Thoth's Open Salon Blog

Eve versus Lilith: The Original Catfight

Tue, 24 Nov 2009 06:11:39 -0500

“In the beginning, there was doggy style; then man-on-top; then woman took man from woman.”

Thoth

Eve and Lilith graduate from university the same year, two strong independent women. Eve works for a women’s magazine, becomes the editor in chief; but best of all, now she writes “Dr.” before her name after she earns a degree in psychology. Lilith opens a successful women’s clothing shop. Unlike most women best friends, Eve and Lilith are nothing alike. Eve is a thin tall beautiful-faced blonde with long hair, gorgeous azure eyes and prominent breasts—a mainstream’s dream. Lilith is an exceptionally feminine five feet four fair voluptuous brunette with big brown eyes and long adorning lashes. Even though she sells fashion, Lilith is nowhere near au courant ideologically or physically.

Enjoying the façade of their perceived superiority by the rest of the women at a party, Eve and Lilith find themselves unintentionally joining the rest of the pack in a gynoid sensory fanfare—murmurs, giggles, legs and hips shifting, and muffled clitorises buzzing mixed with a plethora of exploding vaginal scents—announcing the arrival of Jack. Both Eve and Lilith instantly fall in love with Jack; for, what’s not to love? Jack is a tall, dark, confident, intelligent, funny and extremely handsome dandy.

Jack is an upcoming actor/writer who later builds himself a fine reputation in Hollywood as a respected and professional producer and casting director; because, although he is knee-deep in pussy he doesn’t fuck actors. Jack dances with Eve and Lilith, one at a time. And even though Lilith makes Jack comes in his pants, Jack falls for Eve, asks her to marry him and she says yes. Heartbroken for first time in her life and believing that Jack is rightfully hers, Lilith still decides never to seduce her best friend’s, now, husband, again.

Ten happy years and two beautiful children later, Eve thinks there must be something wrong with a fop who does not fib. She starts to resent her perfect loving husband. Jack, on the other hand, loves Eve so much and tries his best to understand and tolerate his wife’s inexplicable estrangement and hostility. Watching Jack suffers; Lilith confronts Eve, and defends Jack. Angry and unsatisfied with Eve’s jejune responses, Lilith finally lets it out: “you don’t deserve him.” “No, he does not deserve me; if he’s so fucking great, you marry him…I’m sorry, Lilith, I didn’t mean it; I can’t think straight…I’m taking the kids to Disneyland for the weekend…I’ll call you tomorrow,” said Eve.

The long shower does not help; sad Jack sits in silence; he misses his cold wife; he misses his children; he grieves. He looks up and sees Lilith standing there, but not the Lilith he knows. This is the lascivious Lilith he danced with ten years ago; the Lilith who knows that a dandy will not mount until she squats before him. Lilith carries Jack into the heavens; she gives him the ride of a man’s life. Then, Lilith leaves an ecstatic penis, a guilty Jack, and foreign thong and lipstick for Eve to find when she returns.

Eve divorces Jack and kicks him out of his Brentwood house; he moves to an apartment in West Hollywood close to his children. Jack never stops asking for Eve’s forgiveness. Moreover, seeing his wretched state close friends and acquaintances, including some famous stars, approach Eve and plead Jack’s case to no avail. Regardless of what they say to her, Eve’s response is always, “he lied to me. How can I trust him?” This is the gold standard slogan of breakups.

Meanwhile, Jack refuses to see Lilith for a year. Two years later, Lilith finally marries the love of her life, has her first child, Adam, a beautiful baby boy. Jack is the happiest he’s ever been and he adores his new wife. Even better, Eve’s children decide they want spend most of their time with dad.

Eve cuts loose Jack’s fan club, which includes almost everyone who knows Jack. Now, there is no one, except for her children, to nag her about the greatness of Jack. Eve says she is very happy and she feels nothing about losing jack, thanks to Prozac. She dates nice men. She is also very busy delivering speeches, writing blogs, and making television appearances: giving advice about relationships. Best of all, she has three new dogs; she calls them her babies.

When it comes to relationships and marriage, may be men don’t have a say. May be men’s role in life is to be put center stage by women and then picked. One thing I know to be true. Lilith is not a fox after his dinner; she’s a supreme paramour; she’s a specialist; she won.

F.U.C.K. (Folks Using Crack Kids)

Tue, 10 Nov 2009 06:11:56 -0500

Katherine wakes up at 10:00 AM, reaches into a solid gold box studded with rubies for a small wooden container, scoops a little ball of the finest opium paste on earth, and smears the paste with her little finger on the back of her teeth. She lights her Davidoff cigarette with an S. T. Dupont solid gold diamond studded lighter—Piaget and Cartier are low life, she says—and drinks her favorite cheap tea (Twinings’ Prince of Wales). Then she opens a small cocaine (100% Columbian Disco shit) solid gold case, uses the cute little gold spoon attached to the container with a gold chain, drops a scientific amount on a mirror and shapes a perfect morning line using…yes, a solid gold razor.

When Katherine wants to see you, she sends a limo, a private jet, and sometimes, a yacht. Like the rest of her few friends, I only get to see Katherine once every year or so. Her family name is high on the top one percent income list. Katherine is in her late forties, single, opinionated and a true feminist. The birth of more than one male heir years ago stopped the family’s pressure on Katherine to produce one. Katherine loves her freedom, she doesn’t want a boyfriend; Katherine fucks any man she wants.

She has a hierarchy of three personal assistants—each runs a small company of “professionals”—whose job is to keep Katherine’s identity and whereabouts unknown to all the politicians, government officials and corrupt private entities she owns. For more power, Katherine has dirt on all potential enemies, including members of her own family. Katherine gets anything she wants; she is, literally, above the law. Yet, there is only one thing she cannot accomplish: her most cherished goal.

She gives generously, yet anonymously, to many good causes including feminist organizations. Most admirably, Katherine finds and saves abused children, women, prostitutes and crack whores. As long as Katherine does her saving quietly, which she does very well via professionals, she is barely tolerated by the strong few who know. Yet if she decides to support public exposure of the problem, put her money behind legislation to legalize/regulate drugs and prostitution, Katherine goes down. Because this is one of these expensive causes that gets people assassinated, including politicians.

Millions of women, young women and children suffer physical abuse, rape (illegal and legal), sex slavery and murder by dealers, pimps and sportsmen every day. Moreover, there is a vicious rumor that prostitutes are forced to have sex with policemen. I don’t believe that, do you? When a prostitute, a crackwhore or a runaway child prostitute-crackwhore is found raped and dead in an alley; officially, in this cuntry, she’s declared “someone who won’t be missed.” These crimes are a direct result of the faulty laws against drugs and prostitution. The statistics, both official and unofficial, are obscene. The case for regulating drugs and prostitution is solid. The argument is impeccable; the evidence is overwhelming.

That recreational drugs or prostitutes are illegal is an illusion, a hoax. There are a few million Americans, much less powerful than Katherine (say, among the top 20%), who have unlimited access to illegal—recreational or illegally prescribed—drugs and the 3, 5 or 7 thousand dollar hookers. They all have their drugs and prostitutes delivered. None of them will ever be caught, let alone prosecuted. Prostitutes and drugs are illegal only for the poor.

Every now and then you see some politician or a rich guy on TV going to jail for drugs, prostitution or corruption. This is pure red, white and blue fabricated bullshit; it has nothing to do with the law. He simply pissed off some entities wealthier than he is; and “he’s gotta go,” is what they decided.

All Law enforcement resources wasted on the wars on drugs and prostitution should be reallocated to the prevention and punishment of violence, rape and murder. The obscene amount of money saved by legalizing drugs and prostitution should be spent on health care, education and rehab.

The new laws must severely punish the few pimps and drug dealers left after sex work and drugs become legal. A sex worker who pays taxes is a respectable member of any civilized society.

Can Your Child Buy Cocaine From A Pharmacy?

I ask any parent to go to a neighborhood where they sell illegal drugs. They won’t sell it to you. Now send your 8-yr old or teens. Not only will the children buy any illegal drugs they want, they will be given safe passage in the most dangerous of neighborhoods. If you want to keep the little bit of respect your child still has for you, don’t ever ask her where she got the drugs. Illegal drugs are sold around schools; rich kids get their illegal drugs delivered. Because of the current laws, children have the easiest access to illegal drugs. Commenting on searching students for drugs in schools, a teenager once told me, “Are these fucks really that stupid? I’ve never done drugs at school. I always buy and do my drugs after school.”

Say it with me now: If drugs are legal, it is impossible for my child or his friends to buy drugs from CVS/Walgreen. Moreover, CVS will not rape my drug-addicted child and sell her as a sex slave.

Unless all of you Middle-Class adult non-drug user folks leave your jobs and stand in line at the pharmacy to buy cocaine, the plan leaves only poor adult drug addicts. What possible damage to society can a poor man, whose excruciating physical pain disappears after a $2 dose of opium, do? What would you do if you become pain free for the first time in twenty years? Would you go find that heartless, coward, terrified of losing his job, no-narcotics-memo worshiper, riffraff emergency room “doctor” who, even though saw you shiver in pain, still accused you of trying to score drugs and gave you some fucking Tylenol, and burn him alive?

Are Americans Stupid Or Evil?

Why do folks, especially parents and feminists, keep voting against drugs and prostitution? When religious fundamentalists finally started, one by one, to come out and admit that the sole reason they support the war is to kill Muslims, I began to admire their honesty. Why don’t the rest of us just admit we enjoy hearing about these rapes and murders? We thrive on the misery of the weak. We love the delusion that we are better than crack whores. We can stop these atrocities by a simple vote, and yet we don’t. Folks who don’t know that the existing laws are killing women and children are stupid; folks who know are evil.

I dare anyone to prove that a business person is morally superior to a whore.

“Punishing the prostitute promotes the rape of all women.”
Margo St James, quoted in the San Francisco Examiner (29 April 1979)

“The whore is despised by hypocritical world because she has made a realistic assessment of her assets and does not have to rely on fraud (a regular practice between the sexes) to make a living.”
Angela Carter, British author. The Sadeian Woman, “Desecration of the Temple” (1979)

“The women who take husbands not out of love but out of greed are whores in everything but name.”
Polly Adler, A House Is Not a Home (1953)

In America, through their strong influence on women’s vote (and subsequently men and young voters), feminists have earned an undeniable and a decisive legislative power. I, humbly, ask feminists—as the strongest political power—to consider, as a priority, saving this severely abused segment of society. All it would take is a few new pieces of legislation.

This piece is dedicated to Katherine, a kind soul, and a most honorable human being.

Poem: Heaven Is You

Tue, 20 Oct 2009 05:10:13 -0400

Heaven Is You

Does a meadow know whose heart has bled;
What souls have longed, what words were said;
Whose love was just, whose dick was led;
Who kiss’d, who fuck’d, whose tears were shed?

I saw you walk by and I found my gift
I watched your song: a shift then a rift
The beat in the feet and the hips adrift
I prayed the wind your skirt would lift

Without your curves, they’re only seven
By right, the wonders should add eleven
But those who saw were struck by levin
Who wrote your name so high in heaven?

Why wait for death if heaven is you?
Your book, God wrote in ah and ooh
The perfect sphere, She gave you two
And said, “don’t turn, for men would sue.”

This poem is adapted from previous writings as a special tribute, and for those of you who are not familiar with my early work. I dedicate this poem to all maturing women who doubt their femininity or think wrongly—even for a second—that their ass is too big. God bless you all and your beautiful asses.

Levin: Middle English, lightening

The God Solution: Ending Religious Terrorism

Sun, 27 Sep 2009 06:09:49 -0400

Power, religion has, merit; religion has not. Recently many voices warn against the dangers of religious fundamentalism, especially the rising militant right wing evangelicalism. No, I will not pick on Evangelicals; although, if the right wing crusaders get their way, Islamist terrorists will look like boy scouts. That religious fundamentalism (RF) is unhealthy, even fatal, is now a universal fact. RF is a malicious, deeply rooted, real disease of any society that is dangerously gaining too much ground in America. Even worse, it has nothing to do with religion; it is purely tribal politics, just some angry fucks want to kill others and take their money.

We must stop such very expensive useless ridiculous wars against drugs and sovereign nations and start dedicating our resources to fix education and health care. If we must wage a war—other than that on greed—it has to be against RF, here and abroad. This time, we must be rational, well informed and prepared. All nations must participate in the war against RF and America leading by example should reach out abroad and legislate at home. We must regulate Religion. In the following pioneering plan, I will not touch religion, religious beliefs, or freedom of religion. First, as an example, I will show how we can easily defeat Islamists’ ideology and eliminate their support abroad…from home.

We can beat religious terrorists at their own game. Islamist terrorists, for example, simply hijack Islam; pull religious falafels (fatwas) out of the asses, forging the Koran and the Sunnah (the teachings of the Prophet Mohammad) in favor of the violence they preach. Islamists’ ideology is, too, political and tribal; they do not have, as I will show, a religious leg to stand on.

Here, we must remember that many Arab countries began hunting down Islamists (for example, Islamic Jihad in Egypt) and killing them long time before we started the war on terror. That Islamists are hated in Muslim countries is a fact. Moreover, we (and Britain) gave sanctuary to terrorists like Omar Abdul Rahman (World Trade Center 1993 bombings and mentor of Al-Zawahiri), and when the Egyptians warned us and asked to extradite him, we told them to go fuck themselves.

Fortunately, Islam makes Islamists the easiest to defeat and here is why. If we invite the top Islamic scholars from all over the world—let’s say to join a proposed American Islamic Supreme Council—they will all agree on the following facts:

1. Muslims consider the Koran to be the word of God, revealed to the Prophet Mohammad by the Angel Gabriel. The key fact is that not one letter of the Koran has been changed since its writing in the six hundreds. That is, there is only one version of the Koran, only one book, only one source of reference.

2. Muslims should live by the Koran and consult the Sunnah, especially in areas supposedly not covered by the Koran. Here is the best part: if there is any doubt about any issue, according to the Koran, the Koran will take precedence, anytime, anywhere, and on all matters. The Koran, one book, is the only authority.

3. Islamists lie, spin, cut, paste and attribute sick shit to their Koran and Prophet; and together with the enemies of Islam, run with it and recruit terrorists. The American Islamic Supreme Council with all its international Muslim scholars will expose the Islamist ideology as blasphemy and denounce Islamists as heretics…legally. That is, according to the Koran/Supreme Islamic Law. Game over. The media must finish the job by exploiting the shit out of the findings of the Council, defaming Islamists all over the world into oblivion.

4. Taking advantage of the fact, that Islam is not an organized religion—no recognized authority—studded with international Muslim scholars, an American Islamic Supreme Council would represent Muslims all over the world and become a beacon of light. Existing American Islamic institutions, busy with trivial shit like the fucking hijab, are obviously amateurs who have failed to defend their own religion at home and defeat Islamists’ ideology abroad.

For a while now, Muslim scholars everywhere have been exposing the heresies of the Islamists. Here are just a few examples from the Koran on the relevant issue of how Muslims should treat peoples of other religions—the “infidels.”

“O mankind! We have created you from a male and a female, and made you into nations and tribes, that you may know one another.” 49:13

“And if your Lord had so willed, He could surely have made humankind one nation. People will never cease to disagree.” 11:118

“And had your Lord willed, those on earth would have believed, all of them together. So, will you then [who are YOU to] compel humankind, until they become believers?” 10:99

“And when We took from the Prophets their covenant, and from you (O Muhammad), and from Noah, Abraham, Moses, and Jesus, son of Mary; We took from them a strong covenant.” 33:7

“Verily! Those who believe and those who are Jews and Christians, and Sabians (look it up), whoever believes in God and the Last Day and do righteous good deeds shall have their reward with their Lord, on them shall be no fear, nor shall they grieve.” 2:62 and repeated for emphasis in 5:69

“Verily, those who believe, and those who are Jews, and the Sabians, and the Christians, and the Magians (ancient Persian Magus, fire-worshipers), and those who worship others besides God, truly, God will judge between them on the Day of Resurrection.” 22:17

“…Be just witnesses and let not the enmity and hatred of others make you avoid justice. Be just: that is nearer to piety…” 5:8

“Surely, We have sent down to you (O Muhammad) the Book (this Qur'an) in truth that you might judge between men by that which God has shown you, so be not a pleader for the treacherous.” 4:105
“And seek the Forgiveness of God, certainly, God is Ever Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” 4:106

[4:105-106 are two of nine verses (4:105-113) that were revealed to the Prophet Mohammad in defense of a Jew. A Muslim stole, and his friends and family tried to pin the crime on a Jew. The Prophet almost believed the Muslim thief and his friends and almost ruled against the Jew. The nine verses came to warn the Prophet against such an error and urge him to ask forgiveness for what would have been an unforgivable offense.]

The 72 Virgins Myth

The number 72 is never mentioned in the Koran. The phrase “72 virgins” is never mentioned in the Koran. However, the Koran promises the pious—both men and women—beautiful companions in heaven (S55, 56 and 76). That is all. Yet, just for you perverts out there, I found the phrase 72 virgins in “1001 Arabian Nights” and in a pornographic subdivision called “The Return of the Old Man to his Youth,” after the author describes how honey and butter massage will increase the girth of your penis. The horniest Arabic account of heaven I found comes from Al-Suyuti (Koranic commentator and polymath, died 1505). It sounds like a Viagra commercial.

"Each time you sleep with a huriyah (splendid companion) you find her a virgin. The penis of the chosen pious never softens. The erection is eternal; the sensation that you feel each time you make love is utterly delicious and out of this world and were you to experience it in this world you would faint. Each chosen one will marry seventy hur (singular, huriah), besides the women he married on earth, and all will have delicious vaginas."

The God-General Warning: Crimes against God

The premise here is simple. Moses, Jesus, and Mohammad preached love, peace, and justice; denounced unprovoked violence; and defended the poor. That is the true universal God model. Preaching violence against other human beings is a crime against God, and above all, a crime against man. Theological differences, according to God, will be judged only by God—there is plenty of scripture to affirm this; for now, read the Koranic verses above. Sweden found out years ago, that since crimes against man are punished by man, may be crimes against God should be punished by God.

A long-term solution for RF is the mandatory teaching of comparative religion in all schools. Yet immediate measures must be taken. Each of the tax-exempt religions recognized by the government should be required to authorize and present a single doctrine of teachings/beliefs regarding the status of the followers of other religions.Each religion must be required to, clearly, state who goes to Hell. All citizens must have full knowledge of their status according to every religion. Each citizen must know what religion condemns her to hell or wants her dead. The clergy are free to preach anything they want, except hate for others. Hate must be regulated. Laws must be enacted to regulate religious hate and a new government agency must be established to enforce these laws. Any negative speech about another group of people is politics, never religion.

If according to the Koran, for example, Texans will go to hell and Muslims should kill Texans wherever they find them, every mosque must put a sign outside stating exactly that. Surely, the Koran has nothing against Texans and mosques will not be required to hang such signs. Yet, if any Muslim Imam is ever heard spewing shit about Texans, his Mosque must be shut down by the government, because he is in violation of the laws enforced by the Office of the God General (OGG), or the Department of Religious Crimes (DRC), take your pick.

Similarly, Evangelicals can preach against the poor and on the second coming of Christ all they want, but if a pastor teaches that Jesus will smite all Jews who do not convert, the pastor must be required by law to put a sign outside his church stating exactly that. It is hard to imagine how big a sign a right wing militant pastor would need; they hate so many people.

It saddens me that since we are talking about religion, I cannot use scientific arguments like the fundamental truth of unity and that I am one with you, the universe, and God, at a sub-nuclear level; and that if you claim to know God, or even worse, speak for it, you are a fucking idiot. Religiously speaking, rather, if there is a God, it must be both universal—a god of everyone and everything—and good, because that’s what the brain it gave us wants.

AHAB: Ater Hypocrita Audacter Barbaria

Sat, 19 Sep 2009 08:09:52 -0400

I dedicate this post to those hard-working Americans whose ancestors “built this country with their bare hands,” and who believe in a Stock Market blessing-capitalist-American Jesus. I write to those flag-waving nationalists and Bible-thumping militants who believe that Americans are the “best people” in the world—even Chris Mathews said that on TV. I call on those blessed Americans with whom anyone would love to have a beer. I know you “want your country back,” but first, let me tell you why the whole world revered America since its birth and for a long time after.

American Glory

America has always had a special place in the hearts of people all over the world. The major event that triggered America’s pristine and admirable image was its birth. America was founded on the principles of Enlightenment (when reason took over) by world-renowned intellectuals, our founding fathers.

Later, Hollywood (film, television, and music) kept this perception of Pax Americana alive, regardless of growing ugliness at home. Hollywood kept projecting these original beautiful human universals—the quest for truth; good always wins over evil; justice always prevails; the poor farmer gets his farm back from the evil hoarder; and finally the poor handsome boy, rather than the ugly rich fuck, gets the girl. The world loved us; they ate this shit up. It is Utopia. Who would not want that?

The Founders Are Not Your Fathers

There is no a priori reason for assuming that the neoconservatives of today and the Founding Fathers share similar ideologies and no amount of wishing it were so will make it so if it isn’t so. On the other hand, the differences—when admitted by some guilty right-winger—cannot be appealed to when they suit and denied when they do not.

The Founding Fathers were not common men. They were students of the Enlightenment: eggheads who learned from Kant, Descartes, Paine, Hobbes, Hume, and other, by today’s conservative standards, socialist un-American heathens. More than half of the fifty-five members of the Constitutional Convention studied in colleges in America and Europe (especially England). The other members were self-educated. Benjamin Franklin, for example, would have changed his diet immediately if he found something like Reagan or Pat Robinson in his shit. Therefore, people like Bush and Joe the plumber were hardly represented among the politicians who wrote the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution of the United States, an unmatched American marvel. Furthermore, before the writing of the constitution, James Madison presented extensive material, including books sent by Jefferson from France, on confederations and states, to his fellow delegates. The Founding Fathers did not consult God; they researched their work like men of science.

Jefferson, Franklin, Madison, John Adams, would never, even under pain of death, have a beer with Limbaugh, Bush, McCain, Palin, the death skeleton Ann Coulter or that fucking idiot Michael Steele.

Unfortunately, the Founding Fathers’ legacy did not hold for long. Gradually, the underlying American religious fundamentalism and lack of education promoted anti-intellectualism, anti-rationalism, and pseudoscience that survives today. The last of the learned prophets and defenders of American intellectualism, the great Ralph Waldo Emerson—essayist, philosopher, and orator of “The American Scholar”—was defeated.

Signing of the Constitution, senate.gov

Hollywood

American film industry has always been and will always be the best in the world. That is a fact. People all over the world from Sweden to India have always loved American movies, music and television series. The world admires the morals and lovely human sentiments Hollywood presents. They know our films and film stars even better than we do. Over twenty years ago, I was given a lecture by a French writer on the purity of the American soul based on an episode of “Little House on the Prairies” he saw. He was overwhelmed by the kindness, and beauty in the episode, and arrogantly insinuated that I, an American, could not fathom the humanity portrayed.

Did you know that cities around the world look like ghost towns at the exact local time a reputable American series is scheduled to air? I have witnessed this phenomenon myself in Europe many times, but also in the Middle East. Many years ago, in Istanbul, I asked the concierge at the hotel to get me a taxi. I also asked why there is no traffic outside. He smiled superiorly and said, “Dallas is on.” Years before I was in Cairo—the Great Pyramid is a must see—and the streets cleared because “The Fugitive” was on. This is the power of Hollywood.

How many soldiers you think it would take to clear the streets of a city as big as Cairo or Istanbul? In the late sixties, most citizens of foreign cities willingly dropped everything; cleared the streets by 7 PM, and sat down before their televisions to watch American propaganda or “Peyton Place.” This is the power of the word, written, spoken, and filmed. This is the power of art. This is diplomacy of the highest order. An American, thanks to Hollywood, used to get a free pass card anywhere in the world, not so much today. I will always remember with gratitude how Egyptians treated me with kindness and generosity just because I am an American.

Lost in the streets of Cairo at 2 AM in the morning I was picked up by some funny Egyptians, treated to a great meal—at their insistence—before they dropped me off at the Nile Hilton. I remember one of them telling me that any other Egyptian, especially the police, would have protected me and treated me with utmost respect because I am an American. Then he whispered sadly, “Americans, like rich Egyptians are protected by the police. When a poor Egyptian is murdered, no one cares. You know what the police here call a murdered poor guy…someone who won’t be missed; can you believe this, sir?” I said, “No.” Somehow, it felt cruel to ruin the Egyptian’s beautiful image of America.

When we talk about power, we can never forget the monumental role of the BBC and the great services it provided to citizens all over the world, especially those who hid in their basements with their radios waiting for a word of hope.

Hollywood Sign, planetware.com

Post Civil War and Reconstruction era in the late nineteenth century comes the Gilded Age with an explosion of population and consequent excesses of wealth and poverty. Robber Barons—like John D Rockefeller, Cornelius Vanderbilt, Andrew Carnegie, and J.P. Morgan—needed to justify their thievery. They hired none other than the Anti-Christ himself: William Graham Sumner, a Yale University political scientist, who concocted an ideologically driven pseudoscience to rationalize social injustice. Sumner, the most influential social Darwinist of his time, and his followers theorized that millionaires like J.P. Morgan are descendants of the first hominids to stand on two legs, while the poor descended from creatures that lacked opposable thumbs and stood on all fours. Sumner decided that the business titans of the Gilded Age were “a product of natural selection” and fair ‘scientific’ market competition. No one, in my opinion, has done more damage to the culture of this nation than that motherfucker has. Unfortunately, probably none of today’s right wing think tanks knows who the fuck is Sumner; I’ll tell you, he is your rightful God.

Incidentally, the United States is almost an entire continent that started out with the most abundant natural resources available on the planet. Natural resources translate into money; money buys skill, and skill builds nations. That is it. Without natural resources—that is, capital—capitalism means shit.

“First you destroy those who expose the spin. Then you destroy those who know what the spin is, and who also know that those destroyed before were in fact the ones who exposed the spin. But real barbarism begins when no one can any longer judge or know that what he does is barbaric.”

Adapted from Ryszard Kapuscinski (b. 1932), Polish Journalist. “A Warsaw Diary,” in Granta, no. 15 (Cambridge, England, 1985).

In any Kleptocracy, autocracy, corpocracy, or dictatorship, the citizens are well aware of the injustices they endure, and yet the corrupt government-run media glorify social justice and demonize inequality and nepotism 24/7. No nation on the planet, regardless of its system of government glorifies social injustice, except America. I tried very hard to find a name—something-ocracy—for our system to no avail, although, Kleptocracy is a close fit. In America, the big money owns the media, the politicians, the clergy, and many scientists. Together they promote an irrational cultural mindset leading the people to vote against their own interest; it is insanity.

For example, many billionaires from Bill Gates to Ted Turner have frequently said that they personally neither need nor want their tax breaks. Wealthy kind Americans would rather the government tax them more and spend that money on education and/or healthcare. Meanwhile, thousands of corporate media-instructed American patriots—who have inadequate, or no, healthcare, and whose children are undereducated, and malnourished—are out on the streets carrying signs against “socialized medicine,” “redistribution of wealth,” and “gay marriage.” These ferocious protestors always look and sound angry even though they do not know what cause they are fighting for; they have no clue why the pastor at church or Limbaugh on the radio told them to march. This motif of unnatural vulgarity is probably triggered by the long frustrating search for someone to spell-check their signs.

When the corporate-appointed useless middleman (for example, insurance companies) is robbing the citizens and the citizens know that they are being robbed by the middleman, but the citizens still blindly protect and promote the middleman; what do you call that? I call it malicious audacious hypocrisy of the lame.

Dear American Patriot,

You can still believe in creationism, or that the sun revolves around the earth or that dinosaurs and humans coexisted; fuck evolution. Yet I beg you to unite with the rest of us un-Americans to stop wars and eliminate greed (the middleman), take that money and provide free health care and free higher education for all Americans, including your children. After all, you don’t want your own child to grow up to be like you; no one is that evil.