mr e's Open Salon Blog

Three Wolf Moon

Wed, 29 Jun 2011 20:06:41 -0400

You might want to check out this item on Amazon...

http://www.amazon.com/Mountain-Three-Wolf-Short-Sleeve/dp/B002HJ377A

Okay, so it's a t-shirt, you've seen one, you've seen 'em all, right?

Well... not so fast, read the *reviews* on this shirt...

Oh, and pay particular attention to the customer-supplied video review....

How Did Weinergate Become A Three-Ringed Circus?

Fri, 17 Jun 2011 08:06:59 -0400

>> How did weinergate become a media circus

Really? You have to ask?

Take one feisty politician named "Weiner" with an affinity for showing his, ah-- weener, dangle a few salacious nekkid pictures, toss in some breathless women-- one of them a boner-fide porno star-- and Voila!, faster than you can say "Vienna Sausages", you have the perfect recipe for a good case of Weiner-Envy. Considering the speed at which it was blown, out of proportion, you'd think it was laced with Viagra. And then there was Weiner himself, right in the middle, giving everybody a terrific snow job. And then, in the one hand, with all the calls for his resignation and in the other, his insistence upon sticking it out-- for awhile there you didn't know if he was coming or going. Sure the whole thing was over-inflated and it certainly had it's ups and downs, but you gotta admit a great time was had by all-- well, nearly all. Except for ole' Anthony himself, ain't nobody gonna respect him or his weener in the morning.

Would you shake this guy's hand?

Careful! You don't know where it's been...

New World Order: House on Fire

Wed, 2 Mar 2011 10:03:31 -0500

There are certain elements of society who have deep-rooted interests in people being mired in social discord.

As long as people are pitted against each other they overlook the yoke on their backs and the reins in the hands of the master. Whether the goad is in the form of the whip or the dollar, the people are subtly and expertly controlled through their biases and base emotions. When the people eventually realize that there is no real reason to hate their brothers or to disparage their races, or covet their possessions, our shadowy overlords must invent new dissatisfactions, foment new discords, and instill new fears into the minds of the people. They have a vested interest in keeping people on edge, uneasy, disquieted and unrested. Thus burdened and concerned with the daily struggles of feeding their families, the masses are easiest to control.

Our superiors claim to love freedom and the freedom of speech and the right to assemble and all of the others. For they know that as long as the people think they have freedoms, they rarely catch on to the fact that they don't. And for the few that do figure it out and get unruly at speeches and assemblies— they just lean into the microphone, give a goofy grin, and exclaim to the world how much they "love freedom of speech", whilst the goons shuffle off the poor hapless clod who misunderstood the meaning of the term.

The only hope for the people lies in the understanding that they are not the problem. They simply are as they are made in the eyes of the maker, complete with all of their strengths and weaknesses, fears and foibles and all of their personal issues and problems. And yet despite their individual faults and frailties, they are in actuality part of the great family of man— humans, who inhabit the earth together. Together they have the collective power to overthrow their oppressors, shake off their yokes, and take back their world.

But the people are controlled by those who suck out the lifeblood from their selves, their families, their friends and neighbors, and from all of the people they share their daily lives with. They think they know what's happening because they see it on TV. Whether on CNN, MSNBC, Al-Jazeera or the BBC, the great talking heads know all, see all, and say all. They tell the people what to think, what to believe, who to like, who to hate, when to vote and who to vote for. The people think they are liberals or conservatives, red or blue or independent, for this thing or against that thing, when in reality the people have very little ability to know things for themselves and are thus forced to believe and accept the views and opinions that are prepared for them. Even with the advent of the Internet, while there are occasional glimpses of reality here and there, there are also extrordinary efforts made by those in power to shut them down, limit their effect, disperse their effectiveness, or cast doubt on their validity. All the while funneling their own versions of "The Truth" on national television for all to see— presented to them by pretty faces staring out at them, with gravitas.

The people are presented with "leaders" who are carefully prepared, propped up and vetted by those who are in control. Those who do not care if the politics are left or right, or whether states are red or blue, or about human ideals such as freedom or civil rights— those in control are only concerned with power and wealth and staying in control. And they use their extrordinary influences to control and corrupt everything in their path. They need only for the people to be consumed with their petty disagreements, so as to turn their attentions away from the realities around them. Those with the power are above the politics, out of the limelight, and in the shadows. They need simply to indicate their desires and their well-groomed politicos fall over themselves to serve it up, whilst the people bicker over the table scraps.

All around the world is raging in chaos as the people are waking up to their oppression and banding together to cry out against the injustice and the crimes of their oppressors. The people are demanding their rights and taking back their freedom— and wielding it as a sword of light, an instrument of change, and a tool to forge a new beginning for themselves. And they're holding it high as a warning to those who would control and manipulate them from the shadows. Shadow oppressors everywhere beware, the message is clear: the people are mad as hell and they are not taking it any longer.

• • • • •

It is easy to dismiss these words as crazed or conspiratorial, and the reader may ardently believe that none of this is true. Instead believing that he or she is in control over his own life and master of his own destiny. The reader may believe in freedom and civil rights and that the people he elects in fact do his bidding. But for most readers, that is merely an illusion. Freedom is an elusive concept, and must be taken, wielded and exercised in order to be serviceable at all. But it must be backed by power if it is to have any effect. Without power, it is simpy an empty impotent construct, and yet even that much is comfort enough for many— nay, most, to keep them complacent. Which is exactly the effect intended by those with power. A man given a little freedom without the power to exert it is as effectively constrained as the man who is shackled with his neck under the boot of the master.

Indeed, the reader may choose to reject this premise— at his peril. But before doing so, he should ask himself whether or not the leaders he elects are really in fact working for him and doing his bidding? And if not his own bidding, then whose? And if he dares ask another, then let it be who are these leaders? Where did they come from? How is it that out of the hundreds, perhaps thousands of potentially qualified and honest candidates, only these several—perhaps two or three typically— are the only ones that are available for selection? Where are all of the others? Why is it that in an age of supposed "freedom" and "access to information" are there no more choices?

In a society that is allegedly constructed and held to be of the people, by the people and for the people, there do not seem to be very many people actually being represented at all. And more alarmingly, those in charge, along with their vassels and minions, appear to be busy looting, pillaging, and ravishing everything in sight. With large amounts of aplomb, not to mention huge clanking brass balls, they are busy stealing everything that is not nailed down and hauling it off to their lairs— their banks, their offshore accounts, their multi-million dollar mansions and luxury yachts. They know their days are numbered so they are stealing everything from the chandeliers to the silverware in a frenzied rush to grab it all and get out of town.

The irony here of course is both as sublime as it is rich...

The house is on fire and all people have to talk about is the heat.

Christine O'Donnell a Witch? Put her to the Test!

Tue, 5 Oct 2010 12:10:45 -0400

Christine O'Donnell

Paragon of Conservative, Republican Virtues

CROWD: A witch! A witch! A witch! We've got a witch! A witch!
VILLAGER #1: We have found a witch, might we burn her?
CROWD: Burn her! Burn!
BEDEMIR: How do you know she is a witch?
VILLAGER #2: She looks like one.
BEDEMIR: Bring her forward.
WITCH: I'm not a witch. I'm not a witch.
BEDEMIR: But you are dressed as one.
WITCH: They dressed me up like this.
CROWD: No, we didn't... no.
WITCH: And this isn't my nose, it's a false one.
BEDEMIR: Well?
VILLAGER #1: Well, we did do the nose.
BEDEMIR: The nose?
VILLAGER #1: And the hat -- but she is a witch!
CROWD: Burn her! Witch! Witch! Burn her!
BEDEMIR: Did you dress her up like this?
CROWD: No, no... no ... yes. Yes, yes, a bit, a bit.
VILLAGER #1: She has got a wart.
BEDEMIR: What makes you think she is a witch?
VILLAGER #3: Well, she turned me into a newt.
BEDEMIR: A newt?
VILLAGER #3: I got better.
VILLAGER #2: Burn her anyway!
CROWD: Burn! Burn her!
BEDEMIR: Quiet, quiet. Quiet! There are ways of telling whether
      she is a witch.
CROWD: Are there? What are they?
BEDEMIR: Tell me, what do you do with witches?
VILLAGER #2: Burn!
CROWD: Burn, burn them up!
BEDEMIR: And what do you burn apart from witches?
VILLAGER #1: More witches!
VILLAGER #2: Wood!
BEDEMIR: So, why do witches burn?
      [pause]
VILLAGER #3: B--... 'cause they're made of wood...?
BEDEMIR: Good!
CROWD: Oh yeah, yeah...
BEDEMIR: So, how do we tell whether she is made of wood?
VILLAGER #1: Build a bridge out of her.
BEDEMIR: Aah, but can you not also build bridges out of stone?
VILLAGER #2: Oh, yeah.
BEDEMIR: Does wood sink in water?
VILLAGER #1: No, no.
VILLAGER #2: It floats! It floats!
VILLAGER #1: Throw her into the pond!
CROWD: The pond!
BEDEMIR: What also floats in water?
VILLAGER #1: Bread!
VILLAGER #2: Apples!
VILLAGER #3: Very small rocks!
VILLAGER #1: Cider!
VILLAGER #2: Great gravy!
VILLAGER #1: Cherries!
VILLAGER #2: Mud!
VILLAGER #3: Churches -- churches!
VILLAGER #2: Lead -- lead!
ARTHUR: A duck.
CROWD: Oooh.
BEDEMIR: Exactly! So, logically...,
VILLAGER #1: If... she.. weighs the same as a duck, she's made of wood.
BEDEMIR: And therefore--?
VILLAGER #1: A witch!
CROWD: A witch!
BEDEMIR: We shall use my larger scales!
      [yelling]
BEDEMIR: Right, remove the supports!
      [whop]
      [creak]
CROWD: A witch! A witch!
WITCH: It's a fair cop.
CROWD: Burn her! Burn! [yelling]
BEDEMIR: Who are you who are so wise in the ways of science?
ARTHUR: I am Arthur, King of the Britons.
BEDEMIR: My liege!
ARTHUR: Good Sir knight, will you come with me to Camelot,
      and join us at the Round Table?
BEDEMIR: My liege! I would be honored.
ARTHUR: What is your name?
BEDEMIR: Bedemir, my leige.
ARTHUR: Then I dub you Sir Bedemir, Knight of the Round Table.

Koran Burning

Wed, 8 Sep 2010 17:09:16 -0400

Pastor Terry Jones plans to burn a stack of Korans on September 11 in what he calls "International Burn a Koran Day". Nearly everybody on the planet within range of a radio, TV or Internet connection has heard about it and has been busy weighing-in with their (nearly unanimous) opinions and, not to mention, giving Terry Jones and his church an unimaginable amount of free publicity. And Muslims around the world are said to be "outraged" and "up in arms" over the plan.

Amazing.

I think the idea of burning the Korans is pretty dumb. But that said, if the Koran is the "uninterrupted, unchangeable, and eternal word of God", then how can burning their physical incarnation have any effect on their eternal meaning? Surely the word of God-- Allah-- is mightier than a piece of paper in a book?

And if Muslims are truly "enlightened" and confident in their religion, then what does it matter what one lunatic does with copies of the book? Which are probably written in English anyway. For years Muslims have implored the rest of the world to "understand" that the acts of Al Quaeda were the actions of religious extremists and that "tolerance" should prevail. And yet here they are, up in arms and "upset" over the actions-- correction, the about-to-be, hasn't-happened-yet actions-- of religious extremists. At least when "Christians" get upset, they are upset about something that (some, purported) Muslims have actually already done.

But, if the about-to-be, hasn't-happened-yet action is, in fact, about to occur, why doesn't Allah stop it?

It seems to me that Islam suffers from one of the same fundamental "problems" of Christianity, namely the apparent need of God / Allah, whatever name you choose to use-- "the deity's" word to be interpreted for the masses.

My question is this: If God or Allah is so powerful, omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent-- and the words so universal-- why does God need a mouthpiece?