their stays will be at farms or other rural areas, they plan to take breaks in urban areas so they can explore museums and other urban callings.

As they continue south, they’ll venture into Mexico, Guatemala and Belize then make their way back up the west coast of the U.S. and Canada. Philly figures they’ll cover about 40,000 kilometers – or 25,000 miles — during the 10 months they’ll be on the road. That’s about the same amount they put on their car every year given they live in the country and Philly’s twice-weekly commute to Toronto.

They’ll be scrapping their current car which has almost 300,000 kilometers on it and trading it in for a second-hand Mazda5.

As for other expenses, here’s the break-down Philly has calculated for them to live on:

WEEKLY EXPENSES

Gas and Oil $75

Phone $25

Insurance $50

Groceries $100

Road Food $50 (1 or 2 cheap restaurant meals

Lodging $50 (1 night per week in a motel or 2-3 nights at campsites)

Entertainment $50

Miscellany $50 (parking, transit, emergency purchases)

___________________________________________________________________

It all adds up to $450 a week for a family of four. Or $16 per person per day. Or $19,000 for 10 months of travel.

Philly’s factoring in some up-front purchases they’ll be making before setting off — new sleeping bags, a family international museum pass – to round off their budget at $20,000.

“I’m sure there will be weeks when we’re in the countryside where we
spend half of the $450,” explains Philly, “ but when we’re in urban centres our spending will increase. And we also hope to treat ourselves to a week in a bed-and-breakfast in Mexico, just for a vacation from our vacation.”

Philly figures that will be the challenge for her family – the intensity of continually being guests in other people’s homes. It demands a level of being on all the time.

“Myke’s an introvert, he normally needs big chunks of time to himself,” says Philly, “but being in other people’s space, there’s a need to be social and make yourself available.”

Similarly, Philly thinks the hardest part for the kids will be a need for down-time where they simply get to veg out. “That won’t be easy to give them in other people’s homes”, she says.

That’s why they’ll occasionally cut themselves some slack and take a break from staying with others. The budget allows for pitching a tent for a night or two and cooking over a fire on their own. “Otherwise,” as Philly explains, “it’s a recipe for family communication breakdown.”

I would guess that for many families, traveling together for 10 months in a closely-packed vehicle would severely test not just communication but all-round dynamics and relationships. But after speaking with Philly, my sense is that this is a family that’s going to have an incredibly rewarding adventure. The kind of adventure that many of us fantasize about, but never find a way to put into action.

I have to admit I have Philly-envy. It takes courage and spirit and a strong belief in yourself, as well as in the cosmos, to offer yourself and those you love this kind of wondrous experience. I wish her, Myke, Nathan and Cleo an adventure of a life-time. In return, they gives us a shot of inspiration at a time when it’s so badly needed.

To learn a bit more about the family, visit their page at couchsurfing.com.

_________________________________________________

p.s. visit me at:

http://www.firedfornow.com/

Check out the forum there and add your story or get and give support.

(Or follow me on twitter @ FiredForNow)