sweetfeet's Open Salon Blog

How I Met My Favorite Dork

Mon, 23 Nov 2009 17:11:23 -0500

I saw this guy at a book signing of one of my favorite authors. I first spotted him schmoozing with the author before it started, motorcycle helmet in hand. Points for that. I later looked up from my seat in the audience and saw him sitting in the row in front of me. Nicely shaved head, leather jacket. Not too tall, not too short, a bit dorky looking. Clearly intelligent, as he was attending the same book signing I was. Beautiful blue eyes. I watched him for a long time. I was in the process of re-evaluating my requirements for the men I was dating, and this one looked like a nice change. But would he date me? He looked awfully young, a good ten years younger than I. He wouldn’t be interested in me at all. And I had no idea how to approach him. So I sat, and observed, and when he looked in my direction, I smiled my most brilliant and flirty smile.

He looked right through me. Oh well.

Several days later (or was it weeks? He knows, he keeps track), I was online checking my matches on Match.com. Up popped a young gentleman, who noticed that I had mentioned a particular author in my profile. Why yes, I replied, I’d read his book, and recently met the author at a book signing. He responded with “I was at that signing too.” I didn’t recognize him from the photographs. We compared seating, and I sat back from the computer, my heart palpitating, drawing deep breaths. NO way. Not the same guy.

Yep, the same guy.

It was his last day on the site. He had contacted me because I had mentioned that author, but saw other things he liked. I saw a few things I liked too. We did the usual exchange of emails and phone conversations before our first date, which was the most magical first date I have ever had (really, I’m not exaggerating). It has been three and a half years. He is kind, sweet, loving, attentive, intelligent, rides that sexy motorcycle, and as it happens, is seven years younger than I am. Proof that reading books is good for you.

Because you are alive and loved

Mon, 9 Nov 2009 22:11:37 -0500

Every year at this time I send a message to people that I love on the occasion of my mother’s birthday. For those who don’t already know, a little background. My mom’s 73^rd birthday would have been today, November 9. In 1981, just before she turned 43 and I turned 18, she died of ovarian cancer. She battled it for over two years. Several years ago, I lost a friend and mentor to breast cancer, the woman who originally hired me at my current job. Last year, I lost another friend and mentor to lung cancer. She was my Buddhist meditation teacher. All of these women were marvelous: inspiring mothers, teachers, guides, healers and leaders. All moved through life with amazing grace and compassion. All influenced and motivated me in my work, my parenting, and my relationships. And so, in the memory of mom, Jennifer, and Trisha, I say this:

Get thee a mammogram

Get thee a colonoscopy

Get thee a pap smear

Get thee to your dermatologist

Get thee whatever blood tests are relevant

Get it, just get it

Early detection is our best ally in fighting cancer. We have astounding medical technology available to us. Yes, there are sometimes false positives, yes, there can be added stress when undergoing a test, and yes it’s a pain in the neck to get it done. But the hassles of the tests are insignificant compared with the consequences of letting the cancer grow in your body (if I may be so blunt). Be preventative. Do what you need to do. Do it for yourself, for your children, for your spouses, for your loved ones of all kinds. Do it for your friends, for the discoveries you have yet to make in your life, for the lessons you have yet to teach and to learn, for the gifts you have to give and be given. Do it because people love you and you love them. Do it because you can. Do it because people survive cancer. I know many. And I am grateful every day for their presence in my life.

Each one of you has tremendous value and importance to more people than you can count. Take care of yourselves.

Namaste,

Linda

Not a piece of fabulous writing, just my adorable kid

Sat, 7 Nov 2009 13:11:24 -0500

Remember that whole thing about the costume? Well, here she is, in the costume I made for her. :)

Heart Tart

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 21:10:27 -0400

My Daughter Likes Pink

Sun, 25 Oct 2009 14:10:46 -0400

Not the color, the artist. Or, perhaps I should say, the rock star. My nine-year-old daughter’s current favorite song is Pink’s “So What?” in which Pink lashes out at her ex-husband by bragging about her rock star status. Vigorously and with lots of screaming guitar. The whole album, “Funhouse,” is one big lob of angry spit at her ex. It reminds me of Alanis Morissette’s “Jagged Little Pill” of a few years ago. Great angry-girl music that all women need to get us through those nasty breakups. I did buy the “clean” version of the album, but its themes and emotions are pretty sophisticated, and I find myself spending a lot of time discussing the songs with my daughter. Still, I think she understands the anger that results from rejection, at least to a small degree, and I am banking on her developing strength and tools with which to deal with future pain by listening to Pink’s music (and mom’s interpretation of it). Right now, she just likes the rhythm and the wildness of it, but even children have those kinds of emotions, and isn’t it great that music allows her to release the stress of day-to-day life? She listens to that song and says, “Music makes me feel so good!”

I do have some reservations about her listening to it, but honestly, I have to turn it all into a lesson, because my girl is going to listen to this music; she is exposed to it everywhere. And I’d hate for her to be singing lyrics like “ So I’m gonna drink my money, I’m not gonna pay his rent” without having some background knowledge. I find myself saying “Pink’s a strong woman, but she’s a party girl. Strong is good, Party girl is not.” We’ll see if it sticks. She’s a pretty sophisticated kid, she gets it. And if she doesn’t, she files it away and pulls it out of that amazing brain of hers when she needs it. Really, I’ll be hearing about it months from now when she puts a few things together. But I’ll bet that I’m thinking about it a lot more than she is.

Besides, I like Pink. Her music allows me to unleash my angry emotions. And that’s a healthy thing, right? It’s also quite bonding. Just this morning we were singing at the top of our lungs on the way to school, me banging on the steering wheel with my free hand while the kid rapped on the back of the seat. It was very refreshing.