Robyn Martins's Open Salon Blog

Manteresting.com—Creating Unnecessary Division

Thu, 22 Mar 2012 07:03:29 -0400

It never fails that one good idea spawns copycats. Some creative person introduces a new book series or electronic gadget or website; and within months of its initial success, someone who wished they’d thought of it first introduces something a lot like it only different.

This has happened to Pinterest, a social website that provides users a space to collect favorite images and to be inspired by the collections of others. The vast majority of Pinterest users are women, and many of the images lean feminine in nature—plenty of clothes, cute shoes and craft ideas.

In response, we now have Manteresting.com, a site very similar to Pinterest only different. It’s designed for men, which is evident the minute you arrive on the home page because the masthead features bold, block lettering, and the tag line reads, “Interesting. Man. Things.”

Despite its generic layout, a visit to Pinterest can put you in mind of a pampering spa, but you’ll find the antidote at Manteresting where you’ll feel more like you’re in a garage. In fact, there you nail images to virtual workbenches instead of carefully pinning them to bulletin boards as you would at the other site.

At first glance, you get the impression the floors are grimy, and the walls are covered with PG-13 pin-ups and motorcycle calendars. Guys sitting on the Adirondack chairs they have just built with their new power tools are talking about cars and tattoos and sexy celebrities. The air smells like something wrapped in bacon on the barbecue out back, and someone offers you a cold beer and a jalapeño popper on a crumbled paper napkin.

This description may seem one-dimensional and sexist, and it should. It’s based solely on a stereotype, which means it does not tell the complete story. If you spend any time at this male-oriented site, you quickly see that men have a wide variety of interests. They post baby pictures, offer inspiring quotes, reveal their dream homes and imagine traveling to remote destinations worthy of a postcard. Men think about shoes and food and kitchen designs and family; and they pay tribute to their heroes and share their favorite music, books and movies.

True, men also think about exhaust systems and comic books and women in skimpy skirts, but the overall impression I get from scrolling through the posts of Manteresting users is that they aren’t too different from what women are posting at Pinterest. Men aren’t thinking “man” things. They’re thinking mankind things.

For every image posted at one site, you’ll find a corresponding one at the other. In equal measure, both genders share an interest in traveling, laughter and good food. To my dismay, you’ll find a recipe for meatloaf cupcakes with mashed potato “frosting” at either site. And for every man posting a photo of Jennifer Anniston, there is a woman posting a photo of Ryan Gosling in one of the most encouraging memes ever created.

With all of these images being shared, the difference seems nothing more than a matter of semantics to me. One person nails a photo to a bench, while the other pins it to a board. So, this begs the question—if men and women are so similar apart from color and font preferences, why are we encouraged to segregate in what amounts to gender ghettos?

Neither website officially excludes users of the other gender. In fact, they claim to welcome interaction; so intentionally dividing us by gender seems to only emphasize unfair stereotypes, when what we need is to shatter them in order to tell the complete story.

We can only tell that complete story with more collaboration between men and women, with all of us sharing ideas on an equal plane, because we are not opposing sides of our species. We are complementary. And in all areas of life, we are made weaker when we create unnecessary divisions between us and made stronger when we team up.

Of course, it makes no difference whether someone chooses a social website designed for males or one that is mostly used by women, or for that matter, whether someone steers clear of the Internet all together. These websites are merely indicative of a larger problem. What matters is how we interact with each other. We need more opportunities to join forces, not to retreat to our separate corners.

"Casablanca" at 70—A National Treasure

Thu, 15 Mar 2012 08:03:04 -0400

There are films that hold your attention at least until the credits roll, and there are films that leave a more lasting impression, and you decide to add them to your private collection. And then there are films that will forever be embedded in your psyche; and whether you own them personally or not, you will always name them on your list of favorites.

For me, dozens of movies fit in the first category, and I have built a DVD collection of some films I find worthy of owning. But I maintain a short list of films I treasure, I mean absolutely cherish, the kind of films you would pass onto your children as their birthright. “Casablanca” ranks at the top of that list, so I nearly hooted in public when I learned it will soon return to theaters for a one-night screening.

On March 21, Turner Classic Movies will host the event in theaters across the country in honor of the film’s 70^th anniversary. If I haven’t already beaten you to the theater, save me a seat, because I’ll be just around the corner.

“Casablanca” has been described as a sentimental love story, and even one Warner Brothers script reader called it “sophisticated hokum.” But I see the film as so much more—it’s a triumphal statement for human perseverance and against the driving principles of the Third Reich. The romance between the main characters, portrayed by Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman, is merely a device for telling the weightier story.

The playwrights chose Casablanca as the setting specifically because it was a major stop for refugees fleeing Nazi-occupied Europe. Desperate Europeans gathered there in a holding pattern until they gained safe passage to the United States.

In the film, these very real stories from World War II play out as refugees congregate nightly at Rick’s Café Américain, a haven owned by Bogart’s character, because as they say, “Champagne takes the sting out of being occupied.”

The French are in charge, but in march the Germans to assert their dominance. Never are the rising tensions and fraying nerves more acute than one evening in the club when Nazi officers begin belting out a popular German song. In response, the café orchestra answers with a fierce French anthem, and everyone joins in to drown out the occupiers. “Tremble, tyrants and traitors, the shame of all good men,” goes their impassioned singing.

Characters like Peter Lorre’s Ugarte, his hair and forehead shining with the same greasy sheen, fight for scraps; S. Z. Sakall’s affable Carl works the room to provide some comic relief; and Conrad Veidt’s Major Strasser elicits chilling hatred as the imposing Nazi authority.

On the surface, the setting is pure Hollywood, but if you look a little deeper, you see art imitating real life. Lorre and Sakall, both Hungarian born, left Germany in response to the rise of the Nazi party. Paul Henried, from Austria, left Europe in the 1930s to escape fascism as well. And those singing patrons in the café? They are actual refugees working as extras in the film, and their fervent tears are real.

Veidt’s story alone would make for a memorable film. He was an accomplished silent-film actor in Germany and starred in the nation’s first talking picture. He was known for anti-Nazi sentiments, however, and the Gestapo set out to assassinate him. But Veidt was able to escape ahead of the death squad, and he fled to England.

After becoming a British citizen, he reportedly gave much of his estate and a portion of his salary to the war effort. How ironic that he and other actors like him—upwards of 30 nationalities worked on this project— chose to represent the very people they were fleeing in order to create a film like “Casablanca.”

Yes, there is ample sentimental mush in this film, what with “Here’s looking at you, kid,” and the like. But the story isn’t about the lost love between Rick and Ilsa, parting ways in the rain and fog while plane engines roar. It’s about what happens afterward.

If any film deserves a revival on the big screen, it’s “Casablanca.” Plenty of films portray good versus evil or liberty versus aggression, but few do it well, and the staying power of this one makes it a national—and a personal—treasure.

International Women's Day

Thu, 8 Mar 2012 07:03:53 -0500

or Courageous Women Bring Hope

Today is International Women’s Day, celebrated with hundreds of events around the world designed to call attention to the state of being female in the year 2012.

For example, a music store will host a concert in Portland, Ore. highlighting women composers, and Sudanese Women Empowerment for Peace will sponsor an all-day festival in Khartoum. Christian women in Trinidad and Tobago will gather for an afternoon celebration, and an international team of women is just about to complete a seven-day expedition in the Norwegian Arctic Circle.

It all sounds festive, but as this special day and days like it roll around every year, I become increasingly discouraged. “Really? We’re still doing this?” I ask out loud, naively hoping we might have finally reached the point in our social development when we no longer need to spotlight the condition of people whose lives are difficult simply because they are women. But here we are yet again, and the prospect of gender equality can seem hopeless.

For most of us in “developed” countries, life is no more challenging than it is for men, and our gender plays only a small factor in what we overcome day to day. But for millions of women who happen to have been born female in more patriarchal societies, daily life can be a burden. Merely surviving is the goal.

In wide swaths of the world, women and girls are more likely to live in poverty than men and more likely to be classified as chronically hungry. They are more likely to be victims of violence within their own homes, to be undereducated and to be denied justice and equal rights by their governments than are men living in their same towns and villages.

And they have not brought this gross discrimination upon themselves—women are often working against dispiriting odds. Case in point: even though they produce more than half of the food in developing countries, they own less than 20 percent of the land. How ironic when you consider that, according to U.N. statistics, they could increase farm production enough to lift more than 100 million people out of poverty if only they were granted the same resources as their male counterparts.

On their website, IWD sponsors have provided a series of photos produced by Reuters—perhaps they anticipated we might need some cheering up; and the slideshow, entitled “A Woman’s World,” has become the antidote to my discouragement. In it are candid shots of women playing and working, laughing and in mourning. There are brides, shop owners, athletes, beauty contestants, first aid workers and entrepreneurs.

In one shot, a refugee from Myanmar cares for her small children amidst the squalor of a garbage dump, better than life at home. In another, a lone Chinese woman raises a fist in protest before a row of armed security forces even as she leans on a crutch. And in another, women walk to the school they opened for children in a Jakarta slum.

These images of women living lives so far removed from my own cushioned one gave me hope against the dispiriting statistics because what all these women demonstrate is the will to carve out the best life they are able and to live it fully. Whether it’s the group of women in burqas riding in a taxi in Kabul or the woman burying her son, Spc. Anthony Lightfoot, who was killed in battle in Afghanistan, they are all doing the best they can and hoping for better.

And they live so courageously as to pull me out of my funk, reminding me that seemingly unbeatable odds don’t necessarily define the battle. It’s the forward motion that does it, and sometimes just putting one foot in front of the other can take you far enough toward the goal to count as a win, a small but significant win

So, we mark another day to remember that women around the world, as determined as they may be, still have a long road ahead toward gender equality. I look forward to the year when our calendar will be free of such days, when women everywhere will live as not better than and not less than men, but as equals. Until then, the bravery of today’s women will be our hope.

Pinterest—A Modern-Day Memoir

Thu, 1 Mar 2012 08:03:48 -0500

As if I didn’t already spend enough time on the Internet, I have fallen prey to another site and have added Pinterest.com to my daily rounds. I had heard about the site months ago but dismissed it. Then, I dipped in for a few minutes and was hooked, line and sinker.

At Pinterest, users create online bulletin boards categorized by topics such as gardening, art and travel. As a virtual hunter and gatherer, you spot something on the Internet you’d like to share, “pin” it to one of your bulletin boards, and then the related photograph and site link appear on the Pinterest home page for others to see. If another user re-pins your image, you receive an email notification signed, “Happy pinning.”

The website is relatively new, but it has already amassed more than ten million registered users and clocks more than 1,000 hits every 60 seconds. Businesses have taken notice and are quickly learning to use Pinterest to their benefit.

Commerce aside, the site appears to be about self-expression more so than shopping, despite the many photographs of clothing and home décor. Someone may post a dozen images of boots they long for, but they’re likely window-shopping. And they may collect an album’s worth of photos of their dream bathroom, but they really are just dreaming.

I’d love to vacation in Italy, their post suggests, or I wish I could spend winters in Fiji, says the photograph of the sunlit beach. But they don’t spend winters in Fiji. They spend winters in Ohio, and they’re taking imaginary shelter from the wind and oppressive cloud cover.

They may post a photograph of an otherworldly landscape in China where they have no intention of going, but isn’t it fascinating? Take a look at this hairstyle or this wedding dress or this idea for a children’s party. What do you think of this upholstered chair or this chocolate cake, the best ever?

Lest you become discouraged by the seeming shallowness of all of these pinners, they are also spreading news about health, family and global issues. They are sharing tips about child development, discussing history and science and posting images of art from around the world. They are sharing recipes for all levels of culinary skill and craft projects that display great creativity and resourcefulness.

Already, I am determined to learn to transfer old family photographs to stretched canvas, and my next dinner party may well include a recipe for roasted peanut soup. I have learned how to make tea from apple peels, that the deepest point in the Atlantic Ocean is 27,560 feet; and that the number of wild Arabian Oryx, once labeled extinct, is now up to 1,000.

All of this information is readily available elsewhere, but what draws me to Pinterest is that each tidbit has been culled by an individual who has found it worthy of personal attention. The site is all about self-expression, meeting our need for space to dream, to educate and to display beauty—with few exceptions, the posted images are lovely and inviting.

I have wondered how people expressed themselves before the advent of the Internet and social networking sites like Pinterest. Some would say our ancestors were not so self-absorbed, but I tend to believe human nature doesn’t change much era to era. It’s the tools we have at our disposal that change, and they haven’t made us narcissistic; they’ve just broadened our audience.

Decades ago, my grandmother wrote her memoirs out by hand as a form of self-expression, describing food, clothing, childhood pets and family history; and she gave her children the notebooks that told her life story. When you look at the bulletin boards people create on Pinterest and evaluate them as a whole, you can see they form a kind of memoir, with images people have chosen to represent their lives and to tell their stories.

My grandmother’s generation likely would have made full use of such a resource and would have filled their bulletin boards with loads of photographs of the things they most enjoyed in life. Now, outside the confines of a spiral-bound, their descendants can say, “This is me and my life as told through images of what I find beautiful and interesting and of significant value. This is my story.” Happy pinning.

Good Fences

Thu, 23 Feb 2012 08:02:12 -0500

February is Dog Training Education Month, so it seems fitting we would be in the process of training our dog. I notice, though, the designation suggests more than just teaching the dog a few new tricks—it’s clear the dog owners must learn to teach before offering even the first treat.

When my husband and I enrolled our puppy in a training class, we immediately discovered we were the ones being trained. We learned to be consistent, friendly and patient yet firm, to be prudent with the treats and, in general, to be pack leaders.

After we mastered the art of teaching our new dog to sit, lay, walk on the leash without wrenching a shoulder and play with the cat without flinging it, we decided it was time for a potty bell. Several dog-owning friends recommended a bell that the dog rings when he needs to go outside. Big Puppy was so quick to learn this trick that now it’s clear we have been trained. You can almost see his mischievous wheels turning—hmmm, every time I ring the bell, they run for the door. I like this bell business, he mumbles to himself.

Bell mastered, we are now in the stage of teaching our puppy how to live within the boundaries of an invisible fence. It works this way—an underground wire outlines the yard and interacts with a collar, first emitting beeps when the dog approaches, and then a static charge that is strong enough to suggest he step back within his designated territory.

We are almost thoroughly trained, the lot of us, and Big Puppy seems to enjoy his new space. He can now run untethered to chase sticks, examine deer tracks and sniff for moles to his content. But his freedom has limits. He may go so far and no farther without consequences.

At times, I watch him gaze out beyond the invisible fence line, and I wonder if he is dreaming of the day he might bound through the force field and run like the wind. I imagine an entire anthropomorphic monolog in which he says, “There must be wonderful things out there, things I cannot see or smell from where I sit, or these people wouldn’t go to so much trouble to keep me here. Don’t they know the world is meant for me to explore, me with my insatiable appetites?” he shouts in a frustrated plea for a world without fences.

But then I remember something I learned in the puppy training class—dogs actually like boundaries. They are pack animals that acknowledge leaders and recognize rules for the sake of their safety and well-being. It is in their nature to explore to some extent, but they almost always come home, and knowing exactly where that space begins and where it ends makes all the difference.

It isn’t very different for their human counterparts. Even those of us who don’t like rules or who claim we have too many laws can at least recognize that a certain number of our rules and laws—a certain length of fence line—bring with them a sense of security.

We build visible and invisible fences for all manner of reasons. Those put up out of irrational fear and insecurity, those are the ones worth tearing down. But we build needed figurative and literal fences for privacy and for safety, for protection against our enemies and our weaknesses, and to keep civilized society from imploding.

And we build fences around what we call Home. It’s our turf and our sanctuary. Whether we leave it for a few hours or for a few weeks, we almost always come back to it. And knowing exactly where it is, where it begins and where it ends, makes all the difference.

As Robert Frost said, “Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up.” Big Puppy may not be able to see his fence, and despite my tendency to attribute human reasoning to his canine brain, I doubt he understands why we put it there.

He’ll just have to trust his people on this one because, like him, we’ve been trained to live within one fence or another, and most of them are there for good reason.