patricia k's Open Salon Blog

Why I Treasure Fall (photo essay)

Thu, 19 Nov 2009 19:11:25 -0500

Although Summer is the carefree and fun season, I love Fall's beauty and comfortable temperatures. It's hard to beat the the midwest when it comes to Fall. Below are some pictures I took....trying to capture the mystery and beauty of it all.....

This picture was taken near Little Rock, Arkansas where I hiked and rapelled with my oldest son.

The rest are taken in Missouri...mainly in my own yard. (There is a pond in our backyard.)

Even the fallen leaves on our deck are gorgeous!

Where Is TheObsoleteMan? I'm Concerned.

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 22:11:33 -0500

Has anyone heard from TheObsoleteMan? To tell you the truth, I am concerned about him. He hasn't written anything for awhile and I've sent him a couple of pm's and he hasn't returned them. That is not like him. If anyone knows anything about him....please let me know. I'm worried and wondering.

Should I put a picture of him on a milk carton?!

I Hate Menopause!

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 11:11:32 -0500

I don't like the stage I'm going through right now. As a matter of fact, I hate it. I'm sure it has a lot to do with being 50 and trying to juggle all that's going on in my life.

On one hand, there is no one thing that's really awful or that insurmountable. I've got my health, my family is healthy and I live comfortably. I almost feel bad about even complaining about anything especially when there are so many others in this world who are suffering. There are so many gifts in my life to be grateful for....and I truly appreciate them all. Gifts such as excellent health, an enjoyable and comfortable life style, super friends, good family, a home and neighborhood that I truly enjoy, more than enough activities and interests to keep me busy, dreams for my future, a Catholic faith that feeds me spiritually and books to read for the rest of my life!

So what's the problem? To be frank, I think it's the oncoming of menopause....the transition in my life that I've dreaded ever since I was old enough to learn about it. It's something physical that I can point fingers at simply because I'm experiencing its realities.

I hate the uninvited hot flashes that hit me without warning. By the time I notice the heat building within my body, it's too late to try to counteract the hot demon. It doesn't matter what I'm doing during the day. I can be paying bills, running at the park, driving in the car, cooking, teaching my kids etc. and all of a sudden my body heats up to feverish temperatures while my face turns blushing pink. This heat wave that lasts only a minute or so cannot be controlled or soothed....unless I open up the sliding doors and welcome in the crispy cool Fall temperatures. Apparently, hot flashes don't need sleep because they pester me at night also. One minute I'm cozily covered by my blankets enjoying their warmth....the next minute, I'm throwing them off because I'm so hot. After I'm cooled down, I go seeking their warmth once again. This happens at least two or three times throughout each night. Coupled with waking up because of the slightest sounds, it seems like I'm always tired.

Another side effect of menopause is struggling with weight loss. I'd love to lose 20 pounds and even though I eat way less than I did a decade ago.....AND continue running two miles three times a week....it seems like I'm getting heavier. What's with that?! I'm also surrounded with two beautiful model-like daughters who are thin. They look soooo wonderful in their fashionable outfits that it inspires me to want to lose weight. I wouldn't want to be as slim as them.....but thinner than I am would be fabulous!

My emotional state is almost back to where it was when I was a teenager....or when a pregnant woman. Lately, I've cried twice....for no real reason.....and I'm not one to cry....unless I'm watching a sad or sentimental movie. I hate the influx of emotions. At least when I was a teenager, I had college, career, marriage and children to look forward to. When I was pregnant fighting a roller coaster of emotions, I was young and had a brand new baby to look forward to. At fifty I've "been there done that," and have less to look forward to. As a matter of fact, when I look into the future, I see more aging taking over my body.....an empty house because the children have grown.....dying parents and other loved ones.....and ultimately, death. To say the least, I'm not excited. Of course I've some plans, ideas and even dreams for my future and that helps to keep me going when I'm feeling down.....but I so badly miss the stage of my life when I was bringing new life into the world. I miss having a baby on my hip, cradling them and seeing their faces light up when entering a room. I miss their sweetness and innocence. I miss being needed and wanted by them. Oh sure, my older kids still need me at times for a lift or for some help here and there....but mostly, I feel unappreciated.

I'm also having a harder time dealing with my 73 year old parents. Not sure if it's the invasion of menopause that's causing my frustrations with them or simply my age. I never had real criticisms of them until I moved out and started raising my own family....and even then, anything negative I felt toward them was truly not that big of a deal. I also realize that my own grown kids are going to have their own criticisms toward me as they mature and live their lives the way they think is best. But lately, I am more easily annoyed by their actions and lack of actions. I won't go listing them here because it's not important, but I wrestle with the question, " Is my annoyance because of how I'm changing (and I blame menopause) or because of how they have changed?"

If this is what menopause is about....then I already hate it. Any suggestions?

Let's Kill The Liberals!

Fri, 6 Nov 2009 09:11:31 -0500

"If you were in a room with Hitler, Mussolini, and a Liberal and had a gun with two bullets, what do you do?.......Shoot the Liberal twice. Hahaha"

I'm beginning to realize that I need to delete the Facebook friends who make stupid Republican comments or jokes, in this example. The above was a comment a Facebook friend left on the Facebook "home" feed. What makes the deleting a little more complicated is that the above Facebook friend is my nephew who lives in Texas. When I see comments like this, especially coming from a family member, I feel compelled and almost obliged to respond. I responded with: "Do you have any liberals in mind? (More than half of your family are Democrats!) Also, are you saying that Hitler and Mussolini are better than Democrats/Liberals? Come on Matt, think about what you're saying."

After my nephew and brother verbally "ganged" up on me for my comment.....you can probably figure out the ensuing comments: Liberals can't take a joke and I'm looking silly for the comment I made etc. I simply told him that I don't think it's ever funny to joke about killing....especially in light of past school killings and other public murders in our country.

I would like to go back and add the recent killing spree at Ft. Hood in Texas as another example. As tempted as I am to do that, I've decided to restrain myself and just let the discussion end. Hopefully, my points will not look as "silly" now with the recent Texas tragedy.

When are the far right Republicans going to wake up?!

Republican Facebook Friend: She's Lying Or She's Ungrateful

Wed, 4 Nov 2009 10:11:57 -0500

Even though I've been called naive and gullible a time or two, I tend to see the glass half full rather than half empty. I'm also one who can usually see both sides of an issue or an argument even though I am burdened with my own set of opinions, values, principles, ideas and rules. I'm stubborn, but always willing to listen and re-evaluate if needed....especially when the other side makes sense to me.

All of the above holds true politically also, but it seems like no matter how hard I try to understand and appreciate the Republican/Conservative side, I just about....not "just" about, I ALWAYS feel frustration and anger when I hear or read anything coming from the far right side.

I'm just plain tired of their rhetoric, lies, mean-spiritedness, and assumptions.

When I receive political e-mails from acquaintances of mine....they're mainly from the Republicans. Nothing wrong with that except they're unkind, false and highly inflamatory. I've even tried to convince this particular man to stop sending me the junk e-mails explaining why you can't believe most of what you read on the internet. I've even gone as far as sharing my side explaining why I am a Democrat, but to no avail. He continues sending me his political hate mail. What is he trying to prove?

On Facebook I usually don't post political statements although I will post touching youtube videos as well as leave comments on other's political statements. (It's difficult for me NOT to say anything when I'm feeling passionate about something.)

Not that long ago, I posted a thought provoking video (one of OpenSalon RonP01's videos) showing why we need reformed health insurance. I didn't say anything about it except for introducing it as an example of why I support reformed health insurance.

Not only would you not believe the "debate" that ensued because of it, I was appalled at one contributor specifically who angrily spewed out snobbish points why she was against government health care. Her heated contribution came right after a friend of mine explained why she wanted reform also. This friend of mine presented a personal case of her own where she lost her doctor (the only one out of quite a few who diagnosed her ailment properly) because of the demands of her health insurance. My friend is now concerned where she is going to go for continued treatment and care. Below are the points the Republican contributor made in response to my friend.

They cannot run the programs they are in charge of, therefore they will not be able to run this one. The best predictor of future perfomance is PAST performance.
1. never understand why people want the gov't to take care of them instead of taking care of themselves
2. whomever PAYS RUNS the program...at least this is how it works in MY business, I pay, I say how it is run.
3. why do people think they are entiled to 'something" for nothing? I am entitled to health care, I just don't think I should have to pay fot it.
4. I have worked, risked, lost, gained, to be where I am. I have taken nothing that i didnt work my butt off for. No one gave it to me. ...
5. If you give it away free, it has no value. Who is going to pay the Drs. you want this free health care from?

Notice, no regard for what my friend said concerning her heath issue and having to find another doctor because of what her insurance dictates. No empathy whatsoever for my friend's situation.

As my husband said, this Republican contributor is either lying or is an ungrateful person. No person gets anywhere in this life without some help in one form or another. This help may be a lucky break, strong genetic inheritance, wealthy parents, a dynamic teacher, mentor, friends, or perhaps customers who have contributed to the supposed success of this self righteous woman.

As I mentioned in the beginning, I try to remain positive and open minded to both sides.....but I am repulsed by what continually flows from the mouths of the Republican/Conservative side.